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What has been the dumbest religious comment/response/statement you have ever heard personally?

Mine happened this week and I'm still shaking my head about it.
My kids and I spent Xmas in New Orleans and spent xmas eve watching the lighting of the bonfires on the Levee.

A coworker asked me about it when I got back and I was explaining the pagan tradition of the bonfires and said, "..before the church turned the winter solstice celebrations into Christmas..."
She cut me off and said, "December 25th has ALWAYS been Christmas"
I said, "No it hasn't, but as I was saying...
She immediately said, "Yes it has, check your calendar."

She is a professional healthcare provider with advanced degrees and her answer was "check your calendar".

I had to walk away because I really wanted to smack her in the back of the head.

Crimson67 8 Dec 31
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27 comments

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16

A few years back, an east Texas state representative said during the state senate debate on bilingual forms, "if the English language was good enough for Jesus Christ, our Lord, then its good enough for everybody"

That just makes my head hurt.

Must have been imbibing too much in the frack water! smh

@Qualia she also was quoted as saying Obama was a thief. Her reasoning was, "he said he had tried marijuana, and there's only 2 ways to get drugs. Either stealing or selling your body". Cant argue with logic.

@Benmonk Good lord!!!!! 😉

@Qualia these are true stories. I don't know if they are commentaries on relgion, gocernment, or Texas.

@Benmonk the liberals in the state call these people "The Texas Taliban"

I with there was a "laughing my head off" button on here!

9

Most annoying answer to most of my hard questions is.
You got to have faith.

That is all they can say when asked or confronted with the facts...

"Faith is believing something you know isn't true"*Mark Twain

8

Once in 9th grade a friend and I were called into the principals office so he could accuse us of being "followers of Silus", apparently an imagined demon in Satan's army! This because we were found listening to AC DC.

@SteveB LMAO!!!!

@SteveB I couldn't guess. He said we were "Followers of the demon Silus". Dumbest Christian statement I've ever heard.

Ooo, "Followers of Silus"! Good band name!

I hope you didn't laugh and tell your friends.

you're on the highway to hell

6

Some people hold on to a belief because it fulfills something within them and when that belief is challenged they get defensive and protective.

Just shake your head and walk away from people like that, they will never choose to believe you.

My silliest one is when I mentioned that no one really knows when Jesus was born since there is no documentation or mention in the scriptures. I wasn't given an answer just told to go home and pray. I didn't. 🙂

Betty Level 8 Dec 31, 2017

"Jesus" was likely born in spring anyway. That's when shepherds are in the fields with the sheep because they're having their babies. In late December even in the Middle East its mighty cold, too cold for the sheep to be out, and too cold for the shepherds.

@HippieChick58 - one of my muslim students (an educated teacher of english) told me proudly that jesus couldn't have been born in the winter because it says in the bible that the date fruit was on the trees - but of course he didn't see the irony of picking the bible apart but not the koran......

6

The comments I have heard from Fundies - "Birth control should not be available to single women. If women want to be sluts, they deserve to be punished with childbirth." And how about this one - "Abortion should never be allowed. It is better to have battered children than to allow killing them in the womb."

SKH78 Level 8 Dec 31, 2017

There are sooooo many other reasons for abortion. Is the baby going to be healthy? Is the mom going to be able to carry the pregnancy? And it all comes down to my body, my choice.

That's horrific!

5

Had a co-worker tell me that NASA is keeping the truth about the earth being flat to keep us away from our Lord and savior Jesus Christ.....dead serious.... thinks NASA is working for the devil

Well, in defense of your co-worker, Pooska, the earth is flat in the bible and on maps. Maybe that is just to have us avoid looking all around our textbooks. IDK? LOL

4

A revival preacher said, "If the King James version of the Bible was good enough for Jesus, it is good enough for me".

PEGUS Level 5 Jan 4, 2018

As an ex-Pentecostal I have heard that same very remark. It shows how ignorant they are. Jesus had no bibles. People did not "talk strange" in those days, and the remark about a loved one dying and they say "god needed another angel" is straight out of 1900. I am so glad I got away from them.

4

Reminds me a court judge who said to the counsel for the defense, 'my mind is made up do not confuse me with the evidence.'.....

4

“Well, of course, your Christian. We live in a Christian country!”

4

It is proven you can Educate Ignorance into People. And that is the Hardest to Remove.

3

That's what I love about these people. They're so sure of things they know nothing about.

