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Single or Partnered, looking or not?

Curiosity got the better of me, wondering how most members stand re dating/availability and so on.

  • 47 votes
  • 14 votes
  • 8 votes
  • 5 votes
  • 7 votes
Rugglesby 8 Dec 30
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36 comments

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0

Single. Not really looking anymore. Not in the United States anyway. The market here is far too competative for anyone who doesn't look like a movie star and have the game of a pick up artist or at least puts six figures in the bank each and every year.

I know I'm far too fat and fugly to find a partner whom I would find attractive enough to turn me on romantically here in the United States. Nor has any woman of average to above average attractiveness from here in the US ever shown even the remotest romantic interest in me. I can't make up for my laundry list of physical flaws with game and/or money, so I'm basically a lethal combination of negative traits which puts me in the category of the unfuckables here in the US market. In fact, I might just even be the club president.

Searching for romantic partners here in the US is a waste of time for me. I tend to do much better in over seas countries where women chase men more and the US dollar goes far enough to put a sparkle in any pretty girl's smile.

14

Single, looking but I am cognizant that the odds are hugely slim. When I first considered divorce I read an article that said most men in their 50s and above were looking for "nurses with purses". That might not be entirely true, but I've had a couple of dates expire on me. And being a liberal non religious person in a conservative state, the available pool of men I want to spend time with is incredibly small.

Omigosh, @HippieChik58, you've lost two while dating? That's gotta be demoralizing. I agree with @Noellemay, you seem really cool, so maybe start dating them younger?

My kids gave me guidelines. They have to be close to my age than to my oldest daughter's age. I was 26, nearly 27 when I had her, and I will be 60 next week. So right now I can date as young as 47. Meh, I don't really like the younger guys, they usually come with youngsters at home and I don't have an interest in dealing with puberty once again. Or child support issues.

12

Single and looking; however, I am realistic in that it is very rare to find a compatible individual for long term companionship near me online, yet here I am. 😉

10

I have been single for 5 years. I was dating someone locally but it became a long distance thing-first- him traveling to China for work, moving to California and then Washington DC. He was 25 years younger than me. A political science professor at Tufts when I met him he now works for Brookings in Washington, DC. Recently he remarried his wife and 8 year old daughter. We are still Facebook friends. He would visit me as I was diagnosed with leukemia 5 years and became a good friend as I went through chemo, radiation and bone marrow transplant. now that I am healthy Iam meeting new people and hope to meet someone who is looking for long term.

9

I've been widowed for eleven years following a happy twenty year marriage. I found child rearing and dating did not mix, and so have not been actively seeking during that time. That's not to say that I would reject anyone who, despite my not looking, I might connect with during the course of living my life.

Meanwhile, I am ALWAYS seeking interesting people to befriend or chat with, online or off.

Zster Level 8 Dec 30, 2017
8

I’ve wanted kids since before I knew what that entailed. I was 12 and held my cousin for the first time and fell in love. Watching her grow up has been magical, so this getting divorced at 32 and being single for 5 years has forced me to consider the possibility and desire for my own children and what I really want out of a relationship and what I’ll put up with. I am single and have open eyes, but I don’t know if looking is the word.

8

I’m a widower with an 11 year old daughter.
My wife passed away in 2014. I was involved for two years only to be cut loose because of our religio-political differences.
Life can’t be this barren.

Oddly enough I’m from SLC as well.
And it was worse than you can know. But life goes on.

It was in 2014. My daughter was really more affected. We were in a he midst of a divorce.

6

Single, but not looking.

5

Single and looking, however I am looking for a companion NOT a life partner. I have been married three times, and am not looking for a fourth. I just want someone to do things with and watch the world go by. I do not need someone to complete me, tell me what to do, or take over my home or family.

5

Newly divorced, so I'm not sure if I'm totally ready yet. I think I'm just ready for some fun.

I'm in the same boat (divorce not yet finalised) and I know exactly what you mean - I'm not sure I've finished picking up the pieces yet, but there's no harm in seeing what's on offer! 😉

I agree totally. I have been single so long that I feel like a virgin again. I am nervous about it but want it sooo bad too

4

I actually would love to see an Atheist community, a town with Atheist run businesses and schools and homes and yes, farms, all located in close proximity to one another. It would be so refreshing ( at least to me) not to have to hide my true state of disbelief from my neighbors for fear of the ones with a more baser nature deciding to put the fear of God into me!

and when you meet in the street you could say. "May evolution favor your descendants".

