I would have thought it would be easier for women until l got on this site. There are quite a few pissed off bitter women here. I don't see as many men here with those traits. Maybe it is peculiar to this site. ☺

Oh, honey, that ship sailed long ago......

I am not 'sweet', and I like my hard edges.
If people think you're sweet, they'll walk all over you.
If they know you'll cut them off at the knees, they don't fuck with you.
I'll take the latter.

I'm not even 40, but I hope at least until 80 some things still make me hard

It was not easy for me to get there, but now that I am there, it's easy to stay.

Song what I wrote

Callouses and scars (or an apology of a commitaphobe)

When I look at these old hands
as theyre playing my guitar
Its hard to tell the difference between the callouses and scars
they say that women come from Venus Men they are from mars
Now thats something like the difference
between callouses and scars

Can you get up from the canvas
When youve taken all those all those blows
And though you cannot see it yet
his eyes are nearly halfway closed
You might think that hes running scared
When hes still behind steel bars
And tell me can you tell the difference
between callouses and scars

You ask him what he wants from life
and he just gives you that look
Like your some kind a of hustler
Who he knows hes just been took
But cannot plot course If you don't know where you are
Sometimes it`s hard to tell the difference
between callouses and scars

We all have our scar tissue
and it shouldnt be an issue but theyre real
and Its no good you complaining
cos he`s no use at explaining
how he feels

Now you might think I am taking this analogy too far
But I you are looking closely and I view from afar
You come to him with an open heart
Whilst his is just ajar
Seeing is believing
with callouses and scars

when I look at these old hands
as theyre playing my guitar
Though my mind may be in the gutter
Im still staring at the stars
And even I can`t tell the difference
between the callouses and scars

Here's the simple response. A man cries in public, see the response. A woman cries in public, see the response. I don't think it is as bad as it used to be, but as a person who has been taller then most people all my age, and eventually, much bigger, I was expected to be tough, and if I wasn't, I was picked on, because it made kids feel more powerful. This doesn't change with age, I find.

The picture would make a lovely tattoo

But don't be a fool either.

I think that most people are actually soft inside, but maintain a hard exterior to ward off the potential for others to get too close and hurt them. It is also (I think) very important to ensure that your exterior is not that hard that right one for you (of honorable intention) is able to get through.

Yeah I'd say it all falls down to the individual and how we choose to deal with stuff...Myself personally I prefer to be a peppy mother fucker! With an incredibly dark sense of humor.

Its a personal choice that for the most part we try to adjust everyday to our constantly changing conditions. Life's dynamic is what makes it interesting but you're right, don't let it steal your sweetness

So often, our past experiences place dents in our character be it good or bad. Some hardens us over time, some makes us stronger to be a better person. Attitude plays a huge part in all of this.

Yes.
Socialization, a.k.a. brainwashing.

Sometimes, quite often really, somethings in the world make me real hard, but after a while, with some effort, I get soft again. The process is quite enjoyable really

I like to move through life like water. Flow around things that are in your way. Wait until your volume allows you to flow over a dam. Always move with gravity, not against it. Not soft. Inevitable. Y'all following me here?

I'd say bitterness would and could apply to any human being regardless of sex.

I think there might be more social pressure toward men to be 'hard', but I never much cared for social pressure. I'll be soft if I want. ?

Pretty...