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Why Men Send Dick Pics

What are your thoughts?

[psychologytoday.com]

VictoriaNotes 9 Mar 19

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12

Some women enjoy seeing dick pics and even ask to see it. One should not assume that is the case with every woman. Just wait until you are asked.

"Just wait until you are asked."

Agreed.

Exactly: wait until asked, or at least until the relationship has proceeded enough that one can make an educated guess on how it will be taken. No judgment being made on the action itself, just on the timing.

That's the key I think. Unsolicited dick picks are just idiotic. If they ask for one and you want to send it then I don't see the issue there...

I agree, wait until asked

@VictoriaNotes Oh ask, please ask, just ask... please? jajaja.... no seriously ask.
I hope you’re smiling.

@Tomas You nut. jajaja

Honestly, I think the only way I would ask for a pic would be to make sure it's not the size of a toothpick. 😛 I highly doubt I would ever ask, though.

0

That article was pure speculation at best, and totally slanted at worse. On that topic, I'm convinced the door swings both ways. Personally, I never have and never will send any woman I had met online photos of me below the belt, what I have down there is my business and no one else's. Of all the men I had met online and consider friends, none of them engage in that behavior either. On the flip side, I can't tell you how many times I've received unsolicited nudes from women of varying ages. In fact, on one app I had used the spamming got so bad that I decided to abandon it and move on to another, as admin did absolutely nothing to resolve the issue. I am currently active on another app similar in function to this one, and there are about two dozen channels dedicated to sharing nude female selfies, and not a single one for men, so much that some women on there are pushing for a nude male selfie channel. I can agree there are plenty of perverse men online who would be guilty of such, but I think the sending of unsolicited genitalia photos is something engaged on both sides. At least this app has shown promise in the sense that there appears to be very little to no spamming of that nature, considering this platform doubles as a dating site, which is good.

So, am I understanding that what you are saying is that there's an equal amount of women sending unsolicited pictures of their genitals as men? Were they prostitutes?

@VictoriaNotes Not in the least, and they had interacted with fellow users on public threads, so the regular users knew who they were, and for the most part they were exhibitionists, which I am not against per se but only wish they would have left me out of it. Regarding the ones on the other app I mentioned- they aren't prostitutes either, and most of them provided other social media contact information and what they did for their professions, not a single one a prostitute.

@VictoriaNotes Sorry, forgot to answer your first question. Yes, based on what I have witnessed after being on three different platforms, and I had observed fellow app users on there complain more about female nudes than male.

@SpikeTalon Interesting. You're the first guy I've met who said women sent pictures of their gentiles unsolicited. I've no doubt there are women in cyberland who do this, but if they are as plentiful as you are suggesting, the guys aren't saying so. Lots of women I know (including myself) have experienced this (even on this site) and not just for sexual reasons but for purposes of intimidating and trolling. I may start a post and ask how many guys here have received unsolicited pictures of women's genitals.

@VictoriaNotes That idea for the post sounds interesting. The men that I've been in contact with/met online who shared those details with me for the most part kept to themselves on that, aside from reporting it to admin, which did very little to resolve the issue. Thank you for your feedback.

@SpikeTalon And yours as well.

@VictoriaNotes EXACTLY- even though the men who send the dick pics don't even know you it's a way to exert power and control from afar. They love the idea of you opening it and being shocked and taken aback.

@HopefullyWiser Could you please explain as to how sending nude photos equates to exerting power and control? If you believe that much to be true, then technically I could say the same thing when I received unwanted naked photos of women below the belt, but hardly anyone seems to care about that though, at least not from what I see anyway. While I was somewhat shocked upon receiving such photos on another app, the shock quickly faded and I reported those users, I refused to be intimidated. I know I cannot possibly be the only guy out there who that has gone through such, and that has happened to me now on more than one platform, at least this site has been good so far.

7

They must be really hard up with nothing worth while to do.( Forget the pun)

I found the part about gay men interesting. They apparently don't have any issues with this.

@VictoriaNotes I wondered about that as well. Perhaps because once-upon-a-time-but-still-now, clandestine sex was the only available relationship between many gay men, thus making it a logical way to garner interest (or intent)? I know some gay men who would be disdainful of that being the method of first contact for anything other than sex.

@Benthoven -- what are your thoughts? (See comments from me and Lauren)

Well, I can't speak for all gay men, but the dick pick is a little different with us. We tend to be connoisseurs when it comes to a good pic: keenly aware of area, mass, structure, construction, and manufacture, and landscaping. But that being said, men in general, and gay men in particular, have kind of an obsessive fascination with that little tagger. It’s a toy we’ve grown up with, playing with since we first discovered it was there. And once we discovered how much fun we could have with it, we lost all reason when it comes to appropriately wielding it.

