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19 29

G'day everyone, just thought I might pass on a bit of reasoning LOL) that I heard from Evangeloon yesterday afternoon.
Please, please ensure you have clean, dry pants handy to change in to when you read this.
With the recent rainfall we've been fortunate enough to getting the snails are not only attacking gardens but also breeding.
I don't have much of a problem with them thanks Joanna the goanna but it appears they are causing Evangeloon a problem.
Sitting and enjoying the relative peace and quiet in my usual spot, I was interrupted by Evangeloon from across the dividing fence.
" Have a look at this," he yells, " I've found siamese twins snails."
Yep, you guessed it, 2 snails mating in the way they've done for millions of years.
Silly me replied, " They're not Siamese twins, they're mating, snails are hermaphrodites, each snail is both male and female, just like slugs, most Earthworms, etc, etc."
The look of shock and horror on his face was unbelievable and then he replied, " They are an abomination to God then, God made everything as either male or female, these snails have defied God and embraced the ways of the Gays and Lesbians, God will send them all to Hell if they don't change their sinful ways."

Triphid 9 Oct 10
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4

My ducks and chickens work hard to keep my yard abomination free 🙂.

Joanna the goanna can easily eat about 20 snails a day but she also has my resident family of Shingle-backed lizards to contend with with it comes to the snail problem.
This is a photo of Joanna the goanna, she kind of 'adopted' my house and yards after I found her suffering from starvation and thirst trying to drink from my garden pond about 8 years or more ago.
I snapped the photo when my young nephew, Henry, had his very first encounter with and was hand-feeding her.
Joanna is now a very 'plump' goanna who measures out at approx. 6' long from nose tip to tail tip.
Not bad for one who was only about 18" long and near to death when she first arrived.

Your ducks and chickens eat christians?

@Triphid She's beautiful! What a treat to be able to have her around.

@Triphid, @PondartIncbendog I suppose they would if I chopped them up into manageable portions 😯😁.

@Joanne Yeah, about 99% of the time, except for when she DECIDES that it is fun to sun-bathe on the front path and refuses to move when visitors arrive.
Though, having said that, she IS a great Anti-God-Botherer deterrent when she does it though.

0

There's a reason I'm an introvert. They live among us.

6

I think that I may come to visit you and make friends with your neighbour and drive him bananas. I am good at that.

This !!!🙌🙌🙌

8

I wonder what he thought when his dog was humping his bunny slipper...

Or his leg....😂

Probably enjoyed the cooling wet goo on his toes.

3

Tell him, on the stroke of midnight, he can find worms mating with slugs. That will blow his mind.

And mention that trees are doing the same thing every spring! Hold that, he might cut them down in the name of The Lord...

6

Ask him if 'god' has a penis. That will stop the conversations.

3

Actually, this is sad. Funny, but sad.

So, its life?

1

LMAO awesome

bobwjr Level 10 Oct 11, 2020
5

😂😂🤣🤣 😳 It's too hilarious not to be a joke. Now seriously I have met people like that, I feel your pain.

14

It’s time .
It’s time for u to wear a leopard thong , some pink sandals , and shiny red lipstick . U got to do it man .
Tell him that u are gay and finally out and about .
He ll sell the house and u ll get rid of him for life .

That is a GREAT idea!

Like that idea but with my body shape these days, hmmm.
Maybe I should play ABBA music instead of the usual stuff that I do when I'm in the garden working OR even give him a copy "Priscilla, Queen of the Desert" as a Xmas gift?

@Triphid I like playing do wop of the sixties. But only when I'm pissed. So, I listen to it every day. Neighbors told me they heard the coyotes howling. I am insulted. I was singing.

@Triphid Hedwig and the Angry Inch would also make a nice (insert pagan holiday name here) present. Gotta cover all of your bases when trying to make him go a bit bonkers, right?
While I feel bad for your dealings with him, they do bring me a good laugh while I shake my head.

