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Have You Ever Had A Sexual Relationship With A Co-Worker?

They say, "Never mix business with Pleasure", which i believe is a good practice. However,

When was a resident in medical school i would take on jobs here and there to help pay for school.

I secured a job at a small laboratory not far from my college campus. A friend put in a good word to the manager there. I arrived to the interview and there i find a really attractive individual. I could feel the sexual tension between us. So i get the job and i start. Things seemed normal for a wile until i found myself working late to fix an error i had made.

To my surprise, the manager was there late in another office and everyone else had gone for the evening.
The manager came in to the office where i was to find out why i was here so late and i explained that i had made a mistake and was trying to fix it. The manager helped me correct my error.

Long story short, we hooked up right there in the office.
These hook ups lasted for nearly 2 weeks straight.

Week 3 approaches and something changed. I notice the manager would talk to me less and kinda have an attitude so i decided to "maintain military silence" in a sense to keep the drama down. This just added fuel to the fire and made a bad situation worse and more tense.

I had decided that i was going to resign because there was no returning from this nightmare. I waited until our usual staff meetings on Fridays, to make the announcement and submitt my resignation.

Before i got the chance to make my announcement, The manager says " Tim is resigning and his last day of employment is two weeks from today! We all wish him well in his future endeavors!"
I was like....." This Mother F%#@&#! "

So, This is my one time laps in judgement mixing business with pleasure!

I have never done it again!

Tell Me If you have ever Had a Sexual Relationship at work and your Thoughts....

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twshield 8 Jan 5
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31 comments

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6

Yes. It's not usually a big deal in most larger companies, I'd wager, although having sex with someone of a different ranking in the org structure could be downright dangerous for one's career.

this hook up was CLEARLY a power thing. I'm sorry you learned the hard way BUT your manager was using sex as a 'club' when you choose not to go the drama route or be intimidated you had to go. My experience was with someone of equal footing and it was awkward at first but we talked it out as adults and we stayed friends. I never hooked up with a go worker again tho.

6

WAY way way back in the dark ages of my life, when I was very young and stupid, and in the Army, I did hook up with a fellow soldier a few times. Once or twice it was a superior. No lasting repercussions, someone was either transferring in our out, or I was too oblivious to notice.

I am proud to have served. I learned a great deal from the Army on how to be a leader and how NOT to be a leader. I think it made me a better parent and better employee.

5

Do you mean "just sex" or dating/relationship with sex? I dated a guy at my restaurant job back in college and ended up happily married to him for twenty years.

A few years later, I got intimate with a close friend at my current scientific job. I got cold feet, asked him to slow things down (he wanted a committment of marriage after three months of dating). He went ballistic, had to be escorted off of company premises, I had to file a report with HR. It was both scary and humiliating. I wished I'd never gone out with him.

So, my record for work sex: awesome vs nightmare is 50/50.

Zster Level 8 Jan 6, 2018

Yeah, I had no idea how emotionally unstable that guy was. I lived in fear for my family for a few years after and have not dated since. The kids are nearly grown, though... (:

4

I wouldn't call it a "hookup" but,I've dated people I worked with before. It's never really been an issue,The relationship either outlived the employment situation or we were able to go our separate ways and still be civil to each other in the work place.

My mother met my step-father at her job. They've been married for 28 years.

Duke Level 8 Jan 6, 2018
4

I've never hooked up at a job BUT I've found most of my partners through work and have often worked with my partners.

4

Too close for comfort. My mother did... here I am. That will teach her a lesson.

4

If I could live my life over again, there'd be a lot of young ladies who would've gotten laid that didn't the first time around.

3

One time, it was awkward at first as I was the one to end it but we talked and smoothed things over and remained friends.

3

I served on a public health care committee and observed the Executive Secretary being promoted to Director of the non profit organization. I observed her off duty having and intimate encounter with one off the powerful board members. I knew the board member and that he was engaged to a women that I also knew. The fiance of the powerful board member forced him to resign the committee because of the relationship with the female director. The other board members decided that the female Director had to go and was out of a job with in days. She was using sex to gain a better paying job and it back fired.

