How is being rejected in real life any different from being rejected online, exactly? Statistics say, you will kiss 80 or more frogs before one turns into a prince, and online just widens the pond.

1. Learn to read profiles like you would read real estate ads ("convenient"= next to a Walmart, "willing to relocate" = homeless).
2. Learn which questions You need answered, and get those answers first.
3. "Talk" long enough safely thru the site and keep your radar on 'high'!......the crazy ones cannot keep it together very long, out-of-place smarmy remarks are Not romantic, etc. etc.

After being single a while, a friend and I were tired of hearing "you should try online dating" - particularly from my mother - so we figured we'd give it a shot, if only to shut everyone up. It was interesting and (spoiler alert) neither of us ended up with a mate. But at least we can say we tried.

Part of my disappointment was that a lot of men in the area were not very original with their "love my dog, my god and my gun" thing. The dog part was nice. While I appreciate the number of god-fearing men who were willing to sacrifice their religion in order to service me, I already have that covered. It was demoralizing, though, to have new faces every morning, many of whom feel compelled to state your flaws. But eventually I ended up here, so I consider that a success story!

Funny side note: my friend had been gracefully deflecting her boss' interest in her for a good number of months, but woke up one morning to find out a dating site had matched them up. She was moritified. Her membership expired on March 17th and she won't be renewing.

That whole online dating thing is crushing me too. Most women on there don’t respond to me and, those who do get bored of my political and philosophical talks.
You’re not alone!

Many years ago I had an online dating experience, which, I am happy to say that never resulted in an acutal meeting. After chatting online with a woman for three consecutive days, she typed in the window: "I've got very expensive tastes." I replied: "I'm delighted to learn about your very expensive tastes, I hope you can afford them." Needless to say that was the end of communication with her.

I have 2 friends who met their spouses online. One has been together for 16 years, but I’m not sure what online forum they met in. The other has been married for 3 years, and they met through OKCupid.

Personally, it has been a disaster. I don’t mean that as hyperbole either (7 months later and I’m still not fully recovered). I’m not doing it anymore.

As a gay man, I dound tha tfindign peple via bars, or throug friends worked much better than online dating... at least that is how it worked for me.

I think technology has greatly reduced personal interactions a great dal and I expect relationships to suffer as a result of that.

I come from a generation that still finds it distasteful to use online dating.
A general sense of being desperate or pathetic. I'm betting the percentage of my age group that is digitally savvy is much lower than it is for the under 40 crowd

This format makes it impossible for people to be real with each other. It is rather sad. I got full on scammed by someone online, and it was a woman i knew from childhood, we had been good friends and then one day she really swept me off my feet by being interested, and we started "dating" from afar.

Then we got together, it turned out she had been married three times and all she does is smoke, drink, and gamble and stalk her creepy ex husband. I ended up being robbed by her and her friends, nearly taken out to the desert, but the cat has claws.

I know one couple who met online and married, most are really bad matches. Either one lied to the other or they didn't take the time to become aquainted.

Almost 4 years on and I am still convinced She is the best thing that ever happened to me. I did not meet Her through commercial dating sites. Those places are scams as far as I can tell. Get in online groups that encourage or allow dating, something you are interested in or passionate about. If you create a FB group, they will come. If you run it yourself you can keep out the wearisome dregs. Be as open and honest about who you are and what you want out of life, relationships, everything. It is not an instant process. I wish you the best!

I've tried it with very little luck. The bright spot was running across my ex-wife's online dating profiles. She had 3 of them. Lied about her age and vocation in evry one of them!!! I suppose it's rampant. The lying, I mean. So she hooked up with a loser and moved him into the house and he can't stay out of the hospital or hold a job. Now she's having to take care of a dead-beat and I'm loving it. That's my experience with online.

Me too!! The throw them on the wall and see what sticks theory of finding dates is just not working out for me! I'm like you, I'm beginning to think that it's me who's fatally flawed.

Does ANY way of meeting people automatically result in long term happy relationships ? No. But any way can - given the right combination of minds, the patience to seek, and the knowhow for give and take once you find a compatible human.

