This is a dating site!?

I don't know much about dating sites. I doubt my wife would be any too happy about my setting out to do research in the area. Because of this, I can't say whether you're overthinking. On the other hand, I think I can safely say that this site is probably not like any dedicated dating site, mainly because it isn't a dedicated dating site. I have found some rather interesting people here, many of whom I would probably enjoy one on one in face to face situations. There is not much like a cup of good coffee mixed with stimulating repartee.

We do seem to be a minority. We are looking for substance over fluff.

I agree with the other commenters. This site doesn't have as many of the same problems as other dating sites have.

I dipped my toe in the water of one site and recoiled in horror as if it was battery acid. No no no. I like to get to know people on other levels first. Shared interests, good discussion, mutual things in common. Then let's see. Never in my life had a good relationship start out so superficially.

You get a more sophisticated kind of deception on these pages

Nope, not over thinking at all. It seems my "matches" on those sites want you yo have a Harley (I like Ducati and BMW myself), have a good job (while they are unemployed) and/or have a nice new car (that their unemployed ass can drive while you are at work on your bike).
No thanks, apparently having a brain isn't a requirement or being stupid is.

Through match.com I met Dan. He and I hiked, downhill skied and had fun together. We were lovers for three years, at which point I decided it was too painful to love a man who was incapable of love and commitment. We broke up.

But we continued as friends and hiking partners. Our last backpacking trip was to Lake Caroline and aptly-named Windy Pass. We had a great time! Alas, Dan moved to Utah.

Photos: Lake Caroline where we camped, The Enchantments, Mt. Cashmere and craggy cliffs above our campsite. Sept. 2015

I have had some good relationships through some of theses sites, don't knock them ?

No not overthinking, just thinking which is very healthy. And yes, have tried other "dating" sites which only ended up costing me quite a bit of money and there were really no potential mates for a radical like me. Seemed all they were looking for was long walks on a beach at sunset and someone to cuddle while watching television (i don't do television). Am only a recent member to Agnostic but the conversations are refreshing.

No, you're right. And most of the men here do the same..look a photo, then start in on women with zero knowledge or interest in them as people.

Because of this blind spot, most men here don't write profiles or answer the profile questions because THEY never look at them.
Look! A hot woman! I think I'll go for her!

The few men who do write profiles and talk about women's actual hobbies and interests are often men strong in female traits, who see woman as people, not just a "score," although, if they are cis hetero, they are also sexually attracted to them.

Since studies show that most high IQ creative people are androgynous (mixed gender traits), and statistically, agnostics and atheists are higher IQ than the general population, there is a high percentage of androgynous people here.

As usual, if you try to troll me, I'll just block you. I know how gender issues can bring on the trollers.

I dare say it's humanity that's sad and shallow. Internet dating sites are just an indicative symptom of a much larger problem.

Dating sites as well as most of not all social sites bring in trolls and fakes. I just had a request off Facebook yesterday from some alleged lady to talk on hangout. It didn't take long for the person to show their true intent of wanting me to receive a package from a relative full of brand new iPhones. But I used the time to track that ISP and send it forward to authorities. I've seen this scam several times and they aren't even smart enough to try and change the scam. Either that or it still works effectively to keep trying it.

True most people on tinder and sites like that are just after casual sex but hey everyone's got needs and trying to find intellectually stimulating conversation or logical discourse on sites like that is pointless when the level of conversation comes down to ur cute wanna fuc seriously thats how low some peoples standards are. I've found the people here to be much more interesting theres no look at me I'm so pretty going on from the ladies and the men don't seem to be as desperate here its kinda chill

Yes you are over thinking things, since this site isn't really setup for dating as much as a lobby to talk with your atheist community.

I've spent a fair amount of time on Tinder, POF, and OkCupid. It certainly does work to help you meet people, and yes you can find dates or at least someone to chat with.

HOWEVER, it is very difficult to get through the masses of competition. Sometimes it really is much easier to just chat with people at a bar or wherever you happen to be.

I have tried OkStupid, er, Cupid, and eScarmony, er, Harmony, and neither worked for me.

Well.... you may meet a person of interest in here. I would say that it would be wise to make posts and make a comment so members can see you. Eventually you may meet that special person in here and others can compliment your character. Tell us something about you in your profile. Good luck in your endeavor. Glad you found us. Have fun..

Sometimes it gets a little pretentious around here.

I have to agree with you. I would take brains any day. No you are not over thinking things.

I have been using Plenty of Fish casually for years, with a little common sense it is fine.

Doesn't your complaint about people not filling out their profiles seem a bit hypocritical to you?

A lot of people see this as just a forum for rational discussion.

What, that's not true. Follow me here at "insert shady link one should never EVER click on"

Yes we are. The social interface provides a good distraction when you're not getting responses which lets admit it - 80% of people we've sent inquiries to do not even bother to open the message (especially the ones who say communication is important.)