While I said as a joke that men don’t understand how women don’t find their dicks fascinating, I think it’s actually true. I remember in high school, the straight guys were always talking about their “giftedness,” showing it off, playing with each other. To them it wasn’t gay. To me... well now you know why I was always trying to avoid the locker rooms. I don’t know if it was societal, or if it’s a “guy thing,” but there is a lot of peacocking among other men.

So straight and gay, there’s a strong fascination with this little gadget... Your average dick-pick-sending guy loves HIS dick (and thinks you will too), whereas an average gay man prefers a smorgasbord and enjoys window shopping.

But gay man and women do share one thing in common. The pick should be “solicited.” I don’t know many gay men who are comfortable with perfect strangers sending dick picks unsolicited... unless they’re on one of the many gay hookup sights, like Grindr... in that case, it’s a given you’re going get some pictures. BUT... that doesn’t mean that they’re not going to go out and find some Website that offers them the lollypop buffet... so-to-speak.

I realize this is a bit of a ramble, sorry about that. As a percentile, I think more gay men are going to be “okay” with a dick pic, but even in that community, there’s a framework for how it works best. Our framework is more loosely structured, but it’s there nonetheless.

@Benthoven Not a ramble at all. Thank you so much for taking the time to explain at length. This was insightful.

Thanks, @Benthoven! That's interesting in contrast to straight dick pic senders ... although the fascination factor is apparently universal. 😉

3

This is unfathionable to me. I first discovered of this on this site and some friends confirmed it. I must be really wierd andniave to think it is absolutely disgusting not to mention a total lack of self-esteem.

I think this is another area we can never get as most men would love a picture of a woman's Genitalia.

As the article mentioned, some guys apparently get off (literally) on the shock factor.

@Akfishlady It's happened but I don't think it's near as common as on other dating-type sites.

@VictoriaNotes One would think that a valid site would screen this sort of crap! On my posting of feminism this is the kind of stuff women are exposed to and some men just scratch their heads and wonder what this "feminism" thing is all about, clueless!

7

I guess I've been lucky-no longer active on dating sites I have never received a dick pic.

Want to see mine???? (snicker)

I've never received one, either! Ha ha

"Stay off of Craigslist. They are ubiquitous there", she said gagging.

I recently went on a kinky dating site and immediately remembered why I stopped going there. It was very rare NOT to see a dick pic as their profile pic.

The dating sites w/no dick pics-Zoosk, Our Time, Match and Facebook's site whose name I forgot.

@kiramea, how booooring!

26

Some men think it's a "woman-lure", not unlike the worm on a fishing line. Hehehe. Anyhoo, I know this because my ex man, actually did this with me. OK, so it worked, but, in my defence, I was single, lonesome, in my 40s, and quite hormonal! We talked about it later and I learned that he thought his penis quite exemplary. I'm sorry that I ever dated him. (I feel embarrassed and stupid having ever been with him). I'll go sit in the corner now and just listen. :/

LOL -- get out of the corner. I appreciate your honesty. But, I have to ask --- did he send you a dick pic from the get-go?

@VictoriaNotes No. Not right away. We were yahoo contacts for about four years before he changed his profile pic to his penis. He changed options so that i was only one to see since he had family members as contacts too. We eventually lived together (NOT because of his penis!), so that's how I know. :/

Brave lady... with a great sense of humor... hope you’ve recovered.
... on the qt, could I have your email ? jajaja

Lol

2

As a woman who has recieved them unsolicited, this is a GREAT question. My theories are thus:
The man fears rejection based on his face, therefore hopes you will be amazed by his average looking penis?
He is a sexual predator and is on the police sheet for said crime and cannot show his face?
Or he just thinks his junk is so AMAZING that everyone should admire it as much as he does???

So do you report them when given the option?

@kensmile4u of course. After I harass them...

@Corvislover Good for you. I hope it helps to clean up the dating pool 😉

Yes, you mentioned some of the reasons listed in the Psychology Today article I posted in the OP. I've received dick pics as a means of attempting to show their dominance -- to try and intimidate me. While it's disgusting, I can't help but laugh because they resort to their second head --- apparently lacking enough intelligence to use their first head to counter a debate.

3

They think women are impressed by a big, firm, erection. I think they are mistaken.

As a woman, I have to say, I am impressed by a big, firm erection. Just not in the form of a picture. 🙂

@marga You are right..... of course a big hard dick is needed for sex. I was thinking about a photo of a big dick.

@nicknotes I know, just being silly, lol

34

I've never been that eager to show off my shortcomings. lol

You're so adorable sometimes. 😀

hahaha

14

Maybe the title of this post should be "Why Men Send Unsolicited Dick Pics?" That is inexcusable. Men who do this are cowards hiding behind the relative anonymity of the Internet. Consentually, I have no problem with sending nudes back and forth, but would never do so without permission.

@Akfishlady My girlfriend an I were about 13 when we encountered a flasher walking down the street one evening. I went straight to the point and laugh response, she joined in and he ran. LOL

1

So what we're saying is it's only men that send pics of their 'private parts'? Seriously, get a life people!!! I have received way more pussy/tit pics than I have ever sent dick pics. Just saying........

