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Transgender and Bathrooms

Have you noticed that even mens bathrooms have stalls?
The urinals face the wall and other than Trump I don't know anyone who want's to watch people pee so explain to me why all bathrooms aren't unisex.
It's because men are disgusting isn't it.

Do we really need separate sex bathrooms? If it's all stalls does it really matter who's in the stall next to you?

The only time I care is when I see a line for the women room and feel lucky to be a man.

ThomasLevi 6 Jan 29
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24 comments

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9

It doesn't make that much sense to have separate facilities. I think it has more to do with irrational fears and individual "comfort", than it does with anything else.
I've been known to use the men's restroom when the line for the women's was longer than I could wait. I ain't skeered.

5

I was in Asheville, NC, shortly after North Carolina passed its ill-fated HB2 bathroom bill. I noticed during my visits to a number of South Slope craft breweries that there would be no problem at most of them because their bathrooms were not only marked as in the illustration above, but they were also one-holers. One World Brewery, because of its inclusive diversity message, also included the trans icon along with the male and female. I asked about this at several breweries, wondering if they had made a quick transition to avoid problems. No, they said, they have always been like that, mostly to avoid lines at some bathrooms and not at others.

Unisex one-holers would render the bathroom "problem" a non-issue, and the Thumpers would then have to find somebody else to discriminate against.

Oh no..they're hell bent on dehumamizing my community.. So if it ain't pee it'll be some other ridiculous issue..

4

In one of the grocery stores here, there are two small restrooms marked according to gender. They are side by side and identical in layout, each containing a toilet (no urinal), baby-changing table, and sink. I've been observing more and more people using them interchangably, since there's no appreciable difference in the two. Management should just remove the signs altogether, IMHO. No-one really cares, judging from their actions. They're more concerned about being able to get in and get out and doing their business in a clean facility.

4

Many restrooms up here are unisex because we don't have the space or money to make two or more restrooms. You are correct about the stalls. Transgenders are not anybody's problem except for religionist perverts who wish to belittle them. Woman have a point about the seats, but men could sit just as easily if they don't wish to put the seat up and clean it up after using.

I could not agree with you more. My fiance used to sit down and I admit that I thought it was odd. In hindsight, it was smart, clean, quieter and probably comfortable. Now, I would prefer a male partner to sit down, but apparently that is not "manly."

@BlueWave Not only manly, but easier to empty your bladder than standing up trying to control things through a few layers of clothing. Real men don't make women sit on dirty toilet seats!

@Dwight Your "than" has thrown me off. Which way is easier to empty the bladder?

@BlueWave sitting. I used the comparative "than" to compare the implied act of sitting with the stated act of standing and using the fly to access the male appendage. Sorry for the grammar lesson but I hope this makes my point a little better(no pun intended)

@Dwight Okay, got it - sitting is easier. As an aside, read your sentence from the beginning. "Not only manly, but easier to empty your bladder than standing...." When I said manly, I was referring to sitting not being "manly." What do you mean by "Not only manly..."?

@BlueWave yes, it does create confusion. My bad. Sometimes I think the spell checker word completion do everything except make the coffee keyboard takes my fat fingers for a ride!

Women can just as easily put it down and then up as men could put it up and then down. Never understood why the moving of the seat is solely the man's responsibility. Technically if everyone was responsible for putting the seat in their own desired configuration, there would statistically be less total moves of the seat necessary. How has society not figured this out yet?

3

Yeah..I just really want to pee..then wash my hands and leave..like you I could careless what someone else is doing in Their stall..

3

More than once, I've ducked into a men's room. when the women's line was way too long ...

I care far more about the cleanliness of a bathroom, than about which humans are using it !

One of my fondest memories, was in the dressing room of a theatre, where all the actors changed. The toilet was broken - so I brought a 5 gal bucket, and we used that ! Adaptability !

More then once I have walked into and used the women bathroom without realizing it, only to wonder at the lack of urinals as I was leaving or was greeted by snickering as I walked out the door.
Such is life.
But then I have 4 sisters so I have always shared a bathroom with women.