@Rugglesby I am seriously considering uprooting from where I am and moving closer to a more urban area near my other atheist and agmostic friends.

@misstuffy We have pockets within some communities that seem more religious than others,
Ozzies were mostly Christian no matter where in the world they came from , with modern communication technology, the faith has become somewhat dilute. Country areas that have not had a great influx of new residents are still avid church goers, ethnic pockets are quite vocal. We can go weeks with religion being mentioned. Everywhere I go, Churches have been sold, converted into houses and restaurants. Muslims and Sikhs seem to continue building grand places of worship. We have a higher than average Sikh population in my region but they rarely mention religion and all I have met are nice people. Sadly they often get confused with Muslims and cop some abuse.

@Rugglesby I believe here in Iowa there was a sikh temple parishioners attacked by someone mistaking them for muslims, even if they were muslims this guy had no right to attack them. Where I live it is fundamentalist Baptists and Jehovahs Witnesses, in other words just shsoot me now!

I love animals and would love to have a small farm of them to play with all day. I am a spiritual person raised in the Bible Belt. I have no respect for dogmatic religions. I am a Spiritual person and I believe there is a GOD, but not in any belief system but my own. I am also a mystic of sorts, I have about 40 years of astrology, I am an empath (not ask for, just a gift), I am telepathic or psychic, however you may see it. I dislike organized religion. I find the people hypocritical, judgmental, and some downright spiteful.I do not go to a regular church. Everythime, I go outdoors and see GOD's perfection, I am in church. I am at a spiritual place I like. I would like to find some kindred spirits. I am also open to meeting for coffee or lunch, something like that. I have been single now for a very long time. It has occurred to me that I am getting older and there just maybe that special someone out there. My last boyfriend was 18 years ago. We were together 1 year out of the 4 we hung on. He was a Master Sergeant in the Army. I just seemed t become content on my own and before I knew it, 18 yrs flew past. SO I thought I could find some kindred spirits and perhaps that special someone. Also, i a not into the occult. I can read tarot. /none of this makes me an occultist. I do not believe in all kinds of gods. I do believe there are evil and satanic people running around. I do not believe in curses, but the mind is powerful. I always counsel some to be careful you just may get something, but it many only just be similar to what you wished for!

@BettyColeman I do not believe in a God or Gods. The Bible is laughable in my opinion. As far as farming livestock goes, this is a difficult way to make a living. I work an off farm job as well and it is definitely not an easy way to make a living.

@misstuffy I must be older than you. My mom/dad worked. I was the oldest of 4 children. I started babysitting and other chores at 7 years old. I got married when I was 18. I always worked except part of the time I carried my 2 daughters. That ended after 2o years. I am an industrial engineer. I am not rich, but I have some pension and Social Security. Enough that I don't get any government freebies which has never been a concern. When I was speaking of a little farm and some different animals, I would not have had it to make a living. I would play with and take cae of my animals and oour home everyday. My grandfather had a farm. I know that is hard work. They had milk cows to, so you don't walk away when you feel like it. I grew u[p visiting a couple weeks or a month here and there growing up. I use to ride the horse they had Trigger who was quite contary. I would take the guys ice tea when they were baling hay. Luckily I lost no ice tea. I usually had problems with Trigger on the way back home. What a horse! lol You have a much harder life. I was planning my fantasy.

@BettyColeman Having a hobby farm/acreage sounds up our alley. I work, building and engineering parts on Experimental Aircraft but it does not pay well and now with an allergy to the chemicals my days working on planes are numbered so my farm must make a profit.

4

Thne only reason I say not looking is because I am incredibly busy. It is sub zero weather here and I raise livestock. Got some getting ready to have their babies any minute. Also I think I may be one of a very few farm based atheists here.

not sure re the farm based, I am no longer, but I know well the restrictions having land and animals places on one, good luck.

@Rugglesby Thank you, I will need it, our high for the day will be 3 below zero

4

I love the feeling of learning someone new. Even as friends, even just to talk. I like women my age, with the character and experience that comes with maturity.

4

I'm content being single. I like it in many ways. But deep down I can't imagine anything better than having a child. And while I used to think that was selfish, my own take on life (we are borderline miracles in the grand scheme of things) has me thinking otherwise. The unconditional love for a child is appealing, as is giving life in a universe largely devoid of it - at least "locally".

