At best I think people who say this are trying to be nice by sharing a thought that gives them comfort in hopes it will give you comfort. People don’t say this to me for whatever reason but I would imagine it would be awkward regardless of who said it. If a stranger said it, it would be very presumptuous of them to think it would have any meaning to me at all. If a loved one said it I would wonder why they didn’t say “I love you and will do whatever I can for you because I love you”.

Typically said by somebody who doesn't.

It means nothing to me, because I don't believe he ever existed anywhere except for some folk's fevered imaginings.

Absolutely nothing..

A very pointless quote, may be a walking stick for the weak;

Means I'm speaking with someone I do not have interest in speaking with.
Luckily it's most likely the last thing I'll hear them say.

I don't fancy a latino right now ! I'm more into girls anyway

When I hear the phrase "Jesus Loves You" I automatically think, "Jesus, this person is kinda stupid! Then I try to move away slowly...

It means I'm in trouble while showering in a mexican prison

The person saying it might believe it, but that makes it no less what it is...bullshit.

He's a liar

Santa Claus loves me too, at least he brings me tangible gifts.

Well meaning I guess, but also attemting to take advantage of you.

I have a few acerbic replies to it but I rarely hear it these days as everyone who knows me who is in the slightest religious knows not to cross swords with me. I usually reply something like "Cool and Santa really loves you" or if feeling a bit more mean "Really? then how come he don't swallow ? "

Just as much as if you to say the green unicorn from nimburu loves you. ?

It’s an occupational hazard for me so at work I just ignore it and move in to the next thing. Outside work I would probably say something like, you don’t even want to know what he told me about you and it’s a shame really because you had such a promising future

Babble.

Time to get a restraining order.

You speak the truth. While it is comforting to think a supernatural deity loves and cares for you, there is no evidence that it is true. It might be better to cultivate love and friendship with family and friends rather than with a supernatural deity.

Jesus loves me. I love you too, Jesus, but I'm not, like, in love with you. Let's just be friends. Besides, you like had this big, bitching party - The Last Supper. All your homeys were invited. But me. I didn't get an invite. I mean, really, dude, I thought you said you loved me.

Unless they're talking about the guy who plays for Man C it means sweet FA, and if they are talking about him why would he?

I ignore them and hit them with logic. I have had a few "unfriend" me on face book. Oh well!

If Jesus had loved me he would have treated me better.

When I read a statement such as that, I can't help think what a bunch of absolute meaningless unintelligible dribble that is.

Recently I was intercepted by a old codger, my age mid 60s, and a somewhat retarded young woman in her 20s, pushing a new brand of religion: Jews for Jesus or something like that.
She: Jesus loves you.
Me: Who?
She: Jesus
Me: Oh... I like cheeses
She No ... Jeeeesus.
Me: What type: Roquefort, Reblochon . Are you asking me about my cheese eating habits?
She: don't you know Jesus?
Me: Is he a local? Try the information booth ... Pointing in the direction.
She was getting desperate ... So her old codger supervisor walked over to us ... I think she was under instruction.
The he started telling me that Jesus loves me?
Me: Is he male?
Old cadger: yes ... He ...
Me: sorry mate I am not into that sort of thing.
The scene lasted for about 10 and I even enjoyed the spiel