Everyone had different drives and interests. If she has always been hyper religious then she probably never got to explore or developed her sexuality outside of contact with her husband. Or through guilt laden experiences before marriage. At 30yrs of marriage she has probably been through menopause and now has even less interest.
For me itsa a deal breaker. Ar least to start a relationship. My wife has some pretty serious chronic illnesses but is still very interested in sex. We don't do it as often as we would like simply because the activity often makes her symptoms worse. But she is always ready to play

I think sex is healthy in a relationship and it's usually the women, sometimes the men, who do not want sex. I bet you anything he's got a piece on the side.

Depends on the person. I couldn't survive in a sexless relationship.

There is no Yes or No answer to this. Every couple is different and the only thing that matters is compatibility. The trouble would arise if they were way out of sync with each other in sex drive. Personally, I was never interested in how often other couples had sex, I couldn’t say what too little would be, but you are drawing a lot of conclusions from scant information about the couple you refer to. I know of couples who never have sex due to erectile dysfunction or other problems such as injury, and still manage to have a loving relationship. I have always believed it is essential to really like your partner because over time the initial passion will lessen and then something more like deep affection will take it’s place.

It depends if both partners are satisfied being sexless. It didn’t work for me. Not only did I want sex and not get it, I received no physical affection (hand holding, hugs, etc).

Is a horse a requirement for a pleasant carriage ride?

The people in a relationship should be sexually compatible. A person with a high sex drive and one with a low sex drive is going to lead to resentment over time. Same for a person who is adventurous with one that wants vanilla sex. It is all ok but giving up, or being forced to endure, due to the difference, leads people to feel like they are missing out. That is very unhealthy long term.

Alternatively, some people have open relationships so that they can stay with each other without having to match in the area of sex.

There is also nothing wrong with porn in an amount that helps him feel like he is not missing out as long as it doesn't leave her wanting. Unfortunately, most people hide their true desires, even from their partners, for fear of being judged. A real partnership is supportive of varying desires and each can share openly without fear of judgement. It is really the only way to figure out how both, or all, people in a relationship can be fulfilled.

I believe the majority of people would agree that for a romantic relationship to thrive and survive, there has to be a sexual relationship. I am one of those people. However, there are always exceptions. I’ve known people who are in relationships that are not sexual and it seems to work for them.

Asexual is code for married.

No. It depends on the person.

I'm sick of our culture's obsession with sex.

Love can exist without sex. I know a few couples like this who are devoted to each other. But for me, a sexless romantic relationship didn’t, doesn’t, and won’t ever work. Physical intimacy is the key to the lock that keeps me with someone. Even just a cuddle. The warmth and closeness it provides is invaluable.

The old pennies in the jar story is quite true..most cis hetero men lose much of their sexual interest in their bride after two years and the sex frequency drops dramatically.

Then there are people who are on the asexual spectrum. In my case, I'm demisexual, so I do at least feel sexual attraction after a prolonged courtship of over a year. And even then, it's just for one person, and I can take it or leave it.

But when I did indulge, my strong libido and capacity for play and variety intimidated cis hetero men, who seemed to prefer "rabbit love" - as quick as possible, which most cis hetero women seem to prefer..

1. you can not judge a person's sexual apetite and satisfaction by a photo picture. That's incredible assumption.

2. SOME people DON'T LIKE SEX.

3. Sex is not required for a health happy relationship

I am single so my perspective is second hand. For married folk I talk openly with sex is a very important part of a healthy relationship. For those married with an unwilling/unable partner, there is a lack of full emotional health in their relationship. I am guessing there is a spectrum of need for each person so you will need a large sample group and a metric for defining "satisfying and healthy".

Sounds like you want to help your friend, IF she is unhappy in her marriage. Every marriage (and relationship, for that matter) is a different combination of various components. Priorities of those components might or might not be agreeable to both parties in equal measures. Those are factors in deciding whether to stay together, work on issues, create work arounds, that might not be anyone’s business, or give it all up for door number 3.

While you might feel sorry for your friend, remember the quantity of sexual activity does not necessarily equal quality.

There may be psychological factors that could be helped with counseling, but sometimes there is just a lack of physical and emotional attraction. So the decision to stay together, despite a lack of sexual satisfaction, is a thoughtful decision. Your friend might complain to you, to vent her frustration, but she may not really want to do anything about it, except vent. Or perhaps she is seeking advice from you?

I was married a long long time. My ex-husband was not affectionate, not particularly physically attractive to me, and simply could not win or keep my admiration after the many demeaning things he would say and do. He was abusive as well. So it was simply impossible for me to want to have sexual relations with him. We slept apart, for 20+ years of our marriage. Duty sex, when demanded, was obviously not satisfying for me. Couldn’t wait to get out of the marriage, but thought it best to stay together for the kids.

After freeing myself from my bad marriage, I became the sexual being I always was inside and had an intimate partner for several years who helped me discover the joys of sex. Saddest part of this discovery is lamenting about all the years I missed out on such wonderful sex, had I left my marriage sooner.

I don’t think a satisfying sex life is mandatory for a marriage or a relationship, but it definitely is a bonding gesture that enhances a relationship greatly and can sometimes be the one thing that keeps a couple together during other dissatisfactions. The success of a relationship can not be based on sexual compatibility alone. There must be other factors that keep her invested in the marriage.

If it weren't for sex, I would just hang out with my friends, no romance required.

no sex = no real relationship

I hesitate to infer anything into the nature of your friends' intimate lives beyond the information given explicitly. A smirk in a photograph is way too ambiguous to drill down to something as specific as a porn addiction.

People have different libidos from one another, and a person's libido varies over the course of one's lifetime and one's emotional route through life.

Speaking strictly for myself, I've found that in the early stages of a romantic relationship I can't get enough of her: I want sex a lot, and it's fun and passionate and pleasingly distracting from other things. That "pleasingly distracting" part is critical: if the relationship is nothing but sex, it's not going to last very long, because the sex is distracting from doing other things necessary to build the relationship. Over time, desire tapers down but never goes away.

Also, I've been fortunate in my life to not have any sort of physiological problems interfering with ability or desire. Not everyone is so fortunate.

I think every couple is different, if they are BOTH happy with ones a month, good for them!!!!!
.. I would probably die tho... LOL

In my marrige we’d barely get to double figures in a year. I hated that. I think subconsciously it lead to resentment and anger which then made me not be the husband perhaps I should’ve been.

Depends on the people involved. I was in a sexless marriage for way too long. It was also a verbally abusive relationship. It fucking sucked and has scarred me. It’s been 8 years since that ended and I’m still recovering.

Sex should never be a requirement. In some situations it might not even be possible. Needs, desires, and ability should be understood by both parties.

No one mentioned an open relationship. What if one partner had a fetish that the other couldn't or didn't want, for various reasons, do? They are great together but that stands in the way. What if children are involved? Should they divorce? In many great stories the men have philandered while the wife remained at home,miserably faithful.

It didn't work for me. The difference in our definition of what "normal" married sex should be was way off. She would be quite willing to live together if there were no physical activities involved. I have absolutely no interest in a platonic housemate. When I love someone, I want to be as close to that person as two people can get. And it doesn't get any closer than sex. If I am going to have to masturbate and watch porn for sex, why bother having a wife or girlfriend? LOL

Might be best see b4 marrage if used to lots say 2/3 times a week,then after marry reduced to say 1 week, then 1 per month, then 1 yr, get out of marrage b4 you age badly