3

I am straight and have never worked in anything but male dominant professions, so it has never come up.

I don't think I would if it did.

3

I had just divorced when I went to work for a small business. It turns out the employer had just divorced as well, and both of us were missing the comforts of the marriage bed, so after a few weeks, we ended up hooking up.

It changed the whole dynamic of our working relationship. Our personal interactions and our working expectations led to conflicts, and the whole thing became a nightmare.

I had moved to take the job, and I ended up having to relocate once more and find other employment. Learned my lesson. Bad idea.

Donna Level 6 Jan 13, 2018
3

I met my second wife at work. It took four years before we actually hooked up, but it was great. She became my wife, and mother to my two boys. Unfortunately, I lost her to leukemia 15 years ago. I think if you are going to hook up at work, you really should get an idea about who the other individual is. Is he/she just looking for a fling, or is he/she available for a relationship. I think one of the greatest things that happened between me and my wife during those four years before we hooked up, is that we both wanted to hook up but didn't let it happen. We would go out to dinner and just talk about life. We were both going through divorces and she had a son, so there was a lot going on. Just jumping into bed right away probably would not have worked out as it did with us waiting. The greatest thing was that after four year when we finally did hook up, it was mass fireworks.

3

I went through pretty much the whole office... I work from home now so it's just me and my right hand... 😉 LOL

3

I had a relationship with one if my soldiers when I was in the Army in 1988... I was a Staff Sergeant and she was a Specialist. I wasn't married and she was... her husband was also in the Army and had been cheating on her while he was in Korea. It only lasted during the time she worked for me. She eventually divorced him and we have remained friends, though not stayed in touch over the years.

@twshield, thank you for your thank you! 🙂

Thank her for her service, as well.

3

Yes I did, it turned into a relationship, we would both be the first at the building and have coffee together in my office. She would bring breakfast and we would talk for about an hour before the rest of the co workers arrived. After about 6 months she seduced me and we shut my office door and had at it. Unlike a few experiences I have read here ours was a good one.

3

I would but I haven't

2

Usuallly when I work somewhere, I try to keep it professional. That’s just me, though.

2

I have met partners at jobs a few times. I met my ex-husband working together. None of these were great relationships, but it didn't matter to much as far as the jobs went. I think the relationships outlasted the job in most cases though. I wouldn't want to just hookup with someone from work. It seems like it would be awkward afterward.

MsAl Level 8 Jan 25, 2018
2

My first husband was a coworker.

Kanda Level 5 Jan 20, 2018
2

Have fun where you find it or where and when it finds you

2

When I've been involved with a co-worker, the relationship has always preceded the employment relationship for at least one of us. And I've sought workplace separation when that's happened.

2

During my teenage years, I was a waiter at the lical IHOP, and probably half the girls I dated worked there.

I might be a little more cautious now.

2

Yup, done it. Sadly I was guilty more than once. Not going into details though.

d_day Level 7 Jan 8, 2018
2

Ugh... Yes, and never again. I dated someone I met at work and that turned out to be my shortest, ugliest relationship--after which he tele- stalked me for a year. So glad he left town. I don't understand why there's not more of a taboo or stigma against dating coworkers--and I don't just mean across authority; I mean anyone you work with. If fall in love and a relationship is thatimportant to you, one of you can get a different job. Otherwise, why bother jeopardizing your employment or working environment? 2/10 would NOT recommend.

I can tell you why there's not more of a taboo on it. If it weren't for coworkers some people would be forever single. Wages have fallen so much in relation to the cost of living that many many people do nothing but work. They don't have time or money to go out and meet people in more traditional ways.

@d_day that (sadly) makes a lot of sense! TYVM for pointing it out!

@d_day On-line dating...

2

I did once. It was my shortest relationship (2 months - even my first relationship was a little over 6, and every other one has been a year or more straight or off and on after nearly a year), but very nice while it lasted. It ending had nothing to do with the fact that we were co-workers.

Ending was confusing and disappointing, but yes, I focus on the rest of it.

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