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Online Dating Practices

Why do people on online dating sites click “ meet me, like, interested, etc” when they have no actual interest in talking to the person tonwhom they indicated an interest? I always read profiles before I indicate an interest in getting to know someone. Are people just stupid and/or lazy? The waste of time and energy is beyond frustrating.

Tess67 5 Feb 6
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12 comments

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0

I've been on Plenty of Fish (POF) for a couple of years off and on. Living in Texas, it being a blood red state and my religious affiliation being Not Religious, things are pretty dry here. I get the view of my pictures and they must then look at the basics on the profile, see the not religious and move on. I believe in "truth in advertising", so haven't resorted to even putting down "spiritual" to get a few bites lol.

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I agree with most post here, they click "meet me" if they like the pic and never go and read the profile.

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Online dating is just a way to start a contact, it can become friedndship, or some more romantic relation. I like photos if I like photos, doesn't mean I am interested (actually on this site I think I only liked photos of one person that I am actually very much interested)

1

Agreed. Most of the time women click on Like for me, they have not read my profile and are simply indicating that they feel my main photo is acceptable looking enough that they might be interested in me. By itself, it's worthless as far as I'm concerned and I don't bother messaging those women after their Like click. They are being lazy.

@sweetcharlotte As far as clicking on the Like button, I was talking about the paid sites, where you get a daily list of matches from the site and as part of that you get the main profile pic and a little info about each person as part of a set of "Matches". Some people refer to this as swiping left or swiping right as the member is sorting thru a bunch of matches, usually without bothering to click on the button to read the profile. What the set of matches present you is the main profile pic, the person's name, age, city, nothing else. So when they click a Like for you all they are really doing is indicating that your main profile pic looks good enough to be spared rejection in their initial sorting/screening process. Which in my mind, means next to nothing if they haven't read my profile so I'm not going to bother messaging them.

0

Other people's motivations are difficult to understand, especially if you don't know them.

1

Best not to concern yourself with why people do things the way they do ... you'll go batty !
And you'll likely never find out anyway .

That’s good advice- difficult for me to follow at times, but I need to try harder

1

People treat dating profiles more like "things" than like there are acual actual people behind those profiles. A dating profile itself is an objectification of the person. So, people treat profiles like objects or things rather than people, usually with no realization of hwo what they do affects the person behind the profile.

2

On most dating sites, men grossly outnumber women. They quite often just play the numbers game and put out lots of feelers just hoping for a bite.
I appreciate this site as you get to know something about the guys by how they respond to questions in the feed. Men on sites rarely message me.. including this one. I have more success just doing everyday things.

0

Men on dating websites typically go for the youngest, hottest woman's photo they can find, and seldom, if ever, read profiles.

This website included. I don't think one man here has read my profile before messaging to ask me out.

I'm the complete opposite of that and I don't think I'm that much of a minority, at least on this site. I always read the profile before I message a woman with interest in her. Doing otherwise is a waste of my time and hers.

@TomMcGiverin - smart guy!!

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I don't know. When I was still looking a few months ago there was someone who seemed interested and lived nearby but never responded when I suggested we meet.

I think some ( most??) men just want to trade naked pix and have phone/ cyber sex. Damn dudes, just for porn. Lol

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Yeah, I noticed that a few times. But I suspect it's a result of people casting a very wide but shallow net. Men do this far more than women. In fact, at least for men, the online dating has been described as a "numbers game."

When I was doing the online thing, sometimes a woman would "match" with me, and never respond to my attempt to communicate. I'd make two attempts (saying something a bit more substantive than simple "hello" ) and if no response I'd move on and not think about it again.

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Most women who contact me never read my profile, and if they did they most likely would not waste their time contacting me.

I read your profile. I would not contact you as a romantic interest because you are 30 older than me and you live in Texas. I’m also always willing to tell a man why I don’t think we would be a good romantic match. But that never means Ibwoukd turn down a friendship- even an online one 🙂

@Tess67 Thank you. I am always a friend.

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