My father died today. He was 90 yo and had been in poor health for the last couple months. He battled health problems for the last couple years. He had always wanted to be a judge for his professional career and he got to live his professional dream. He was a state Supreme Court justice for over a decade. He died in the hospital after spending almost all of the last five weeks in it. My mother had a massive stroke in 2010 and died in 2013. My father provided most of the care for her during her last two years of life at their assisted living facility, where he lived by himself until recently.I am glad that he was able to enjoy a 90th birthday party last Oct. where he could see so many of his friends and family while he was still in decent health.

He and I had a lot of conflict during my adult life, and I don't think he ever really understood me or accepted me for the most part, but I am glad that as he got very old and his health declined, that I was able to forgive him for a lot and accept that he was not going to change. That allowed me to be more involved with him and be supportive to him and my mother after her stroke, then later as he lived as a widower.

He was not good as a young parent, but he was an improvement on his own father, I can say that from experience visiting my grandfather as a kid. Still, the experience of growing up in my family was such that I am glad I did not have kids, even tho that is probably going to cost me as I continue to get older. I still think I made the right choice for me and hope I can meet a woman who is right for me. If she has adult kids, that may be a bonus, but I'll be grateful for just a compatible partner.

Coupled with my own health issues that began in 2010, my late wife's dementia that began in 2011 and ended with her death two and a half years ago, this last decade has just been one big kidney stone that I can't wait for to pass in 2020 when the new decade begins, if not sooner. I have seen a lot of bad stuff in this time and tho I already believed it, it has convinced me even more that there are worse things than death in this mortal life.