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QUESTION Atheists Are Brainwashed By The Scientific Method

A new study reveals an overwhelming percentage of atheists are brainwashed. These so-called skeptics, humanists, and Satanists stopped submitting to the faith of their fathers only to put on the yoke of servitude to the scientific method.
The study titled The Enslavement Of Freethinkers by Professor Andrew Canard was recently published in the Journal of Crytpointelligence. Professor Canard teaches at the Theological Institute of Technology (TIT). His courses include Cryptoepistemology and Alex Jones I and II. The professor is a longtime skeptic of skeptics and their methodology:
My new study shows atheists are brainwashed by the scientific method. A full 83% of atheists take it on faith that the process of systematically testing hypotheses by vigorous methods and getting results capable of getting replicated is the best way of knowing about the world.
5,307 self-identified atheists answered questions exploring their sad and atheistically miserable lives. Even though 88% state they lead happy and fulfilled lives only . 5% go to church regularly. “That’s a clear sign atheists don’t know what happiness is. How can you know if you’re spiritually fulfilled if you’re not in church regularly?” pointed out Professor Canard.

Dougy 7 Jan 30
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61 comments (26 - 50)

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2

LMFAO. What the he'll.? There is so much wrong with that,,, where to start ? " take it on faith that testing a hypothosis is the best way ,,,,," well I guess I am brainwashed then because I want evidence. I' d rather be brainwashed by the scientific method than by a doctrine of blind faith in an imaginary sky daddy.

1

He sounds mentally-ill. This is a pathetic attempt to keep us as mental slaves. I think some nut was debating me with that Scientific Method. But, he still couldn't prove God exists. I shut him up. We were born Atheists. And, will die that way.

If you look into the article's links , you'll see that it is intended as satire . This is Secular humor .

1

O|o

..and then I saw the #sarcasm tag

Lolz

4

When I read this in the linked article, I knew I'd found my people, "When asked if astrology is a good way of predicting the future, 80% of atheists state the age old practice is as useful as “tits on a penguin.”

4

Thankfully, that's satire. But I didn't know that before reading the comments or clicking the link! I thought the trolliest of trolls had infiltrated our group! My head almost exploded!

2

The word "brainwashed" is incendiary and implies something unnatural. The Scientific Method is objective, rigorous, and based on observation of nature.

The scientific method is always skeptical. After repeated observation and measurement, someone proposes a theory. Then, others attempt to disprove the theory. Other scientists are free to accept or reject the theory. As time goes on, with the accumulated results if attempts to prove or disprove the theory, the theory gains or loses acceptance.

Religious people have great problems with Scientific Method. Objectivity, observation, scepticism, and uncertainty are abhorrent to those who blindly believe without evidence.

Whoever uses the term "brainwashed" to describe adherents to the Scientific Method is a jackass. I invite any-and-all objective observers to prove or disprove my statement. I choose to believe the Jackass theory until it can be disproven.

If you look into the article's links , you'll see that it is intended as satire . This is Secular humor .

1

Atheists are brainwashed with the truth by scientists because they present the undeniable facts,
Scientists do not deal in mythical fairy tales. It is quite quaint to have the faithful believe that some very clever guy only took 7 days to create the universe................. Bravo !........splendid effort.

3

My brother believes Alex Jones is a better journalist than Rachel Maddow. Now this is some very frightful material

EMC2 Level 8 Jan 31, 2018

If you look into the article's links , you'll see that it is intended as satire . This is Secular humor .

No offense, but your brother needs help.

1

Love it.

🙂

1

83% take it on faith ? The process of testing hypothesis by vigorous methods etc. is because we don't have faith!!! As far as being happy? I am sooooo happy that I don't believe in the delusions of grandeur that you Christians eat up like candy! The Ideology of a primate Skygod has been peddled by shucksters ,for profit, since the beginning of Mankind!! I'll keep my Titheings for myself!!! Thank you!!!!

