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As you are aware, this is somewhat difficult. On April 15, 2018 it will be two years since my wife of 54 years has died. Time has helped but not that much. Life with her, as I knew it no longer exists. I still have a problem "fitting in" and I just feel empty. They say, "you have to put yourself out there"------Wrong it doesn't work. Besides, what I've seen of "out there", I don't like.

I feel myself getting wordy, so I'd better quit. I'm sure I'll be back. Thanks for the invite.

albu 3 Apr 12
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When I lost my dear wife to A.L.S. five years ago my life was destroyed. I knew I had to make a new life out of the ashes of the old. How do I do that? I "put myself out there" by joining new social circles, meeting new people and made new friends as well as stayed connected to the old ones.

You don't need to "fit in". Join social circles that fit you.

Nothing could make me feel better but keeping busy and following my passions was a good distraction!

dare2dream Level 7 Apr 23, 2018

You know, our hearts are wounded. It's not better for me either.

Wildgreens Level 8 Apr 18, 2018

I thought of you yesterday. The two-year mark. For me, I thought it was supposed to be a milestone the mark that represents a change for the better. The hurt and sadness didn't fade, it turned into melancholy, a reminder of what could have/should have been.

The memories became easier and the smiles have become less sad. A new normal becomes easier to accept and eventually comfortable with the help of family and friends.

I just wanted you to know that you were in my thoughts and you are not alone. That empty space will fill up again, it won't feel the same, the fit won't be quite right but it won't be empty. Take care. 🙂

Betty Level 7 Apr 16, 2018

Thank you for sharing your story. I am nearing the two year mark as well but we weren't together nearly as long as you (37 years). I didn't think I would ever feel truly happy again but websites and groups like this have helped. You are putting yourself out there by joining in and participating in this group just as we are and we are happy you are here with us. Take care, Katie

Redbud Level 5 Apr 13, 2018

I feel for you. So hard to lose a part of yourself. Find and do what brings you pleasure and don't worry about tomorrow, today is what you have. So, find the reasons to smile and take the opportunities to laugh, tomorrow is promised to no one. If you don't like what's out there, then don't worry about it just be you. 🙂

Betty Level 7 Apr 12, 2018

What excellent words of wisdom. Henry's death at 64 really opened my eyes about the fleeting nature of life and how important it is to enjoy every moment. It can actually get a little frustrating when loved ones who knew him seem to be wasting their lives on needless strife. I want to shout, "Didn't you learn anything from his death?" As he lay in his bed, his muscles wasting away, all he wanted to express was love and gratitude. He was so calm facing the unknown of death I wish we could be half as noble in our daily lives and love and appreciate each other as he did.


What an amazing man your Henry. You honor and celebrate his life every time you speak of him. We have this life, enjoy as much as you can. Take care. 🙂

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