82 14

Jesus loves you? What does it mean to you?

I was just thinking about this cause I still have people telling me this pointless thing and I am convinced people have to tell themselves and others that cause life is hard and they need to always feel like someone is watching over them and love them. I’ve had to block people cause I’ve had religious friends texting me stuff like that or asking me things like ,” Have I talked to Jesus today. I should talk to him cause he love me.” Lol I know it’s quite pathetic! What do you guys think? The whole quote to me is just pointless.

By EmeraldJewel
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82 comments

7

He doesn't phone, write or email. Not once has he remembered my birthday or popped round with a few beers.

Jesus doesn't love me.

If anything he's a bit self obsessed with all the "Look at me, there's 3 of me! I'm me, my Dad & Casper over there" and his "I died for your sins and was raised 3 days later...ok, I gave up my weekend for your sins.

Jesus really needs to get over himself.

Eastrenbi Level 5 May 5, 2018
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"He doesn't phone, write, or email,"

But he does answer knee mail lol

6

How can we believe that a man that lived and died 2000 years ago loves us. That is if he existed at all. A dead man cannot watch over me and we re talking thousands of years. What is it meant by "loves you". If I go babbling in the streets about Jesus loving him/her it is OK. If I say the same thing but use Napoleon instead of Jesus, then I am crazy. Both instances are crazy requiring medical treatment.

KashFigueroa Level 6 May 5, 2018
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5

"I have no interest in your zombie Jew."

irascible Level 8 May 5, 2018
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Lol

4

If Jesus had loved me he would have treated me better.

dahermit Level 7 May 5, 2018
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4

Some gay dude wants my number ?

Simon1 Level 7 May 5, 2018
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(: hahahahaha

3

"Jesus loves you" is another way of saying "You're a loser."

GodlessFred Level 6 May 5, 2018
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Yep!

3

It means to the religious that it is true of course, to the non religious blah blah blah, i just say all that do feel good about themselves love themselves and necessarily don't need Jesus or Superman, Wonder Woman or any other deity too love them to get thru life

ScienceBill72 Level 7 May 5, 2018
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I really wouldn't mind a wonder woman, don't take my dream away smile003.gif

Edited
3

Is this the reason so many priests are pediphiles? When they were little kids it was ok to accept that a magical nomad loves them

Andyg17 Level 5 May 5, 2018
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I was just thinking that a few months ago.

3

Imaginary people can't love you. Just ignore the fools.

freedom41 Level 7 May 5, 2018
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IKR.

3

I've discovered that if you tell those people "The reason Jesus is your best friend is that he's the only one that can't tell you to fuck off. If he was real, he would, just like everybody else.", they don't bother you any more.

JustKip Level 7 May 5, 2018
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3

It means nothing to me other than the person uttering it is delusional.

Bobby9 Level 7 May 5, 2018
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3

Absolutely nothing..

charlotte62 Level 7 May 5, 2018
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3

He certainly has some peculiar ways of showing that love. Pretty silly stuff.

Sticks48 Level 8 May 5, 2018
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3

Jesus loves me? I don’t recall ever having been to a Mexican gay bar...

ghettophilosopher Level 6 May 5, 2018
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Lol

2

Santa Claus loves me too, at least he brings me tangible gifts.

boholbrook Level 4 May 7, 2018
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At least Santa is what made most of our childhood, but we came to understand he didn’t exist at a reasonable age.

@EmeraldJewel fuck you mean Santa isn't real?!

@boholbrook Hate to break it to you this way. Welcome to reality with the rest of us.

Edited

Who's Santa?

2

When I read a statement such as that, I can't help think what a bunch of absolute meaningless unintelligible dribble that is.

SpikeTalon Level 8 May 6, 2018
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2

I ignore them and hit them with logic. I have had a few "unfriend" me on face book. Oh well!

Trod Level 4 May 5, 2018
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2

Usually I hear the first one smile009.gif

Bierbasstard Level 8 May 5, 2018
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2

I got so sick of this and people saying "God is love" that I made this meme to send back at them

LenHazell53 Level 8 May 5, 2018
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Now that should be in every humans, notebook

2

It’s an occupational hazard for me so at work I just ignore it and move in to the next thing. Outside work I would probably say something like, you don’t even want to know what he told me about you and it’s a shame really because you had such a promising futuresmile003.gif

ArdentAtheist Level 8 May 5, 2018
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2

Just nod your head and say yes, so does the easter bunny and the elf on the shelf, they all love you and they're all watching out for you.

Redcupcoffee Level 7 May 5, 2018
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Great retort!

2

Yes, Jesus stalks me, yes Jesus stalks me, the bible told me so.

LEPeff Level 8 May 5, 2018
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Hilarious!

Lmfao! I’ve been getting a kick out of reading these comments.

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2

The person saying it might believe it, but that makes it no less what it is...bullshit.

IAMGROOT Level 7 May 5, 2018
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2

When I hear the phrase "Jesus Loves You" I automatically think, "Jesus, this person is kinda stupid! Then I try to move away slowly...

Flyingsaucesir Level 7 May 5, 2018
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2

Means I'm speaking with someone I do not have interest in speaking with.
Luckily it's most likely the last thing I'll hear them say.

Slappy_Longarms Level 7 May 5, 2018
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