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A follow up: What makes you a terrible partner?

Yes, we have to ask. If you don't know, what has someone told you their reason for not wanting to be in a relationship with you?

For me, I tend to be negative. I don't even realize I do it as it is the way I was raised. I am not proud of it, just being honest.

Can you be the same?

Akfishlady 8 Mar 16
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42 comments (26 - 42)

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2

I like to be alone, living life my own way, for a good part of the day, so I get perturbed if someone invades my space too much, calls too often, shows up too early and/or doesn't get the hint when it's time to go home.

I'm not a good partner for someone who wants to take my sense of living away and won't give me space. I'm not one to invite people over too often, because I'd rather keep my living space to myself and go out to have fun.

Happy to get outside or go somewhere for music, dancing, hiking, conversation, walking, enjoying a sunset or drinks on the beach, etc., but I resent someone who comes into my space and wants to do nothing, keeping me from doing things I want to do. That tends to come out in some testiness on my part. Can't help it. What's so hard about giving a girl some space?

That's why I'm not looking too hard, if at all, for a partner.

2

I finish peoples sentances, I have real trouble having an orgasm and its not funny at all. I would of thought women would love it. I very independant and not too romantic and lovey dovey and much more.

2

I think being negative is a common thing for the partner which is I think is NOT always the reason for being terrible. some people like me tends to "like" the negative part of my partner. just my opinion. back to what makes me a terrible partner is I think I'm always being too gentle and being pessimist too at some point.

1

I am a pessimist. My negativity is draining on people and I've been told that before. I'm also very clingy, though not in a possessive sort of way. More that I like to be held and cuddled quite often and that can be a bit much for someone who doesn't like contact that often.

Who doesn't like cuddling. . its the best feeling in the world to be held.

1

My insecure, needy side.

1

Must be... sarcasm, lightly applied, semi stubborn, never needy, cynical, but only in the nicest possible way.
Those are some of my nicer qualities... someone commented here... "they were loners, introverted, wanting but never needing". I'm much the same, not so much introverted, but I do need a booze or two to dance. Odd though, I was a dancin fool in the 60's, and the booze was always flowing, then it became a requirement, not so fun.

Tomas Level 7 Mar 17, 2018
1

I'm a joker
I was a smoker
I'm a mid-night toker
And some people call me a Space Cowboy

jeffy Level 7 Mar 17, 2018
1

I am overly analytical and try to solve a partner's problem rather than just simply listening and being present. Trying to get better at this.

I snore like a bear in a cave. It is unlikely that I will get better at this.

1

In the past I was a terrible partner because I was insecure and easily made jealous. I have evolved quite a bit since then. These days I require a lot of freedom and tend to be in my own little world most of the time. I imagine I'd be a rather inattentive girlfriend currently.

1

I've never asked why someone wanted to break up with me, things just didn't work out. One guy decided he'd rather live close to his grandson than stay in Nebraska, and I get that. One guy decided his stuff was too important to him and he couldn't afford to move it. I haven't had a relationship move very far forward in years.

As for the faults I know I have, I'm bossy, go figure right. I like my alone time. I tend to identify the elephant in the room. I sometimes cogitate on issues. I have immense patience until I want it NOW! And I think I snore, but I'm not sure, the cats don't complain.

1

I don't like doing the things that most people enjoy, and what I like to do, most would hate.
I am boring.

1

Your behavior is always your choice. Evidently, you do not feel a sufficient need to act any differenttly. It that is so, you can expect similar results in the future..

1

You can change I was there and learned once I got away from home you can get more with honey, Being alone can be very lonely even for those who have lived alone for a long time.

Try to mix problems with fun things on a daily basis. It does not let you get into a funk.

0

It would take less time to write what makes me a good partner.

@Akfishlady Honest, good ethics, good dad, son, brother and friend. I the bed room, the list gets longer lol.

0

They don't want to be in a relationship with me after I kick them out..usually after very bad behavior that I allowed to go on FAR too long.

I'm not for everyone..you'd have to be high energy, high IQ, consumed with curiosity to sync well with me. I do what I want to do, and if the person doesn't want to join me, I do it myself. But if the person wasn't a good ballroom dance partner and hiking partner I wouldn't have dated him in the first place.

0

I've has a couple weird experiences with ladies. One had a crush on me for a year. Once we started dating she would freak out if I stayed over and give me this lecture of how she's up here and I'm down here.. if you ever watched Shrek and donkey debate the "like an onion" you get an idea of how that conversation went. I finally gave up and stopped seeing her.

... also 25 years in medicine has reduced my Empathy. I still have feelings but I don't express them very well. I can have a fked up sense of humor but I still laugh at normal stuff. I suprised myself when I cried as they put my ex GFS dog down a few years ago.

0

I am precise and do everything in my own good time. You have nothing to do with that and you cannot change me. I try to be fair but I live my life and you live yours. We can live a lot of it together with no problems if you understand I'm not everything for you. If you need me to be more than I am just ask me about it. I'm human. So are you.

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