3

My then-husband and I went with a friend to a gay/lesbian bar in Houston, TX. When I went to use the bathroom I walked into a massive amount of stalls with both men and women. It was a shock at first, then I just went and done my business. After all, it's just pee (and occasionally poo)

3

I don't know but my guess is it has to do with the many sexual hangups humanity has. Boobs in public are great for trying to sell us stuff, but boobs in public to feed a child? Unacceptable. I was once at a concert and the line was so long for the women's restroom, they started using the men's. Nobody made a big deal of it.

I will not hesitate to at least attempt to go in a men's bathroom. If it is tolerable (in terms of smell/cleanliness), that's where I'm going. A few times I've had to turn around and wait for the women's. But, there also have been times that the women's restroom is just as disgusting and I won't use it.

@BlueWave I was going to say. I used to clean restrooms. Women's was sometimes worse

2

PLEASE. I work in live theatre and architects just don't seem to get that enough bathrooms for 1500 people who use them over two hours is not enough for 1500 who've got twenty minutes to pee, grab a drink and get back to their seats. Unisex would ease part of the problem.

2

Hi Thomas, As a man, I was slightly embarrassed on a visit to France, and making use of an open toilet, to have a number of women walk past me during my performance. Not what I was used to.

I have four sisters so I grew up with that. My wife used to be embarrassed walking in on me because I didn't lock the door. To me it's not much different than if guy walks in on me.

2

Some people are perverts, separate sex bathrooms havn't stopped those people from doing inappropriate perverted things. I have no problem with trans people. I have a problem with some trans people's views. Just like anyone else. (I use preverted as a place holder for sex offender, I'm not shaming anyone's sexuality, as long as it's between consenting adults.)

2

Some of my college’s dorms/dorm halls voted to make bathrooms (which included showers) unisex, or to flip the bathrooms’ gender use midsemester so neither boys nor girls had to be stuck all year or semester with a location farthest from their rooms.

The result? Mixed bathrooms felt so awkward that people used them quickly and did more grooming in their rooms, leading to less crowding. And if a bathroom originally for men was used only by women, sometimes the urinals were turned into planters.

2

I think it has more to do with people feeling vulnerable when the go to the bathroom because their genitals are exposed. Think about the harassment people experience on the street while fully clothed. Now imagine those same people (those harassed, and those harassing) practically removing their underwear only feet from each other.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not anti-trans, and I don't believe trans people are more likely to harass or assault. I'm just pointing out why some people are opposed to unisex bathrooms.

2

Never give it much thought... but you sound right.

1

I'm just sick of driving, stopping at a gas station, and theres 3 guys in line for the mens room, and none at the ladies. Go up, knock on door, test handle, it opens, call in, get no answer, open, its empty, ask the 1st guy in line if he wants in, they all 3 look at you like your a zombie.. so I go in.
THEN they find their balls and start yelling stuff thru the door.

What does it matter if it's a single occupant restroom? Who cares what genitals you have? It's a waste removal activity, it's not sexual. Can we just mark all single user washrooms with a question mark and let there be ONE line?

I'd like a 3rd room, that is mandatory by law that anyone in line in a wheelchair or crutches gets first dibs on. Otherwise, it's also fair game.

Angus Level 5 June 19, 2018

I've used the "Ladies" room many times. Sometimes by accident, sometimes by necessity and sometimes for convenience and sometimes due to impatience.

It's a bathroom, everyone has used a unisex bathroom and there is little difference. Not too many people who need to use the bathroom are looking to see anything and those looking to see something will not be stopped by any law or ordinance trying to keep them out. And more likely than not, anyone going into a bathroom hoping to get off on what they see is more likely a man looking for young boys not little girls or women, JMO.

