Oh yeah. Usually right after turning a guy down.

This may be the most depressing thread I've read here so far.
I feel like I know you all better now though.

Many times. I’ll share what my mom told me. When someone says something mean like that they have something dark and scary inside and are trying to make themselves feel better. I eventually learned that there is a term for it, it is called leveling. That is the process when someone doesn’t like themselves very much and are trying to bring other’s down or below their level of self-worth/esteem.

Once I understood that it took the sting out of the insults and instead of returning the insult I gave them a compliment. The insults usually stopped and my self-esteem grew.

I was bullied quite a bit as a teenager by schoolmates when I was a relatively newcomer to this country. So yes, I’ve been called ugly and other things. My worst bully though was my own mother who would always remind me that I was ugly and fat (though I never have been overweight). She would tell me that no one would ever want me or even would look at me. Being of Asian origin I’ve also gotten racial slurs. While travelling (I was called crazy Chinese while in Amsterdam) and in my own country (someone called me sushi right to me face and laughed at me). These days I just ignore people who say negative things to me for no reason or I would laugh at them for being ignorant and stupid.

I agree with others here. You are in no way ugly. But still, I would rather be ugly outside than ugly inside like those who’ve called you ugly.

Beauty is subjective. Don't let it get to you. People are dicks.

Sorry that happened. Some people are just awful. Hope the rest of your day was better than that.

So many thoughts on this...but it all comes down to the reality that some people just suck.

And they should suck....a giant bag of d*cks.

I'm a little saddened that so many people have affirmatively responded to this post.

I am sorry you had that happen. I know it sucks.

20 years ago, during the AOL days, I was 22 and a girl who I was chatting with asked me for a picture. I sent her what I thought was my best and her response was, "Ew. You're ugly" and she disappeared from the chat. It wasn't the first time I'd been called it, but as I had previously tried to avoid such situations, it was the first time as an adult. It stayed with me for many years. My serious relationships have been sparse & it disappoints me how insecure I am due to my fear of that word.

Yes -years ago (damn, 21 - 22?) I managed a Musicland in Mobile, AL. It was a small store, and outside of peak hours, there were many times when there was only one of us running the whole kit and kaboodle. Anyway, one of these mornings, a man and his son (who was maybe five) were buying a CD, and I went to check them out. As I'm trying to talk and be friendly, the boy asks his father, "Daddy, why he so ugly?"

I didn't say a word. The father looks at me, and says, "I don't know; why are you so ugly?"
Then they both laughed, handed me some cash, and left the store.

From the mouths of babes, I suppose. Ended up writing one of my first publilshed poems after that incident.

Not actually to my face but people driving by like to comment on my weight. Was out for a leisurely bike ride once and some guy yelled out, “you’re not going to loose weight riding like that.”

WTF. Is that you in your profile pic? YOU ARE NOT UGLY!!!! WTAF.

I was called ugly once at a party with a girlfriend by a toothless heroin addict. We all laughed at him for it. Granted, I'm sure I looked like a bag lady next to her, she was model like.

At best I'm cute now. In those days I could stop traffic. Had my day.

My late husband had a friend who hated my guts for "stealing his boy", "his drinking buddy" and called me "mundane" to my face. That didn't end well for him in the end. 20 years later I had the last word. He found out how "mundane" I really am.

I was called ugly to my face for pretty much the entirety of school.

A couple that I can remember.
A girl that rode the same bus as me to school went on and on about how ugly I was.
She wasn't a model herself and a couple of my friends made her aware of that. I still felt like shit though.

Another time a guy who I worked for had a young daughter (6-7) that kept saying "look how ugly you are."
I wanted to strangle the little shit.

Yeah -- I was in an emotionally and psychologically abusive relationship for many years, where one of her go-to gaslighting tactics was to tell me "you're really lucky I stay with you; who else would ever want to be around someone as fat and disgusting as you are?" -- you can only hear that for so long from someone who's supposed to love you, before it seeps in and you actually start believing it.

But here's the thing: we are all our own worst critics - worse than anyone else out there. We magnify and inflate every flaw, every issue, every non-issue, every insecurity about ourselves... most of us say things to ourselves in the mirror that we would flat-out punch someone for saying about our best friend.

So when someone else comes along and says "you're ugly", it's literally the easiest, cheapest pot-shot to take at another human being... because I don't care if you're Joe Schmo on the street or a million-dollar supermodel, you will agree, because you see flaws in yourself that no one else even does... not even the jerk who flippantly spouted off at you, to get under your skin.

