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To sleep together or to not sleep together?

What one would you rather do with your significant other or spouse?

  • 77 votes
  • 2 votes
  • 24 votes
SonderOpia 8 Jan 25
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44 comments (26 - 44)

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1

I like to sleep together because I like to cuddle.

1

The differences between theories, fantasies and reality make this very difficult to answer. There are great reasons for all possibilities. There have been many times I wished I could temporarily detach one of my arms that was in the way.

1

I'm pro sleeping in the same bed. But it needs to be a big bed. I have a kings size...major brand foam mattress. To cuddle you have to be intentional. You can meet in the middle, cuddle and kiss and then retreat to you're own side if or when you wish. The foam mattress doesn't transfer motion and doesn't creak/squeak if you toss and turn (I do) or if you fall off the beam or fail to stick the landing.

1

Hey, if they're up for it, I'm up for it.

1

I think it would depend on the other person, whether or not you can endure each other's sleep peculiarities. My last partner snored so loud, it would either keep me awake, or wake me up. I have very sensitive hearing, and have worn earplugs to bed for almost 20 years. So, I had to move to another room to get enough sleep; it was becoming a health issue for me. At any rate, I think that move accelerated the deterioration of the relationship.

You think sharing different rooms deteriorated your relationship? My best friend and her husband have been sharing separate rooms for multiple years and they've been together for 18 years now. Maybe there was a problem with your relationship in the first place that was so bad that nothing would have saved it.

@SonderOpia yeah, there definitely was, that's why I said accelerated rather than caused.

1

I am an affectionate man and I prefer contact all night. I even prefer to go to sleep with my partner lying on top of me.

I've not heard of anybody liking someone falling asleep on top of them. This is something new to me. Thanks for sharing.

1

Is nice to feel someone next to you. Winter warmth. In the warmer month those hot nights sweating with passion.

1

It appears we're well on our way to a consensus here.

1

My parents had separate bedrooms and I always thought it was a little odd. My mother had restless leg syndrome that kept my stepdad awake so it worked for them. During my 25 year marriage we almost always slept in the same bed but I’ll admit it was not easy. I can remember going to bed at the same time and praying, yes praying, to let me fall asleep first because once the snoring started I knew I was not going to sleep. There were nights when I’d drag my tired ass to the couch finally. I do enjoy cuddling and knowing someone is there but when it’s time to sleep I totally enjoy sleeping by myself.

1

When it comes to actual sleep, I do much better sleeping alone (with cats).

With different beds, or different rooms - visits are always possible, and add a certain specialness to the occasion !

Great answer. It is nice to have a spare room just in case.

1

That is a tricky one because if he snores really loud.. I am fairly light sleeper, it will keep me up all night.. I have dealt with this and I was sick all the time because of lack of sleep...so dammed if you do.dammed if you don't.

1

I'm torn between the first and last options. Ideally, I think you should try to spend the night in the same bed, but there should be an escape option if it doesn't work out on that particular night. And yes, it's nice to have space to yourself sometimes.

My long term ex and I (together for 17 years) always shared a bed. Even once she'd declared that she was leaving, and we were no longer in a relationship, we still shared the same room and bed while she was finding somewhere else to live. Sometimes her snoring would keep me awake. Other times, mine would do the same to her. We got by, largely through falling asleep with the television on.

My more recent ex (together for just over a year) evolved from us sharing a bed, to him crashing in the spare room because he couldn't sleep with my snoring. We'd typically start out in the same bed, and then once I'd gone to sleep, he'd sneak out to the other room. We did manage to fall asleep and wake up in the same bed quite often, though.

An even more recent one only got to the 'staying over' point once. His snoring was like someone mated an industrial threshing machine with Darth Vader. I managed to get some kip after remembering the old 'telly on' trick. He had a bit of a meltdown and declared he couldn't handle being in a relationship, shortly after that.

1

Based on current situation, separate rooms.

1

Hell my wife ran me out of the bedroom over 30 years ago. She says I snore to bad.

I'm a mover and Shaker when I sleep. I just can't stay in one place and sleep. I am all over the place.

1

It's just a norm, but I prefer to be in the same bed. Experts say not to sleep with dogs because it disturbs your sleep, and I don't see why it should be any different with a human, but I'd prefer to just by a really big bed, that way if one of us gets the urge to lay really close to the other, we don' have to get out of bed and potentially sleep in one tinier bed together.

1

sharing is great, but my snoring.......

1

Don't own a pair of pajamas, have the personal space of a cat and like the sound of someone else breathing (even snoring). Unless it's fake an orgasm, wait until they are asleep then chew off you own arm to get out of there without waking them time, I'll happily share a bed. Even share a friends double with her as she only has one bed whenever I stay at her place.

Kimba Level 7 Jan 25, 2018

I own a pair of pajamas because I still go to Walmart LOL.

@SonderOpia Never having been to Wal-Mart your remark zips over me. You go to the supermarket in your pj's?

@FrayedBear it's a joke. Walmart has some of the most amazing people show up in anything from pajamas to swimsuits to other bizarre things.

@SonderOpia Pj's are very respectable compared to some photos I have seen of people with flesh (?fat) and other body parts escaping from as you say "bizarre things ". Thanks for the clarification.
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I'm sure that you look very desirable in silk pj's and the kinesthetic sensation can be delightful for both parties. 🙂

@FrayedBear I would never go out shopping in my pajamas but if I did I would be one sexy bitch. LOL oh there's a website called the people of walmart.com you have to check that out you'll understand totally when I'm talking about.

1

I've been in all 3 situations , so I'm versatile enough to go with any of the above . It would take time to get used to another way when your used to another though , even if your used to having someone there , it can keep you awake if no one is there . I knew of a situation where someone took in a Hindi missionary couple . When he left for work away , it was her custom to to have another woman sleep with her , & says she has never slept alone , ever .

Dougy Level 7 Jan 25, 2018

I've never heard of that. Thanks for the info. Then again I've never slept with a girl 😉 I'm sure I'm missing out however.

@SonderOpia , she slept with her mother & her sisters , & they always snuggled , something that friend of mine did not do , in fact , she couldn't accommodate sleeping with her , after she found out .

0

I love sleeping together, but as long as we want to. Im into having separate rooms and privacy, that way you have the option to sleep alone and I think it gives a better value to sleep together. it also changes the perspective when you decide to sleep in your room or hers, it makes it feel more fun. Last its also important to have your space where you can go whenever you want.

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