I was married to a wonderful woman for 36 years. Then, she died. So I'm starting over.

Yeah, it's scarey. How does one live a single life? Who am I now as a single man? What is the new dating etiquette? How can a person not be sharing his life and still be well adjusted, happy and live a life of depth and meaning? I have to find answers.

@pamb68 -- Well, no, I'm not. Wanna know why? Because every time I wake, it is a new day -- a new start.

I think I know what you're trying to say here, but I could be totally wrong. I like to think of every big change in my life as an opportunity to either do it better this time or screw it up royally. If I do it better, there is nothing to regret or worry about. If I screw it up royally, then I have another chance to do it better or screw it up royally.

So, think of life as being presented with a series of blank canvasses on which you get to paint something and that the results can be anything from wonderful to horrible and the odds are good that each painting will be at least the same as the last and has the real potential of being something wonderful. So, pick up the brush and get to work.

To start over exactly what, if you don't mind asking?

I used to get comfortable (and stagnant). Assuming life would plod on and I would be content was my way of life for years. I liked that. Over the past dozen years, I don't know what might happen, but when it happens, I adapt. Being homeless, jobless, knowing no one, or any combination, I dive in and find out that I can swim.

Not scared , just not motivated enough .

I never started in the first place.

I'm on my 5th career, Funeral Director, FEMA Mass Fatality Responder, Radio Shack employee/manager, AARP Employment Specialist for the SCSEP Program and now Customer Solutions Representative for Career Source Brevard! First two were close to the same but I had never held a retail job in my life when I worked for Radio Shack. Divorce after 36 years, job lose, all new experiences and still having fun.

Yes...I was, but in doing so, I have found more than I ever thought possible! There is a kind of peace, that truly is...happiness! But, you must keep moving through the briar patche(s). And, not ‘fold up,’ because it seems so-o hard! Working ‘that hard,’ has much value! Make plans, but do not try and control all outcomes! To much control, prevents your expansion!

I'm not scared, but I'm reluctant to inflict my cynicism and doubt on some innocent nice guy.

I've had to start over several times. I'm not so scared of it now. It's just another chapter in the book.

Somewhat. I'm not looking forward to the whole nervous feeling and the wondering if I'm making a complete fool of myself, but it's part of the journey.

Somewhat, yes. I'm recently divorced (only marriage) and I'm almost 50. It took me a really long time to find my ex-wife and I fear it will take a long time to find someone else I could love.

Out of necessity, I've done it a couple of times. It's always scary cuz you have no idea how things will play out, it's natural to be scared when facing the unknown. Remember this, there is no courage without fear, and no true success without the possibility of failure. None have a sure or certain future or obvious path, and failure along the way will indeed follow any significant change. You control only two things, your attitude and your persistence. Use them to overcome your struggle. Good luck. ?

I’ve done it a few times and once I got started it turned out to be for the best.

Yep totally

No , in regards to marriage ive never been married, ive heard there is always uncertainty, i Do wish you luck in starting fresh tho, its a necessity i know, when you are getting divorced ,its a sad thing..

If your going thru Hell, Just keep going.

I've started over so many times, the status quo is what scares me. 

"It is our history that makes us what we are today, and each day forward" -Me, 6/10/16

I have a large book of famous quotations, although the quote above isn't in it, and I likely will never be famous. I wrote that one day because it was something I felt, and continue to feel. We each have a unique history that has shaped us into what we are. All the bad as well as the good. Take what you have learned from the past and use it to shape your future.

I will get some rebound on this 'Get knocked down 5 times, get up 6.

in my experience, 'starting over' has been a gift that was brought to me by those I trusted (and shouldn't have). At 45, I've started over too many times, between moves for jobs, moves for family, moves for loved ones, etc etc... and I don't have any more of that left in me.

I'll take what I have, build what I can,and find a way to be content. Just my 2 cents.

Hell yes
Glad I did
Still scary

Being with someone for a lengthy amount of time, then suddenly finding yourself alone can be a frightening thing, indeed. But you learn to live without. You learn to fix things yourself. You find ways to occupy your time. For me, I think I have always been on my own, even when I was in a relationship. So now that I'm truly alone (I lost my ex two years ago), it feels natural, though lonely at times. But you go to bed, wake up, and it's a new day. 27 years is a lifetime; I've never been with anyone that long, so I imagine it must be hard on you. But we all have to get on with it. Who knows? You may find your sudden independence exhilarating, and what a liberating feeling that can be.

Scared, but not to that degree.

After my divorce, after a hellish marriage, I knew I needed to get back with my ex like I needed a hole in the head. Nevertheless, I've missed being married, in and of itself. Marriage is a great anchor, and I've felt like a migrant ever since.