Oh and let me just qualify that slightly. I have sent dick pics but only after I've received something similar from a woman. Honestly, some of the sanctimonious shit I've read on here from men makes me think that there are some christians interloping on this site.

Just curious, did you read the article? I don't think people are talking about solicited or consensual pictures of each other.

3

Ithink alot of them do it cause it gets the point across quickly. they offer the pic as an invitation and hope to get someone interested. saves on time of talkin and all that but most don't realize that the talkin and gettin to know her is a much better approach if u want to get to the sex stage.

jorj Level 8 Mar 19, 2018

Yeah, that was one reason mentioned in the article.

@VictoriaNotes prob should have read the article then....im lazy on things like that sometime

3

I wonder if the appeal is similar to that of being forced to watch a man masturbate (such as Louis C K or Harvey Weinstein)? Perhaps they're not using it as a method of starting a relationship, but as a way to get release via sexual subjugation?

The article did touch on that somewhat. From what I gather from the article, the reasons seem to be multifaceted.

@VictoriaNotes Ha! TOUCHED ON THAT!

5

@VictoriaNotes, do you remember a similar post I made back in Nov/Dec? What I find interesting is that the article actually tries to explain and almost makes this act somewhat normal. However, almost unnamimously the responses, from back then and now are practically the same. In general the men on this site, think that these men are pigs, immature, and even verging on criminal. I find that significant. Not that I'm discounting what the women say, because I've experienced the unsolicited dick pics too. But men are the ones doing this and "our men", at least the ones commenting, seem to have rather strong opinions against this behavior. What do you make of that? Are our guys more mature, intelligent, respectful, understanding, what?

I think it speaks volumes, and I'm encouraged. 🙂

Me too! We have some of the best guys, here on this site!

1

Good answers. Certainly it's criminal when you get down to it. Another related question is why are so many women with men that have sent them unprompted dick picks? I know many, and they speak on it like they're more flattered and excited by it than disgusted.

Interesting. I've yet to meet a woman who was flattered by unsolicited dick pics, although I'm sure they're out there -- likely the ones just wanting to fuck, nothing more.

@VictoriaNotes These are people in relationships. One I can think of is married. It's possible that they just want sex with the other person and are just going along with the relationship for it, but who knows?

9

Intellectually lacking, physically packing

Hutch Level 7 Mar 19, 2018

Always the former. Not necessarily always the latter. Usually always a disappointment.

1

I think a better question might be why do you folks think penises are either shameful, offensive or disgusting?

You folks may say you reject the churches teachings but apparently not all of the churches teachings were bad.

Sister Mary Catherine taught you well.

Our society does not show them all the time. We only encounter them when we are being intimidate with a man, which should always imply consent. This has nothing to do with religious beliefs, but social standards that we have come to expect. Unexpectedly and suddenly seeing them when no such intimacy exists tells us that the person so exposed is perceiving us sexually, when we are typically at a point where we are trying to establish a personal connection instead. It’s offensive because it says that who we are is less important to the person exposing himself than the fact that he sees us as an object of reception to his sexuality. The penis itself isn’t shameful, but exposing it this way should be.

10

Because some of them are dicks 😉

Nomad Level 6 Mar 19, 2018

*snorts*

0

Well Ihave never done a dick pick but think about it like this. If a guy sends a dick pick too one girl that odds of her msging back the she is DTF are low but you send it too 10 Girls they are higher at the end of the day he just wants too Smash.

Girls? Now that's sicko creepy.

2

Of course you're taling about unsolicited pics.
Then again, it is our favorite part and we just want to show it off.
Have you ever seen a woman right after she's gotten a boob-job?

Not entirely a fair comparison, given how often women have had men yell, “Show us yer tits!” Showing them off is typically a little less unsolicited. (Disclosure: I have never exposed mine anywhere except a bedroom)
?

2

My brain is unbelievably attractive, and I have an enormous heart, but neither are terribly photogenic ?

LOL

18

Whats worse than a dick-pick?

A dick-cheney-pic 😉

Nomad Level 6 Mar 19, 2018

Evil dick. (( shudder ))

2

Some, not all.

That should go without saying. Anyone who thinks otherwise is an idiot.

1

It's the same reason that some women send tit picks.

How many unsolicited vulva pics have you received?

3

Even better the unsolicited wanking video, Reply is always "Yes, I know you're a wanker!"

The equalled unsolicited detailed critique of said member usually sorts out the problem too, especially with the footnote that if it was really unlike any I'd seen before then I wouldn't be interested anyway because it would have to be seriously deformed or diseased.

Kimba Level 7 Mar 20, 2018

I did not know that was a thing! I must lead such a sheltered life 🙂 I can't imagine sending a solicited wanking video let alone an unsolicited one. 🙂

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