But if online is not leaving you feeling good - perhaps it's not for you.

P.S. - I've had two very satisfying long term relationships with folks I met online, and know of plenty others... can work.

Two and a half years ago I was on Facebook and I said something that was obviously brilliant... LOL no but somebody from India messaged me and asked if I wanted to be friends. After about half a year we ended up entering into a relationship officially even though we knew the odds were not good. We recently broke up but we still care very much about each other and if there was any way possible to make it work, we would have. However before that I tried online dating for about 10 years and like you I found that it did diminish my self confidence and it was very depressing and people lied and there are so many people out there who aren't even single or they are just looking for a Band-Aid solution before they go back to their EX... It is definitely very difficult and I am gay which makes it about a hundred times more difficult. I'm also a single parent, and non-religious but living in the south so dating for me is a shit show. Honestly being single again, completely, is terrifying and I really don't anticipate ever dating anyone again but I think you just have to put yourself out there and let life take you for a ride because whether you believe in fate or happenstance, we really don't have a whole lot of control over who falls in love with us. We only have control over the choices we make. I choose to be happy even though I have slept alone for three years

Destroy your id and they can help.
Your long range happiness is now to be achieved through a series of encounters lasting anywhere from 10 minutes to a couple months, separated by ego-smashing, often inane messages between people you don't know at all. And smile.

Online dating is inherently shallow. I met someone pretty amazing through tinder, but I broke it off after a couple months. I’ll give it another go after the summer. Just too busy right now.

I'm currently going through a divorce and signed up to some of the 'dating sites' to see what's out there for newly singles. Far from a veteran though and looking past my personal turn-offs(religious, heavy smokers, dumb,etc.) and no dates yet, it seems that the ones I find attractive don't feel the same, and vica versa. I've gotten a dozen hellos that are simply "Hey there", is that a required greeting or what? Heh. Anyway I'm still dabbling in it and avoiding the Jesus freaks, scammers and grifters. Note; Amazing the number of women with no pic of themselves, or a pic of their dog. Anyhoo, a newbies take, so far..

Last year I started meeting guys from traditional dating sites. They were not liberal like me except for one political activist. We went on two dates but he was so busy legislating he had no time for me. The others were into dating not developing long term relationship. I have cancelled all those since finding Agnostic.com. I have had messaging and phone calls with people from all over. I recently met a fellow member on the west coast and made a new friend. Talking to other members who know I will travel and even re locate. Still a work in progress.

I should add that I actually married someone I met online. We were together for six years, married for 4. I finally came to the conclusion he possibly pretended to love me to get a green card. He says that’s not the case of course. Unfortunately now when anyone messages me who is originally from somewhere else I am on guard. This is my one online dating “success” lol

I suppose it does work for some but older women face the challenge of men mostly looking for younger women. I chatted with some nice people but when I've listed my turnoffs, one can guess being as I am on agnostic.com the ones interested are fewer. I've been single 8 years now and I figure if the love of my life comes along so be it otherwise I just enjoy life.

I would work on why you would allow it to be horrible for your self-esteem. You are the star of your site/post on these dating services. People will lie, that's a given, within a few exchanges you can sort out the nuts and move on. Just be true to you.

I met my ex online..almost as soon as I posted my profile, his answer came back, answering all my picky requirements, from having a masters degree to having lived abroad. We eventually divorced but had fun while it lasted.

I meet someone online and we was in a relationship like for 5 years.

I don't know how long any relationship will last, I do know people who have met on dating sites and have even married. I met one lady on a site and we dated for 2-3 years, moving in together killed it. wow, we split 14 years ago. Time flies.
hey, it's not your fault the right people are not there.

I can't give first hand positive experience information, but I know of two married couples who met through online dating sites.

My experiences have been, mixed.

yes it can be very good on two counts (a) because you might never meet the person you are chatting too you most certainly not marry them. therefore yes a double wammy. they end up happy and you end up happy. James