Sure, you could snap back with something sarcastic like "Funny, that's not what your Mom was moaning last night"... but really I don't suggest it; that's a good way to get into an altercation, if someone doesn't have a sense of humor. =)

I looked at your profile, Mike -- you seem like a really nice, educated, good-looking guy. You've even got that 5 o'clock shadow thing going on that looks great on you (but makes me look like a Post Office mug shot). If we went to hang out at the local bar together, I would expect you'd get approached long before I would.

Now, is that me seeing my own flaws, and not seeing or noticing yours? Maybe. Or maybe you really are better looking, from an objective standpoint. Either way, I would chalk the situation up to someone taking a cheap and easy swing at someone else, just to rattle them and feel better about themselves. Sure, you could fire off a snappy retort... but when it's about something already as subjective as human appearance? I'd let it slide, and not think anything more of it.

Oh yeah, When I got my haircut really short, my paternal grandmother, called me "Bruja" - means ugly in Italian.

Ive been made fun of quite a lot for being overweight. People can be very mean.

Insults hurt when said, but after that it is our choice to re-live the moment or not. Don't give power to that memory.

Yup, and worse. My sister in law said to my face that I am ‘inappropriate with no social skills’.
Well. Have to consider the source!

I was bullied almost my entire time in school, from elementary into high school. The kids would call me Helen bellon watermelon. I still remember that and all I wanted was to be friends with my classmates. Growing up my parents would tell me I was worthless, they still do actually. I don't know where my self esteem came from. I have my moments of self doubt, more times than I care to think about. But, for the most part, I choose to be the cashew girl and walk with my head held high and proud of the things I have accomplished and the person I have become.

My husband and I usually didn't fight dirty, but we had some tragedies during our marriage, and it took its toll. He had a girlfriend, and we were fighting. I was thin and had nice curves when I was young, and had been pretty good looking,but, after a few things, I gained weight, he had a bit of a beer gut, and we were older. His girlfriend was younger than me, not the brightest bulb in the pack, but a nice enough person. At one point, we were into it, and he told me I was fat, ugly, stupid and he was ashamed to be seen with me. I waited a beat and told him that I understood. A Greek God, Rhodes scholar like him needed a beauty on his arm, who was able to carry on a conversation with all of the geniuses that he hung out with, and I'm sure he has to go to soirees at the White House, and needs to mingle with 4 star generals, ambassadors, and the president. The United States needed them to help govern. He said, what's a soiree. We both started laughing.

I was told from early childhood that "I would never amount to nothing" by my stepfather. When I turned 17, I moved out, I met my future wife, now my ex when I turned 22. We bought our first house when I turned 25. We purchased a duplex when I was 28. We purchased a 12 unit apartment building in Los Angeles. We own 11 units in OR and a few properties in other states. Do not let people put you down, it's their own insecurity showing, my stepfather was a lazy POS, never worked a day in his life.

Pretty fortuitous for me seeing this post now. Maybe half an hour ago, I happened to come by a video of me on youtube from about five years ago. I typically have a thick skin, but weight has always been a sensitive issue for me. And at the time of the video, I had really ballooned in weight, dealing with, of course bad choices, but also depression and chronic pain. A commenter rather brutaly made fun of my weight. I'm healthy, or getting healthy now, but I won't lie that it made me feel pretty crappy. And I feel stupid for caring. But reading others' responses and support here, I'm feeling a lot better than only moments ago <3

The moral of the story is people can be total assholes. I couldn't tell you how many times people made fun of my weight in school. I also had an adult sized head since like the 4th grade, they always find something. I've learned not to give half a damn about what others, especially people that I don't care about, think. Either that or I think of some witty comeback. Here's something that happened in middle school. This was in fact after I had lost near 40 pounds.
Person: Why are you so fat?
Me: Why are you so anorexic? You should go eat a sandwich.
There was a time where my sister claimed that have no purpose in life because I was atheist. And she didn't even give me a chance to respond. She just kept on raising her voice: "No! You don't have any purpose!"
I was so sick of it. Of course I don't normally say things like that. Only if someone is being a total dick.

I stopped by my baby brother's house after job hunting. His room-mate's girlfriend said "You look kind of pretty when you wear makeup". I wanted to punch her.

Another time I was in Shipley's Donuts getting donuts for my kids and husband. The cashier asks how many months pregnant I was. I just told her that I wasn't pregnant, just fat. She turned all shades of red.

My older sister is known as the pretty sister. We were in a dance club, and a guy asked her to dance. His friend came up to me after she left and told me that since she was already dancing he might as well dance with me.

I truly hated my early years.