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How long should you go without sex before giving up?

By Wyattpa5
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72 comments (26 - 50)

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What do you mean by giving up? And why are we going without sex?


You should just masturbate and not be obsessed with sex.


Dude - Its bad for your health to go without for a long time.

beenthere Level 6 Dec 16, 2018

with or without a partner? and why would someone else's threshold impact your own threshold? only you know the answer to this question.


genessa Level 8 Sep 8, 2018

Until the day you die!


Well if you aren't getting any you have answered your own question. It's a strange question to ask and it lacks any substance or information from which to form an opinion. Maybe a better question might be "Why am I not getting any sex?"

Heffster Level 5 Aug 29, 2018

Oooo, judgy! Meow!

@Livia - and? We ALL judge people everyday. You included. Indeed, you just did with your comment. If someone makes an observation, they should be willing to defend that view with someone else who may see it differently. I thought my comment was fairly innocuous. I could of said "This guy is fishing for fuck buddies" - because that is what I actually think. I genuinely don't care, it's not like I am on his interests list (sex is though) Good luck to him I say. So, there you have it smile001.gif An honest opinion kinda forced out of me by your sarcasm.

@Heffster ok, I just found it rude to suggest it’s his fault he doesn’t get much sex, and he was being strange all in one comment. Now I know I was absolutely justified to comment that you were being...well, bitchy, to put a finer point on it. There are many reasons people are not meeting each other romantically or not having much or any sex. I didn’t see it as “fishing”, I saw it as lamenting. Not having sex can make people feel lonely or inadequate, (although it shouldn’t) and I don’t think people need to throw shades about it.

@Livia You don't like my attitude. That's okay, lot's don't smile001.gif I'm like Marmite. You either like me or hate me. I don't lose sleep other either. Not so sure about Bitchy though? You will know when I am being bitchy smile001.gif

@Heffster You are growing on me...that’s how I got into marmite in the first place.


Go ahead and give up. Just say the hell with it. When women sense that you aren’t needy they’ll come running up in droves, wanting to drop their drawers. You’ll have an entirely different category of problem.

I wonder if that other well known Lothario Valentino ever said "drop their drawers' It has such a romantic ring about it. I'll try it next time I'm out and get back to you.

The only time I ever found random women seeming to be interested in having sex was when I was married. During periods when I wasn’t married, suddenly they all disappeared.


For some reason, I found this question really funny !

How do you mean "giving up" - like jumping off a bridge ? Cutting off your hands ? What ?

My instinctive answer will be "as long as it takes ..."

evergreen Level 8 Aug 28, 2018

I was wondering the same thing.


Giving up? Like giving up and jerking off?


In a relationship or otherwise?


Giving up on what exactly?

maxhyde Level 7 Aug 28, 2018

There is no "should". It's something only each individual can decide for themselves.

KKGator Level 9 Aug 28, 2018

About twenty years after death would seem reasonable.

Francool Level 5 Apr 12, 2019

If you pay attention, the best sex you will ever have is with yourself, IMO, because nobody cares like you!


Never. Always keep trying.


I will infer you don't use self gratification (masterbation) as a mental and hormonal balancer and associate both sexual desire and emotional intimacy as one and the same?

How unfortunate for you.

I can admit that I have not had a consistent physical sexual partner for over years now. But that is not to say that I lack physical or emotional intimacy nor a positive sexual drive.

Somewhere along the way I consistently found that others were lacking. Not willing to spend the time to really get to know each other. Or worse, it was very clear that those I had bas luck at dating were more interested in what car I drove, where I was taking them for dinner, or what I was going to them.

after over ten years off and on throught out my 20s I learned a few things for whatever reason I was attracted to one of two people. Those who it would turn out where not sexually attracted to my sex, or those already in a committed relationship.

"They seemed easier to talk to, to enjoy conversations with and to go out and have fun". Bit where it ended was a clear boundry where there was no intimacy or physical connection allowed.

Once a year I use to (it has been about five years since I stopped torturing myself) I would sign out for those dating websites where you go through about 40-60 questions and personality tests.

Each time it would come back with, "in our database of over 6 million members we found only 1% are a match for you.

That is when I realized that I needed to start with learning to love myself before I could love others. Being alone shouldn't mean you are alone. You've got yourself, learn to love the quite times and care for you.

So what I learned was to love myself and to put my energy into improving me, supporting me, and leading my life to benefit my welfare and those I loved. Even if it meant not finding another to share it with.

And maybe someday others will come along who see the same or they won't..

Until then, I have books to read, games to , and projects to work on and I am damn will going to put my heart and soul into it. Because I want to prove to myself that yeah, I am awesome.

And you can be too. Fall in love with yourself again.. and maybe others just might see that glow you have, if you shine bright enough.


It seems that I have no cut off. It has been two or three without any sexual partner and 13 without any actual intercourse. I could never have imagined this possibility in my younger days, but here I am. I guess I used up my quota when I was younger.


Its been 2 years

vladman93 Level 3 Jan 21, 2019

It depends on your dedication your partner. My late husband was incapable for the last few years of our marriage but he was also the only one I wanted while he lived. Now without that commitment, I don't want go any longer than it takes find a serially monogamous partner. I just cannot wrap my mind around polyamory relations.

SadbDanae Level 5 Jan 12, 2019

30 minutes


Half a second


I gave up for a biblical seven years, many years ago.

When I began dating again, it was because I'd worked hard to start feeling better about myself. Situationally, little else had changed (except thirty pounds extra). After seven years of dating and a couple of relationships, I met my now ex-gf. We had two great years together and planned marriage/kids/real estate. We thought we were set.

But then we broke up. It was horrible; I didn't want to date again. But I egged myself into it again, for fear of returning to that dry spell. I don't envy the first few women I met, having to deal with my recent damage. But I did meet someone new in two months' time, nine years ago. And we've been better together every year since. Because I didn't give up.


I've been without for quite a few years now, even in my last relationship i was very lonely. Im not sure if its a matter of whether there is some sort of time period involved. Depends on if you find someone else, if you're lucky enough go for it!


Almost a year and couldn't handle it anymore ! Then I unexpectedly met someone who I got intimate with for a few months. He reminded me of what I had been missing out on ! Found out he has a GF, although he is not happy so I continue to see him. I'm too old to walk away from a good thing. Nothing is perfect. I'm surprisingly okay with this for now. Amazing how you start to think differently as you get older .

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