1

ok so this wasnt always the case, ive known some very clean fellows as well, but when i used to work fast food and clean the restrooms, the guys room was usually worse. but i will say it seemed like just little things they didnt think about that added up, whereas if it was the ladies room that was nastiest, you could tell it was done on purpose. crap smeered on walls, paper towels stuffed in the toilet, toilet overflowing, they were pissed about something and they were lashing out. honestly tho, i couldnt possibly care less what you have in your nether regions. just don't be a creep, that goes for everybody.

Byrd Level 7 Apr 21, 2018
1

I'm fairly certain it's simply a hold over from America's Protestant beginnings.

1

I remember the bathrooms in a old movie theater. There were independent stalls each with it's own sink. I think we should go back to this! It was awesome and completely rids you of any need for separate quarters - also roomy enough for handicapping. - As someone with handicapped issues I'll be darn happy when every low toilet has a grab bar on the wall. Well ok any toilet. Not everyone is my height. I mean the interaction at the women's room mirror area would be missed - I've had some great conversations with people overhearing each others convos... but I can live without that.

1

The whole notion of 'safe spaces' is ridiculous. They actually create unsafe spaces. If a predatory male enters a female only space, he can be fairly confident that there will be no other males in there to confront him. We're talking about someone who's intent on sexual assault here. He isn't going to let a sign on a door keep him out.

The public bathroom situation is a funny one. Nobody seems to mind unisex toilets,as long as they're completely self-contained units, complete with hand washing facilities. The issues seem to be stalls that don't go all of the way to the floor or ceiling, and communal hand washing facilities.At that point, people suddenly begin to have a massive problem with penises and vaginas coexisting in the same space.

1

Meh, tough call, but I'm ok with unisex. I think Europe has a lot of unisex, no?

One thing's for sure - this component of the political right's argument to the effect of "allowing trans people into their identity bathroom is going to lead to more sexual assaults of little girls" is patently absurd - because a hetero man (who happens to be a perv / criminal) can already dress up like a woman and go into the ladies room if that's his M.O. to facilitate his assault! So the law changes nothing in that respect - no increased risk there.

I am an outlier with many things, especially in America. I think women would feel safer in a Unisex bathroom because any guy bold enough to go after a woman in a bathroom might think twice if he knows another guy might walk in.
And airport security. Personally I think the TSA is a billboard saying "The terrorist won, we handed them this trophy and we chose to make America worse so they can feel good about their victory over our freedom". In some ways I would feel safer knowing people could have guns, or at least knives for the freedom to just get on a plane without being searched, spending extra hours at the airport and letting friends and family greet me at the gate. The security at airports makes about as much sense as forcing people to use a particular bathroom.

1

" Give me liberty or at least my own bathroom "????????????????????????????

1

Yes, it's because for some reason many men appear to tend to think that other people want to see, smell or sit in their urine.

Ugh......

I went over to a friend's the other day -- they have one ADULT son and one teen son. The guest bathroom had urine ON the seat. WTF? If that were my house, they would clean up after themselves or they would not have a bathroom. Period. But, guess who cleans that bathroom? Yup, the mama.

1

Having all genders in the same place would have some challenges. Some men like to flash their junk at women, apparently thinking women like to see them, much as they like to see naked women, so doing as the Thai do, with a low wall blocking the view of the urinals from the stalls and sinks would be helpful.

There's still the problem of many men leaving a stinky mess, as married women already know, although they usually can make their spouses behave.

I would guess that men married to men would also know that. 😉

@BlueWave I might be prejudiced, but most gay men I know are more fastidious than I am.

0

The problem is individual privacy and security. Stalls don't offer enough of either. The whole idea of having such bathrooms, as far as I can tell, is that it's easier and more economical to have all the plumbing fixtures in a single location. This can still be achieved while also making individual lockable restrooms.

Have you never seen a floor to ceiling stall? They are out there and even if they weren't they are easy to make.

@ThomasLevi I've never seen one. I'm not convinced it would be enough at a psychological level.

@bingst I've seen them in many places. Some airport seem to have ones that go pretty close to top and bottom, there is usually just enough space for mopping the floors. Though you are correct, most people (Americans) are not mature enough to handle it.

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