Wow, I never realized how tough it could be as a single mother. I know a few but I don't think they have the same challenges. Not to "solve" anything here, but it sounds like you're a great mother and may need to make some more time for you. It should be okay to do things for yourself that make life a little less lonely. Thanks for the thoughts... cheers!

4

Not desperate, but yeah, looking.

never be desperate it's not a good way of choosing

Update 3 months later...no longer looking. I found him. Thanks, Zoosk...and academia. He is a math professor, my age, approximately, liberal like me, and NOT RELIGIOUS!!! ...in Louisiana, no less. Hey! Maybe there IS something to miracles, lol!

3

Partnered up, cowboy! 😉

Thank goodness my sidekick is brilliant!

Sadoi Level 7 Feb 10, 2018
3

I kind of like being part of this community, I am interested if the right person comes along but, I have no desire to date someone hundreds or even thousands of miles away I don't see how that can even work, I might be old fashion but I don't believe you can really get to know someone without talking to them face to face.

3

I am looking for friendship.

AnnaT Level 4 Dec 31, 2017
3

I am single and I was told that at my age I should remain single. Well....

bullshit do what you feel

@LeighShelton I am the type of person who lets things come to me.

I agree but there is no too old bullshit

3

I think I am having a rather confused moment.

That is always a good sign that you are trying to be Honest!!!

I understand that! It is hard.

@GipsyOfNewSpain I have been single since 1985. I had maybe 3 more serious relationships. They last about 2-4 years. Then we would decide we made better friends. I have dated, but I never lived with anyone or they with me. I have been single so long, sometimes I really want a special male partner and another part freaks me out. The last guy I dated was a master sargeant in the army. We date about 4 years, but when at about 2 years he went to Afghanistan. I was really happy. We were just friends a 2 years in and quit our sex life about 1 year in. Woody drank an awful lot, smoked weed, and played kareoke everynight if he could. City Mouse. I like to go out, but I loved times at home to. He was seeing his old girlfriend before he went to Afghanistan. I did not care. Then I did not have to bother with him. Not a pleasant relationship. I did save his life. He had things stored at my place. He had a strok in the basement while getting stuff together. Are you really a gypsy? I always have a memory of a past life. Now, i know you think I am nuts. Anyway we toured Europe and we were in Spain. I like spain. The weather was nice and in the evenings they would build a fire and I would dance around the fire with my castinets. I told some friends this and I said I was Romany. I thought maybe Romania. I don't know. Since then I saw a couple documentaries and it startled me. They calle themselves Romany Gypsies? I honestly am not crazy, but a card reading, psychic, empath, etc

@BettyColeman I thanks him and everyone that ever served for his service and sacrifice. I love all europe I behaved as if the whole mediterranean was mine. I know you are not crazy... you been there before and I will dance to the sound of any woman that can castinets... we may be the only one here that know that feeling. And I thank you for bringing that feeling to me now.

3

In a relationship. Not looking. Just here to have an intelligent conversation. When is there ever going to be a site that doesn't have Dating site in the description. After you sign up.

MoniB Level 6 Dec 30, 2017
2

I want a friend with benefits but mostly the friend part and I demand upfront honesty and respect. id like to have my house and they have there's. boyfriend and girlfriend if you will. I never say never and of course, i would have a fuck buddy or a one-off but it's not what I want. in any of these or other scenarios honesty and respect are a must.

1

I really like the community. you can chat about just about anything. It is a pleasure.

1

Sorry and respectfully, I hold sex as a sacred part of my intimate life, therefore I am not willing to be anyone's fuck buddy. I do wish you well and luck on your journey. I am truly just not that kind of girl, but I think that is a personal choice and none of my business.

1

I am single and looking/not looking much. Hoping they find me. I guess that sounds lazy. But if they read about me and really check me out, they would know more whether they wanted to date or not.

1

I am somewhat like you. Just some geography and perhaps an extra child.I have been single since 1985. I have had relationships but not lived with them. Some reason or another we usually mutually decided we were not suited. I would like to find that special someone if he is out there, but my last boyfriend was 18 years ago. The energy of the relationship was much too dramatic for me. I do not think i would give up my freedom, but I would be a loyal partner and friend.

18 years is a while, my last relationship ended 13 years ago. Freedom is a big issue, freedom to be yourself.

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