A student failed to have her paintings ready for her Senior exhibition. Her water heater exploded a month prior and ruined them.

A family member had a Quaker parakeet who hated everyone but her. One morning she was late to work because the parrot attacked my sister and got tangled in her super thick hair! ?

I was late to work once becaise a cop rear ended me at a stop light... then he wanted me to just buff it out instead of calling his seargent which I was having none of.

Heard: "My cat puked in my shoe"

Used: (I was living in Louisiana near the Mississippi river). "There are gators between my house & the car & I am not going to fight dinosaurs with a broom to come into work." (They had actually told me to shush the gators away with a kitchen broom)

I worked in HR, I have heard them all.

I'm not above calling out from the parking lot. But if I'm late I usually don't give an excuse. What's done is done.

I was looking after my friends sons hamster, whilst they were all away on holiday. The hamster got loose and chewed though the wire of my alarm clock and electrocuted itself. I then had to go to a pet shop and find a lookalike replacement for the hamster.

Keeping in the theme of this community, “I was preoccupied. God moves in mysterious ways.”

I've never attempted to excuse myself from being late - I made clear to all of my employers that I would likely be late reporting to work and if that meant that I wouldn't receive the full raise that was OK. They accepted it and it was never a problem because when I did arrive I performed and got sh@t done on time. As a result, I always received my full raise and I think that's because they appreciated the honesty.

The British rail network has some the best reasons for delays;
Leaves on the line
The wrong type of snow

The the prize goes to an Indian airline
We apologize for your delayed flight. This is due to the pilot being eaten by a tiger

I remember being in school, my then best friend walked into class a full 30 minutes late. The teacher asked him for an explanation. “Traffic was bad” he said.

...he lived across the road from school. We laughed for ages.

I have been late several times going to remote Thailand schools because public transport songtheah wouldn't stop for me. I had to ask my boss for a lift a couple of times before I learned to take a songtheah to an intersection south of town where all the songtheaw had to stop.

I usually err in the direction of early, so it isn't a common problem for me.

"It was dark, so instead of taking my blood pressure medication I took an opana."

He didn't last very long.

Someone smashed my car window and I had to file a police report and get the window fixed.

Ship ran aground, Sir.

i had to kill a blind rabbit said i to my boss

The flying saucer that kidnapped me ran out of gas…

Sorry I am late, I didn't want to come.

A freak accident involving a toaster, hippo, and a bag of frozen peas. You don't want to know the details.

Someone came to work late once and just said "I would have been on time but I didn't really want to." Good to be honest at least.

I drank too much last night

I can never think of these things on the spot. Not really sure of any crazy excuses I've heard, I'm sure I've given a few though! XD

"Sorry, I was in Poland this morning" was a memorable one from a junior colleague recently.

Two of them from the same friend--after a massive flood she sent her boss a photo of the street, which was under chest-high water. And after a huge snowfall she sent the same boss a photo of her car, buried under several feet of snow, with a small bit cleared off and the note 'This took an hour and a half.'

<Smug mode>
I've worked from home for myself for 15 years now. Never late as I manage my own time.
</Smug mode>