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How do you deal with people who like to argue?

EmeraldJewel 7 Dec 16

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Ignore them, I prefer a debate of intellectual stimulation. If someone wants to argue especially when curse words start to fly I get more tight-lipped.


It really depends on whether the other person actually knows HOW to argue properly.


Divorce worked for me.


Worked for me too!!


Depends on who is doing the arguing and how important it is to me to defend my position on an issue. I choose my battles carefully. If someone is just arguing for the sake of being argumentative, I ignore them.

Deb57 Level 8 Dec 16, 2018

I use my leadership skills: I listen, identify the problem, and work on resolving the issue. No matter how little the problem. Or I'll try my best.

(Depending on the issue, and how it affects me directly, of course.) Otherwise, I might have to channel out my ninja skills. Know what I mean, Gene? Hehehe... kidding on the last part. Maybe????

Chronic arguers are not interested in solving a problem they are interested in expressing their own disturbed emotions


I keep asking why until they get tired of talking. lol


The Five Why's of why I am single. Beautiful!


I leave them in the dust.


No one can keep an argument going by themselves... I refuse to be on the other side of their volley net !

Also - it's good to be clear whether it's a pointless argument, or a civil, and potentially useful debate.


I don't. I turn around and walk away.


Well I'm someone who likes to argue, so if you don't want to argue with me I'd suggest just not responding. It would piss me off personally but eventually I would wander off to yell at someone on the internet or to grumble to myself while cleaning dishes.


I believe what I believe and I do not have to justify myself to anyone...


Mostly I avoid them. With a personal relationship, family or friend I like to keep it as a conversation/ discussion but sometimes it can escalate to an argument, in that case, I just try to end it and if necessary walk away. If I feel responsible for the escalation, I will apologize. But there are some hot topics that I will just plain avoid.


I avoid them


Wait outside and run over them with my truck.



It takes two(or more) to argue, so if you don't want to argue then don't argue.

When living with others it does not always work that way. "He just won't stop. He follows me all over the house. He won't shut up,....."

This is not an easy issue.

Plus, one person’s argument is another’s discussion.


It depends on the topic and how well the other side's argument is constructed. I hate arguing with stupid people. But with someone reasonably intelligent, making a reasonable argument, I often enjoy them.

P.S. I think I am one of those. People who like to argue. But I want to argue well, not make declaratory statements and dumb personal attacks (but I do have to admit that I have done them too....)

@KenChang Ditto!


I walk away. Through online dating, I met a man who loved to argue. He thought it was fun. I dumped his combative, contrary ass.

I want a kind, respectful man, not someone who enjoys upsetting me.


I listen to what they have to say, refute any misinformation they may have and find common ground with them on the parts that we do agree on. Lather, rinse, repeat until either they and I are on the same page, they exhaust themselves, or they walk away frustrated that they couldn't get the typical reaction that they expected, which is that they will browbeat someone into walking away so they can feel like they "won" the argument. It's really nice when you can turn an argument into a discussion and it makes dealing with them much more reasonable in the future because they know you won't just blow them off and disrespect their views by shutting down or trying to shut them down. In other words, sometimes they just need to be heard. What many take as argumentative is usually frustration from not being given the respect of being heard, as if their opinions are somehow less valid than everyone else's. Nothing like water to take the heat out of fire.


Lol I have a really good friend like this, and I usually just feed wood to the fire. He gets super into it and I just laugh, watch and enjoy our shit show ?

@Renickulous He definitely is


Walk away. There is nothing that they hate more. Shut off their oxygen, the longer you engage with them the more they like don’t give them that satisfaction.


I work with someone who would never say they like to argue, but will say they play the "devil's advocate." That's code for "I will always take the other side because I love to dominate and win the conversation." I avoid this person, and if I do have to talk with them, I start by saying, "Just a quick question," or "Just a quick comment." I refuse to be drawn into a debate, an argument, or a one-sided conversation that takes up way too much of my time and attention.

We have a few of those here. I think you have a successful tactic in your arsenal!


I try to win as many arguments with them that I can. That sometimes discourages them.


First actually understand and identify what the argument is. Then establish the facts to see the truth and then use those to create points to argue for the reallity of the situation!

Jammo Level 5 Dec 16, 2018

It’s not really about Facts- it’s all about their undefined anxiety. There is a major difference between an argument and a discussion.

Chronic arguers really just want attention and a way to relieve some tension.

@Weismonger well if that's how the interlocutor thinks you're argument with them is very difficult to persuade. It's the lack of reasoning that creates a situation of lost reality!

@Jammo very true-And if people used more reason, logic & reality there would be less arguments to begin with—But too much fantasy including religion is in my opinion the cause of so much cognitive dissonance, Irrational and unproductive narcissism and a lack of understanding of the subconscious memory system for making decisions this all results in arguments & Oppression —I firmly think that without religion and other such fantasies in the world like socialism and communism that are actually utopian religious belief systems it would be a much more progressive and better world... and this is why When confronted by the religious & another believers in irrational beliefs systems I constantly say “prove it!“>> what proof do you have that what you say is either true, real or works? And that usually shuts them up.


Shut down and avoid. I get zero pleasure from arguing.

Zster Level 8 Dec 16, 2018

Argue about what? Is there any validity to their argument? Or are they like the paid contrarian in the old Monty Python sketch?


I won't indulge arguers. I used to be one and it is just exhausting trying to be right all the time. ? I came across a saying that I try to live by "I would rather be happy than right?

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