If you look into the article's links , you'll see that it is intended as satire . This is Secular humor .

2

Troll alert.

If you look into the article's links , you'll see that it is intended as satire . This is Secular humor .

2

Where did they find this whackjob, Satanists? Atheists don't believe in Satan, doesnt he know that????

Satanists don't believe in Satan either. To them he represents rebellion against religious doctrine, freedom to think for oneself, and responsibility for one's own actions. Satanists aren't the devout cultists you were led to believe they are.

@JimG I know nothing about Satanists but I do know I don't believe in Satan any more than I believe in God.

1

Is he seriou... Are you serious...?

2

The humor..It is to laugh.

That is the point of humor, is it not?

@JimG Sarcasm Font: ON

2

You’ve stated nothing but opinion. I find nothing to be “happy or fulfilled” about at church where blind faith leaves its believers vulnerable to exploitation. I like to try to prove my theories wrong. It’s my way of learning and learning makes me happy. Doubt is a right that provides a true sense of security.

0

"...take it on faith that the process of systematically testing hypotheses by vigorous methods and getting results capable of getting replicated is the best way of knowing about the world."

That's not true.

We state correctly that it's the best way we know of so far. And we know that by comparing the methods put forward so far to each other. The scientific method stands alone. There is a reason history changes so abruptly with its discovery.

1

The "Yoke of Servitude" of the SM? It's a gift of freedom. It's a challenge to reproduce research. It's an ability to admit you were wrong and accept criticism. It's a challenge of being exact and precise. It's an expectation of data and details.

But I don't see a "Yoke of servitude"...

In fact, if anyone has a yoke, it's the religious, it's the under-educated, it's those brought up to think that males determine when women are to be impregnated. It's those who "trust" in the words of a very good and giving leader - Jesus - but who mis-interpreted his words, and the "interpretations" of his followers, about a god. I'm Christ-like....but I've divorced from "Christianity"...and free from that "yoke"....

Glad to hear it , but lust to let you know , the article is a poe.

1

I think proving a negative is part of the satire of the article. I thought it was aserious article at first. Is that an indication of lack of faith in my own stance? LOL

More like a lack in faith of those with faith in religion to have reason on the subject 😉

2

Canard, huh? From the Theological Institute of Technology. Funny, but it's a bit of an oxymoron.

JimG Level 8 Feb 8, 2018
1

The religious are brainwashed by mythology, ghosts, and things that go bump in the night. Atheist follow the path of inquiry, asking questions, researching, collecting data, and citing real-evidence not ghosts, myths, or deep feelings. We also most certainly know how to be happy without going to a house of lies. This is BS!

The article is a spoof , or poe from Laughing in disbelief , like The Onion . I put it under Silly Random & Fun , but categories don't seem to be highlighted much here , so I stopped posting them . Thanks for staking a stand with reason 😉

1

LMAO. I want to study at TIT! 96.0000375% of people who take statistics there are dedicated crypto-epistemologists but only 3.14% of non-atheists can decode their work.

If you look into the article's links , you'll see that it is intended as satire . This is Secular humor .

@Douglas There is a 100% chance I knew that before I read the whole post.

1

Its hard to find happiness in a trickle down slavery system. The best you can do is live by example and try to help those around you. Does anyone really know what happiness is anyways? Most the time people are just trying to be comfortable in their own skin. You wanna talk about brainwashed? #LiesOfReligion

If you look into the article's links , you'll see that it is intended as satire . This is Secular humor .

1

How does that work if I am an artist and haven't a scientific bone in my body and I can reassure you that I am a truly happy soul and it does rather seem that you are the one spreading the misery here - I am sorry for that theres a whole beautiful world out there to play - try to stop your moping and play in it.

As an artist , you will appreciate the fact that this article is a Poe .

1

It's quite funny once you see it that way.

JohnQ Level 3 Feb 23, 2018
0

I laugh because It’s amusing, but also I’m sad because prople are stupid.

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