8

Careful! It is known that many of those Christians who are most vocal in denouncing homosexuality possess hidden homosexual tendencies.

@racocn8...that is so true. Many become priests for that reason. They bend for each other😂😂😂

5

For those who may be interested these are actually photos of the House of the Evangeloon, taken over the dividing fence.
Before his mother bought if for him the place was as neat and tidy as a pin, had luscious green lawns all around the house and yard, flower beds and vegetable beds front and back.

Ewww

@Triphid yuck 🙄🤐

@TimeOutForMe He immediately tore up ALL the lawns and gardens with a Bobcat when he arrived and set about paving (??) the grounds with a mix of finely crushed rock and cement powder which he saturates with water and then compacts it all down with this noisy, petrol powered compacting device.
A few weeks ago, when we copped 2 and a half inches of rain (our first decent rain in nearly 5 years), because he, who claims to be a qualified Stone Mason and Builder, excavated the level of the ground down to about 18"- 2' sloping from the street towards his back fence SUDDENLY discovered that his entire back yard was underwater.
Now he has solar panels on his roof and wants to me to cut down a Cyprus Pine tree, at a guess 100+ years old, in MY Yard no less simply because it throws a shadow over HIS solar panels in the very late afternoon.
The tree does NOT encroach on his property in any way, it is a home to birds all year round, stands, roughly, some 30 feet high and it has a trunk diameter of approx. 4 to 4 and a half feet.
He has 2 chances of me cutting it down, S.F.A. (Sweet F--k All) and Bugger All.

@Pralina1 Exactly my own thoughts.
The centre photo is his Evaporative Air Cooler system btw, he has spent, in my rough estimation, well over 2,500 dollars so far on replacing parts, the Water pump, etc, etc, and still it doesn't cool his down during the summer heats of 40 or more degree temperatures.
IF he listened to me, he could have replaced it completely, as I did with mine when the original one failed after 30+ years of service, but purchasing a frame, etc, from one that had been removed from a house that was being demolished, revamping it slightly with new filter pads and in summers having a house where the internal temp. is a nice comfortable 18 to 20 degrees Celsius and NO messy ducting, etc, covered with tarpaulins and masses of Duct tape and rubbish.
My revamped one cost me $300.00 and a few hours of work.

@Triphid yip you don't have to cut your tree down. As you say it doesn't encroach onto his property....and no municipality can make you do that either. He should've positioned his solar panels smartly. He has created a slum on his property. If he still had his garden, the water would've seeped through the ground but "the clever" got himself flooded on his own property.. This man needs to admit to himself that he needs to see a psychologist or perhaps straight to the psychiatrist.

@Triphid So, Mr crazy pants installed solar panels under a tree? Smart guy.

@PondartIncbendog No, not exactly under a tree, but knew my Cyprus pine was there long before he installed the panels.
Kind of like his 'brilliant (LOL)' idea, a few years back, of putting roof insulation on the OUTSIDE of his roof to stop the heat from warming up the corrugated iron sheeting on the roof..
He even used sail cloth to hold it down, that lasted until the Spring when we get very strong, gusty winds, then everyone spent the spring try to clean up his insulation from their yards and gardens.

3

Maybe he'd like to have a "little" talk with them?

I reckon they'd make far sense with their silence than he could with words any day.

5

Snails in Hell, the movie!

Or, " Tales from the Sex Lives of Escargot" LOL.

Bailey and Daley, The Gay Snails - the cartoon

3

Change the subject on him a bit and ask him why did god create mankind and then populate the earth through incest. In fact, god tried this 3 times. This will now bring us back to the sin that made god want to destroy mankind. It must be unknown because it certainly is not sexual.

1

Lol

6

Why are the “good Christians” alway those who are obsessed with the activities in the genital region of anything human or otherwise?

Answer: because they are fucked up in the head! 😉

4

"I have made up my mind, and I'll thank you to not confuse me with facts!"

3

Maybe he should demand gawd change the designs....

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