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Alone time

A lot of people, myself included, require alone time.

What do you do in your alone time and why do you think it’s necesaery to your well-being?

How much alone time do you prefer on a daily or weekly basis?

What happens to you when you don’t get any time to yourself and is there a limit to how much you can take?

If you don't like or need time by yourself, what happens when you’re forced into it?

AMGT 8 Jan 12

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31 comments

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0

Don`t ask x rated questions LOL

8

For most of my life, I was rarely alone until 2010 after my divorce. I was always having to be attentive to someone's needs. I remember when I moved into my apartment, how free I felt. I would get up in the morning, put on some music and dance. Lol

I prefer a lot of alone time. I read, research, blog, get involved in online discussions, watch documentaries and lectures on YouTube, go out for a ride with some good tunes, make an elegant meal and eat by candlelight, walk on the beach, and do some creative stuff.

I've always had to be adaptive but having to adapt and compromise to accommodate others for all these years wearing because I rarely had the time or the opportunity to decompress. I'm a bit more selfish these days mainly because throughout my life I was doing most of the compromising, especially in relationships.

was wearing* --- edit button where art thou?

@AMGT ❤

@AMGT I think too few understand how much time and energy kids take, until it is too late (some have that need to care for others and some of us are a bit selfish). I was the main caretaker for our daughter until she was 7 1/2 and know how much work and time consuming it can be. Her mother then kidnapped her and headed to 'Bakersfield' (I was in Germany). . Long story. Anyway, I did see my daughter (when she was 12) a month or so each year but it was more a fun visit than an obligatory one.

@AMGT This brought sad and happy tears to my eyes - might be Into the Mystic that is playing on repeat also. AMGT, if it’s okay to ask, why did Jake die? (I don’t even know you and my heart is broken.)

@AMGT Oh my goddddddd........I am sooo sorry. I can not know your pain...still my heart aches for what I have no doubt is a pain that will be with you forever. <hug> Thank you for responding and sharing.

7

I do need alone time. I currently live alone (with my cat) and have plenty of it, probably too much. But even when I'm in a relationship and spending time with that person, I demand time for myself. It doesn't always go over very well.

@AMGT I gave space to clingy spouses walking the dog bicycling to the store to get her or kids treats retreating to my bathtub taking extra work all gave us both space. ...I think the best marriages begin with negotiated time together and keeping up the pattern habits. ...marriage is for gift giving not glued flesh
....the gift of self is love. ..I gave everything I had to both daughters no matter how crazy their moms got

@AMGT I am laughing because my recent ex was just like that!! He thought and expected that when he was at work or whatever, that was enough time alone time for me. He does shift work, so was home 1-2 weekends a month. If he was home all weekend —even in the garage, he wanted my attention and wanted me to go to gym, run errands, etc. only when he wasn’t home. It became exhausting worrying if he was feeling ignored.

7

I deal with people on a consistent basis working in IT. My alone time kicks in the minute I walk into my home.

balou Level 8 Jan 12, 2018

I can relate. I'm in IT too. And though most of my work is project work, I still do a lot of service work as well. I like the people, but I'm good with going home and snuggling with my beautiful cat.

6

Need. Massive. Amounts. Of. Alone. Time.
I have a t-shirt that I sometimes wear to work that says:
You've read my shirt. Now go away. That's enough social interaction.
Lol.

@AMGT me too

6

I love my alone time, although I'm probably spending more time reading posts on this site!!! Lol

6

I'd just like to have a bit less of it than I currently have.

Jnei Level 8 Jan 12, 2018
5

i love that! you have to be comfortable with self

4

Get some everyday. Also like to pick a little, just me and my banjo. Am retired, and my wife and I are sure to make space. We both are introverts.

4

alone time.... put my mind in coast and take my feet off the pedals.

4

I get up early in the morning to get some time alone. A couple of hours of drinking coffee, grading papers, reading, watching the news generally gets me through. Otherwise, I’m tied at the hip to my daughter.

@AMGT I wouldn’t trade it.

