Yes. I started seeing a therapist about 3 months after my husband died. I was in therapy for about 8 months. It helped tremendously.

I encourage others to seek help when they experience a large life event.

However, not all therapists are created equal. If you don't mesh with this one, there's nothing wrong with requesting someone else.

I think that these therapists are just like lawyers chasing ambulances. Thriving off the grief of others. Each of us has to go through our own grieving process. There is no magic solution.

No but perhaps I should have.

Yes, lots

I was offered grief counseling from the hospice company, but I didn't take it. I think I am a realistic person and am doing ok by myself. My husband was also an atheist, so I know his feelings about death being final

there is no steps in grieving just grief and how you cope with it the 5 stages of grief were meant for the person facing death not those left behind

My daughter did. We've both been in for different reasons prior.
This time around I chose not to. There was nothing anyone could "redirect"/"rephrase" in my case, as I ceased to be me and did everything I could to ease his horrible journey. I was and am, at peace with myself during that horrific time.

Altho I loved our last therapist one of the areas I needed help with (with my late dh before he was ill) he totally dropped the ball and wasted a ton of time. His great strength being dealing with the school system and kids with IEPs.
Soooo, after having found out a lot on my own, things he totally could have helped me with, began to prepare with online articles before dh's passing. That did help a great deal.

With all that it's like I have this totally new relationship with dh in his wake. It's bizarre.
Turns out I was mourning him twice, and now 3 times. Before he was ill, during, and after.

In any case widowhood articles were a big help to me. Widow/widower hood is a club unto itself and it's different for everyone. But one thing seems to be constant, in my case the points about how becoming a widow changing your relationships with friends etc is totally true. A lot of people just didn't know what to do with us. We aren't him. And we remind them of him. And probably remind them of all the "if you need anythings" that weren't specific enough and never came to be....

This is very cool Holiday. Is this the site? the link didn't come up in your post.

[betterhelp.com]

i submitted myself to a therapist for several months, about a year after the fact, but i only lasted maybe 8-10 sessions. she wasnt telling me anything i didnt already know, nor was she being particularly helpful in how to handle grief, so we parted ways. personally, i wouldnt recommend therapy, at least not based on my experience.

no. my wife died of ALS, a trajectory that can last years between diagnosis and death. there is no return ticket from a diagnosis so you start to grieve immediately. it's not like losing a dear one in an auto accident or plane crash