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To sleep together or to not sleep together?

What one would you rather do with your significant other or spouse?

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SonderOpia 8 Jan 25

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Is nice to feel someone next to you. Winter warmth. In the warmer month those hot nights sweating with passion.


After being with my ex-husband for 10 years sleeping in the same bed was a nightmare. We had to sleep separate hours just to be able to sleep. I think having separate rooms is a lot better because 1 you get to decorate your own room 2 if you snore or toss and turn a lot you're not bothering the other one 3 you can sneak into each other's bedroom at night and get freaky and finally it's a good place to have your own space especially when you're sick.

Particularly if you go to the partners bed and leave s/he to cope with the cold damp bedding/mattress after you have returned to your warm dry bed. Hehe

I tend to toss and turn a lot, so I think at the very least separate beds would work best, but I have no bedroom big enough for two beds! lol So it would have to be separate bedrooms.

I don't do so much turning lol. on a serious note, i think separate houses would be good too.

I couldn't agree more. There is nothing romantic about sleep deprivation.

@LeighShelton I was going to add that because I know Tim Burton and his actress wife have separate houses that are connected so they go to each other's houses and they even have children. If I were Rich Maybe. As far as my ex-husband goes he lives in a separate State LOL.

@FrayedBear it's called a towel everybody has them and you can lay them down and lay on top of them. Little sex tip there for you LOL.

@SonderOpia LOL and unlike some wives they don't whinge!


I’m an introvert and need my space and quiet time. I’d like an extra bedroom for when I just need to be alone. But I would more often than not sleep in the same bed as my partner. I’d like options lol

I'm an extrovert and still like to have my own space.


In a perfect world with a big house I think two rooms would be ideal. We could spend the night in each others rooms together mostly, but still be able to have the whole bed once in a while.

MsAl Level 7 Jan 25, 2018

While sharing a bed is my preference we frequently do not sleep in the same house. It works at the moment.


Intimacy sleeping in the same bed.

I always said that naked bodies sleeping together are less likely to lie to each other ... how naive can I be!

@FrayedBear I always say naked bodies that lay together in the heat in Texas end up sticking together. Boy was I right.

@SonderOpia Big chuckle: may I suggest that in future you add coconut oil to each others skin by gently rubbing it on each other immediately on entering the place that nirvana is to be found. If you are not keen on the smell of coconut try adding aromatic oil to it ....lavender, lilac, rose, lemon etc.
P.S. use a thick cotton mattress protector under the sheet. And if I have "converted" you please let me know. 🙂

@SonderOpia P.S. I thought that you are separated/divorced? 🙂

@FrayedBear. I'm divorced not Dead.

@SonderOpia I should hope so. I'm not into necrophilia! 🙂


Same room, same bed, enjoy a fall asleep cuddle, birthday suits.


My caveat being it has been a very long time since I slept with anyone that didn't have a fur coat and weigh more than 11 pounds. My preference when I was in a relationship was same bed and start the night snuggling. It has been so long since I've had a sleep over I don't know if I would be able to sleep with someone anymore. The cats I am used to, and unless they're fighting on top of me I don't notice them.

My friend's cat sleeps on her head. I couldn't deal with that. I'm allergic to cats in the first place but to have an animal sleep on my head like a headband would just freak me out.

@SonderOpia many years ago I had a cat that would sleep on my head like a hat. I would wake up drenched in sweat!! Just what you need to help you sleep, a hat with a heater.

@HippieChick58 My old girl learnt long ago to stay off the pillows. When off grid and in mid winter it was a delight to discover a furry hot water bottle snuck under the doona and keeping my feet warm. Now it is a delight to have her warm back to my back in winter. In summer she won't come near which is just as well as I still sometimes have problems from anaesthetics damaging my temperature control.


Damn, I voted wrong, now that I think about it more, sleeping alone is much more fun.


My last cohabitat has a routine with 7 pillows and one male cat with no space for me. So cuddling will have expiration time. Big house, many rooms and baseman is cozy enough with TV and PC. Plus I am just like many others here in need of space and alone time. I am retired so I feel at home waking up at 3 AM turn on the light and start working on something I been doing. When ever inspiration comes to me I should embrace it. That is why I retired for, Haven't used a wristwatch in 4 years I think. Now the Right Woman can twist my arm and make me Tired if that is what she prefer. Anything for the ladies. The Right Ladies. Now having said that... You had never cuddled until your pregnant wife kicks you in the Nuts sleeping and tells you "I was dreaming that we have an argument and I warned you to cut it out and you didn't assohole".

ROFL Is it any wonder blokes join monasteries? Good organic food, simple regulated life, home brewed beer, wine and spirits ....

@FrayedBear Plus the nuns... always the nuns.

@GipsyOfNewSpain I believe that in Buddhist countries men joining monastries are a well known method of divorce and avoiding child maintenance.

@GipsyOfNewSpain Is that to service or have similar opportunity?🙂

@FrayedBear Service... holy men need service.

@GipsyOfNewSpain ROFL


Short cuddles first, then roll over and sleep kind of like separate beds, except maybe a foot or butt to butt.


I've been told that I talk in my sleep and I believe it. No offense taken on that "different rooms" option.

How often were you blackmailed over your nocturnal revelations?

@FrayedBear never. I can say that I also fight in my sleep. I don't know what subconscious me is doing but apparently he doesn't want anybody to know 😛


Depends on how fat and farty the two people are

Nay lad. Bed size, cuisine/ digestive system and sense of smell.


Warmth, energy efficient and nice.


Same room, same bed especially Naked


I am a freak, apart from anything else, body temp is a degree higher than average, I never feel cold, and can't sleep when hot. No-one can share a bed with me in summer, but I am quite popular in winter. I tend to start in the same bed, but after a while I move to another room. I am in my spare room at the moment, laptop in front of me and spare bed behind me. A friend arrived this afternoon and has put her bags in my room, she knows she will end up with the big bed all to herself, but my dog sleeps in there also, and farts in her sleep.


same room but different beds.I don't like fighting for covers and bed space. When i am in the mood then we can collaborate

@evestrat i am trying to be politically correct thank you !! lol 😉

@evestrat lol i trying to be all proper and all lol

It's been awhile for me since I collaborated with anyone. I need to collaborate soon LOL can you self collaborate?

@SonderOpia lol absolutely and with your own bed it will not break your concentration 😉

@SonderOpia LOL no that's another ...ate word beginning with an "m"

@FrayedBear right!

@twshield 🙂🙂🙂


I think it depends. With a past girlfriend I had it seemed to work best when we slept in different cities.

good one !


Sleeping in the same bed lets you be on patrol to catch the blanket bandit who has been leaving people out in the cold for eons. I have a person of interest, time to go undercover.



Warmth, energy efficient and nice.


Warmth, energy efficient and nice.

This comment showed up 3 times.

@SonderOpia my bad, probably fat finger syndrome.


I would do what makes the most sense for comfort for both of us, but if I had a partner with whom I was living I'd want to sleep in the same bed.


Of course, if you want to.


I like my own space.


I am very big on physical contact. Not just sex but touching.


Many years ago (30?) I read a book by an American nurse of her experience of raising her children with her husband withh the familly sleeping together in a communal bedroom which was just one big mattress. Whilst trying to track it down on the internet just now I came across the following interesting article which may help some people:

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