4

I need quiet solitude. I'd prefer to spend no more than, say, two to three hours each day around other people. Most of my alone time is spent working, but otherwise I'm resting or online or eating.

@AMGT I eat a lot of fruit throughout the day. It's almost a job unto itself. 🙂

4

I am a loner and an introvert and prefer to be by myself most of the time, but I enjoy spending time with a woman when I have the opportunity to do so, which isn't very often. I have been a single man and have lived alone for over 40 years and while I am alone, I do not feel that I am lonely. I am retired, I have hobbies and I enjoy traveling by car and train and have a camping trailer and I enjoy camping and being in nature.

4

To clear my mind, sort out the clutter, process new ideas/information and consider new perspectives. I pretty much get alone time when I want it now that responsibilities a fewer.

In my younger days, I would grab alone time when the opportunity arose.

Betty Level 7 Jan 12, 2018
4

I like and love alone time. I write poetry. work on music, Planning to paint again. Creativity flows. The silence, to hear me myself think. The lack of interruption so the sequence continues. I am comfortable when I can impose my own timetable.

3

I really need my alone time. I don't think I like people much.

3

I'm alone most of the time-online and watching news on MSNBC

2

I'm quite introvert by nature and spend plenty of time by myself already. I'm not much for big groups so I only ever hang with a small handful of people at any given time. I get plenty of people time at work already. Rather be alone by myself than alone in a crowd.

I live near a nice nature preserve where I go to kill time and enjoy the scenery. I'll throw a podcast, debate, or just music onto my phone and just get lost for 2 or 3 hours walking the trails. I actually like the winter the best because of how nice everything looks and the shoreline in the bay area recedes. I can walk along the shore and even go a good 30ft out onto the ice without much fear. Plenty of friendly animals too, just a pleasant sanctuary that lets me unwind.

2

It takes everything in me to be in public, and I have yet to find a partner that I don't classify as public. I come home drained and wrung out. Alone time allows me to reenergize. Current soft sciences (interpersonal communication, psychology) term that kind of person an introvert. Extroverts need to be in a group of people to reenergize. My friends are usually extroverts. I just find them exhausting after a while and happily leave early

1

I seem to go through periods of needing solitude and periods of needing company. May be weeks at a time at worst, it seems. I think it results from overstimulation. With managed control of socialization, it seems like it can’t be controlled, to some degree.

Can*

1

Alone time is a part of my nature. I have been alone some 17 years in my life and a couple of relationships only emphasized the importance of alone time. However, I am also adaptable. My last relationship showed me one can have their proverbial cake. Any given year we were apart some 3 months (not all at once). That suited both of us. Often when we were together we each were active in our passions which did and did not include the other. Having someone to share day to day duties (cooking, housework, building work/repairs and on) actually gave us more quality time. This was a best world for me and I greatly miss it.

1

I like some alone time, but a balance is good.
I spend time on the computer and have the news (usually) on in the background when alone.
I get more alone time than I like right now and it's depressing.

1

I go to the gym, watch tv, get on my computer, play with my dogs. I definitely need my alone time. I can only take so much time around people. If I don't get alone time I start getting testy with people, even my friends. They know I need my time to myself. I'll take all the alone time I can get. I can be alone for a week and be happy.

1

Trying to do this more. My favorite is silent meditation or going over some 12-step literature. When you're going through a fucked-up part of your life it can be hard to be alone. It's easy to get stuck in those internal dialogs...

@AMGT Thank you. Let me think about that. If I do take you up on your offer- message?

1

Alone time is as essential to me as breathing. I have learned over the years to accept the intrusions of others -- so much so that it no longer bothers me. I work best when alone and all is at least reasonably quiet.

Fortunately, my wife and kids have all been understanding about this so it hasn't created any undue stress in the household and I appreciate that so much that when the intrusions do occur, I take them in stride. Most of the time....

1

If I don't get alone time I feel jangled, like my mind can't quiet down. I need to be able to pace myself at work if possible and when I go home I am usually by myself or with critters after that

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