3

That's a great example of just how close minded and shall I say IGNORANT Christians can be. I would have gotten into her face but I think smacking her upside her head would have been more satisfying. 😉

SamL Level 7 Dec 31, 2017
2

I've found that the typical believer has no knowledge of the true history of the "christian" church. Easiest argument against any argument that threatens their core beliefs are simply not true.

2

There's stiff competition in this category, but the ones that come to top of the list for me are "She's in a better place now" or "God needed another angel" in reference to my wife dying at the age of 52. I just want to take a baseball bat to these people when I hear this shit.

2

Wow! I thinking she also voted for Trump. Amazing how otherwise intelligent people can be so Batshit crazy stupid.

2

I have very Christian friends who want me saved, they leave my company with a new thought to think over, each week they return with a new crazy answer to last week's question. I should write down their responses and make a book. The last one was their reply to "what does the old and new testament teach about rape and slavery" there reply was that they don't say anything about either of those subjects. I asked them to come back when they've read their books. They've not come back yet.

Dav87 Level 6 Dec 31, 2017
2

So many examples come to mind, but here's a recent one.
My appendix ruptured in October, and the doctor literally said it was "a real mess" to clean up. He told my mother right after surgery that I would likely have some resulting complications. Happily, after four nights in the hospital with IV antibiotics, followed by ten days of two oral antibiotics, I had zero problems. I attribute this success to intelligent, well trained professionals, great medicines and my general good health. My mother gives a lot of the credit to prayer. She's a nurse, by the way.

dkp93 Level 8 Dec 31, 2017

Horrific. Poor medical professionals must be so fed up with people attributing their success to prayer. I always wondered by religious people don't just dispense with doctors and just pray. It would free up a lot of space in hospitals....

1

There's no point arguing or debating with "believers" because their minds won't allow them the possibility to consider what they've been taught may not be based on fact.
Best to just smile and walk away.
Actually, in a sense though, you are both right. December 25th on the Christian calendar is an observance of the birth of Christ. It was not considered his actual birthday because according to prophecy the Messiah had to be born under the sign of Pisces.
Christians displaced the two pagan high holidays at the Winter Solstice and Spring Equinox with Christmas and Easter but still kept many of the pagan traditions.

1

I was talking about how a young dolphin found with pectoral fins was not really a sign of evolution and this person said, Well, if you believe in evolution.

1

I've found that just because someone is in a highly skilled medical profession doesn't mean their education is well rounded.
My own SIL is a perfect example, a cardio vascular tech, young enough to be my daughter, she's still in the stone ages with basic information..... and she's religious AF which is so much fun. @.o

Hard for me to choose a dumb religious anecdote said to me or mine, there have been so many.
One that stands out in particular was while attending nephew's christening and my MIL's best friend put me on the spot asking "when are YOU going to baptize ____?"
Me: "I'm an atheist so I'm not"
MIL BF: "Ooooh come on, no you're not!"
Me: "Yes I am and no I'm not going to do that" smile

It was the one time I saw my MIL turn white as a ghost & give the most sincere apology ever.
"I'm sooooo sorry".
Me: "meh"

1

Modern medicine has benefits and detrimental. To pursue dietary and natural remedies is common sense to me. Look at the opioid crisis we are now experiencing. Sometimes mothers little helper doesn't really help!

if they'd just give out opium no one would die and some damn good stories would be written. read chasing the scream . the story of the war on drugs from 1921

1

Lol, yeah, that's a good one. Can't recall any good personal anecdotes, but I like how the Church handled it when medievil scholars pointed out that everything Jesus said and did can be found in earlier writings attributed to earlier prophets, you'd think if Jesus eas the one and only, he'd have something new to say? Well, turns out Satan knew Jesus was coming, so he sent out earlier imposters to confuse people! Impeccable logic, problem solved. @@

0

Check your calendar? She is also a very ignorant person. Her belief in Caesar Crisp has poisoned her mind.

0

my friend is an astro physicist and says there are people in his profession who are religious .AND chris hadfield is a canadian astronaut and he says half of the astronauts believe in that voodoo. !!!!!

If you are an astro physicist and claim to believe in gods you have not been trained properly. You will find no answers in a god.

0

My favorite author is Robert Heinlein. My favorite character of his is Lazarus Long. From the notebooks of Lazarus, There is no proof of anything after death. There is no proof otherwise. So, why fret about it? Sooner or later you will know for sure.

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