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Standards

I had an interesting conversation today and it made me curious.

Mostly directed at male identifying people but anyone can answer

Those of you over 30, do you notice you are pickier about people you will hook up with?

If a women says I want to have sex now but she isn't attractive are you still going to have sex with her?

#sex
Holyhellkel 6 Feb 12
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42 comments

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0

I once did. It was then I realized I probably had a problem.

3

Its been a few years for me, but she should be at least a little attractive.

3

I suppose it would depend on how I feel at the time. I found that as I've gotten older I have gotten pickier. Also if a random person came up to me asking to have sex I would question what their real motivation was as that might seem to be to good to be true.

OK, a random person coming up and asking for sex? Never happens with people in their right mind. Crazy in lust because you are so gorgeous? That's more likely.

@Spinliesel
People in their right mind no. Between 2am and 4am at the gay bar yes.

@Chris_aka_C2 Good to know. Thanks, Chris!

2

In 47 years of life I've never had a woman come up to me and say that so I can't test your hypothesis. It'd be cool if it happend though!

4

never happened to me. would be fun finding out !

3

When I was younger, I was not too picky. I did too much of my thinking with the little head rather than my brain. Sex was the only think the little head thought about. Now, I am older and hopefully wiser, I want more than sex. I would rather be with someone that can hold an intelligent and stimulating conversation with me. She has to be smart, and be able to think for herself. Some years ago I turned away from a gorgeous woman, and turned down an offer to have sex with her after I got to know her. I dated her for a while and I did not want to jump in bed with her right away. I just lost interest in her due to her character. No one was more surprised than me when it happened.

2

I guess I am beyond that point. Now, I wish that I had not turned down those invitations.

2

For some odd reason I have found that I'm less picky about who I would date. But that's just been my experience. I don't doubt what you're saying is true. Some people probably do get more picky.

3

Hasn't happened to me...but if it did, it would go beyond any physical attraction. It would certainly never happen without knowing the woman first; her personality, her ambitions, her values. For me, sex is a mutual sharing, an exposing of one's most intimate, personal self, and not just knockin' boots in a rented hotel room. A person's beauty is on the inside, not the outside, and as they grow older [and 'lose their looks'] that becomes a lot more evident. There are a lot of beautiful people I would never even remotely consider having sex with, and a lot of beautiful souls whom I would...

0

If any woman wanted to have sex, that would be a no go for me.

3

But I am glad I'm picky. Men have to be attractive, but not ridiculously so.

11

Nope. Always been "picky". Not about looks, money, prestige. About intelligence, personality, values. Sorry, not sorry. I like having "high standards."

2

I am very picky about who I will spend my time with these days, whether or not sex is involved. Life is full of obligations and demands on my time. I am quick to write off anyone that demands too much without giving back... life really is just too short.

2

I am pickier. I've been on the market a long time and I've had to deal with a lot of shit so I deserve to be picky. I don't date much anymore but that's because I really don't like what's out there and I have a more than healthy disdain for the dating community at any rate. The only difference between now and when I was younger was when I was younger I had no options and no dates. Now I have plenty of options but I don't exactly like the options that have presented themselves. In the end dating as a means of distraction or whatever is pretty fucking dumb

3

I am 79. Probably this thread is not relevant to my life 🙂

0

First every woman has an attraction and if I was to agree to having sex with her it would depend on the mood I would be in

0

Her attitude is about the only thing I notice or am attracted to anymore.

2

I've never had sex with someone I wasn't attracted to.

3

I was picky then and I’m picky now.

0

I only want to have sex with women I love. My standards like you said.

0

No. Sex is not a hobby. I need a real connection for the sex to be any good. When I masturbate I prefer to be alone. Thanks but no thanks. I kinda wish I had to turn more down more often b/c it is nice to be appreciated.

0

I would like to believe I am less easy now compared to the past.

1

There's a saying. if she's a lady treat her like a lady if not fuck her. obviously, that goes both ways. there's nothing wrong with adults having fuck buddies or very short flings but the emphasis would be just on how attractive they were really. it's not my ideal situation as I prefer much longer deeper relationships which means trust, respect, caring, intelligence and things in common and best friends to me and more I can't think of. I have to be attracted to the outside however and sometimes that isn't instant though you are drawn for other reasons as well as sex.thats just my opinion. I've had one night stands right threw to 14 years but the one-offs were when I was young so I guess I am more picky. I would rather be on my own than with the wrong person hence being on my own.

3

Dang! So I am probably going to sound old fashioned, but I am not the typical guy I suppose. I am pickier about women. I am more interested in my ability to talk to her than what she looks like. Although I won't say that looks don't mean anything to me. Having said that, I am not quick to jump in bed with someone. First meet, I would be inclined to say no regardless of how she looks. Of course, I have not been put in that situation yet. So maybe that has a lot to do with it. I don't necessarily feel comfortable with a women who wants sex before anything else. If that makes sense.

1

Had a better selection to choose from when I was young and still say no more than I say yes but have a healthy appetite so more willing to give something a try, you never know they may surprise you and the pickings are slim where I live.

Hell I've even had a one night stand with a travelling salesman, how cliched can you get. Dead fussy about who gets seconds though.

Kimba Level 7 Feb 12, 2018
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