If you are a good Christian you will study "to show yourself approved"...If you are a good atheist/agnostic you will study to show proof. I wonder if he is agnostic; maybe he's just trying to get somewhere in between like on the fence. My DH was raised pentecostal and his best friend was athiest. Depending on the situation sometimes he would say he was pentecostal and sometimes he would say he was athiest! He just was what he wanted to be at any given time. We did not argue the point. But if it is important to you that he and you be the same you might want to take a second look at does it really matter to you what he believes because I doubt he knows.

Why does religion, or lack of it, or whatever - have to play a part in your relationship at all? You're both on different paths in that subject, not a big deal. Why do you have to agree? Do you both like the same foods? The same people? Do you both agree on literally everything else? As an atheist, I firmly believe I have a right to not believe as much as others have a right to believe, or even be unsure about it. You two are sharing your journeys with each other - you're not on the same journey. Let him find his way. He will find his truth, let him enjoy that journey for himself. You did, maybe it is his turn. <3 Love and support to you and him! <3

Alrighty. Well honestly your boyfriend sounds pretty similar to myself. I grew up Jehovah's Witness and my father was initially Catholic but converted(then went back to Catholicism after my parents divorced. Lolz!).

Anyways, for me finally taking the past steps from agnostic theist to agnostic atheist didn't come from speaking to atheists. Giving up your faith in favor of logic when faith is such a huge part of your life is difficult. I fought tooth and jail to keep my faith. What put me over the edge was after studying the topic for a while I started talking to other theists as a skeptic. I kept my belief out of the conversations and simply asked questions from a neutral point of view. Listening to their answers, mind you many of which I gave to atheists asking the same questions, I began to realize just how utterly ridiculous they sounded. When I have those answers I rationalized it and did mental backflips in my head for them to make sense. Hearing it outloud from someone else I found it was a lot harder to rationalize those claims.

As an atheist, it should be irrelevant what he does or does not believe. Is it import to you that he share your view point? If you had children would this cause trouble? If so, maybe move on. If not, let him believe how ever he sees fit.

don't worry, people of the same religious believes tend to disagree as well.

At first I just looked at your "top" question and was going to say don't argue, your differences aren't substantive, they're epistemological.
However, as other commenters are saying, your guy seems intellectually unqualified or attitudinally unwilling to actually own, articulate and defend agnosticism--which simply says, we can't really know, so I'm not committing one way or the other. It SHOULD also imply skepticism about the existence of a god, but that depends on to what degree one takes "creation" as evidence for a "Creator."
You should have him read Hume's definitive dialogues, especially the one demolishing the analogy relating "God" to being a master watchmaker.
As you point out, your bf shrugs off the infinite regress argument against the idea that a God of some sort is necessary as "cause" of the universe. But even my son, at age 8, considered the idea of such a necessity specious and unwarranted. Almost all kids, as far as I can tell, initially say "Then who created God?"--then later they succumb to societal pressure in many cases.

Don't open this subject. If you can.Tell him to respect your view, and you will do the same. Don't try to change his opinion. If he want to talk about this, tell him to do it just if he can explain and sustain with evidence.
Otherwise, he can not try to.

Compromise is Essential for a lasting relationship, whether religion, politics, or theories of child-raising, to name just a few. Some things you can successfully "agree to disagree" and then leave it alone. I believe politics & religion, or lack of it, or the form it takes, should be best served by giving the other person's views' respect. Pick your battles!

The title says, "Boyfriend is agnostic". NOT. He is definitely religious. I have known people who stopped going to church and yet associate themselves with some denomination of christianity. Your boyfriend seems to fall into that category. You might need to start seeing him as a believer and not argument the existence of God/god. If this is the person with whom you want to spend the rest of your life, start by getting out of the fog.

Why must we keep explaining and providing proof that our "beliefs" are the absolute truth? It's a never ending pissing contest and considering neither side has anymore factual data than the other, where are these "great debates" going anyways? I feel this is all very simple- keep working towards the truth and don't be afraid of how you have to get there. Be it by peering through space or some goddamn Divine Intervention in a bathroom stall, be open and willing to admit that you might have been wrong OR if evidence shows you might have been a little more right, be ready to support those whose worlds have just been flipped.
"Prove it, prove it, prove it". How can I prove to you why I believe classic country music is the absolute best and your KISS album is crap? It is my belief and it's none of my business what you think of me.
Don't get me wrong- I love sharing and exchanging ideas and stories but not if those things are later used to ridicule my intelligence (or lack of) on a social media site while I'm secretly praying in the bathtub because I'm too afraid of your judgement if you knew I kinda a little bit wondered if there was a god. Poor guy!
Here's the important stuff- is he kind? Does he have your best interests in mind? Does he have a job, is he worth a damn in the sack? And does he like KISS? Ugh.

If you are arguing abut religion while you are only boyfriend and girlfriend, I would suggest finding a new boyfriend, If you ever have children together it can rip you apart.
Plus he sounds like a believer trying to lie to keep you as his girlfriend.

Let it be. In the words of the Beatles. Just let it be. You have to let others believe what they want and rejoice in your common love. If you love them, just say you look at things differently and just love them more for being who they are.

Reading your story, I believe your boyfriend to likely be an agnostic theist. And I agree with what a lot of the others have commented. You have to be pragmatic in deciding how much this will effect you. I'm sorry you're going through this.

Among atheists, it's become accepted as gospel (pun intended) that matters of religion should be considered logically. But we don't think about everything logically, do we? We don't think about love logically. We don't think about family logically. So if your boyfriend is merely open to the possibility of God, if he doesn't affirmatively believe in it, then why is it so objectionable that he thinks about it in an illogical way? Why is it so important that his thoughts about religion be different from how any one of us thinks about the love we have for a spouse, or the loyalty we might have toward our family? Human beings aren't always logical, but as long as your boyfriend is a good person, what should it matter that he leads with his feelings or his right brain on matters of religion?

Read "The Righteous Mind" (Why good people differ about politics and religion) it will help both of you understand the other and might help you get along easier.

Any relationship where the two people don't agree on basic principles of life would be less satisfying than being on the same page with someone. Hopefully he is a good cook, good in bed, a funny guy, or treats you nice. Otherwise, it is a tough road to walk down alone.

Religious conversation are often challenging at the best of times, being agnostic, it's conversations I prefer too avoid.

I understand why he defends it so, all though he really doesn't understand it. it's his blue print, his values. our values are handed down to us by our parents and grand parents, society plays a smaller role. we all defend our values sometimes literally to the death. We rarely ever sit down and examine these values and ask ourselves do they still make sense to me. We don't write out our values the values that make sense to us today. get him to do this with you it will be an eye opener for both of you.

that doesn't sound like hes agnostic at all lol

Since you love this guy then I would avoid the subject. He knows how you feel and that is now with him to think about. For some of us it takes time to come around (decades in my case). Since he is not a bible basher, then why don't you just enjoy yourselves in all of the wonders that you have before you - friends, music, nature etc. etc. (it's a long list!). Unless his religious beliefs are a real impediment to your relationship, then I would just get on with living.

He doesn't sound agnostic. He's fooling himself or trying to please you by saying he is.

I'm married to a believer. His reaction when I first told him I was an atheist was that he just couldn't wrap his head around it. He is not a churchgoer, however, nor does he act like most Christians. It rarely even comes up. I think he just likes the idea of a god and a heaven. He will say a short prayer at special meals, and sometimes I say it, only not to God, just a blessing or a hope for blessings. We worked it out by giving each other room to believe as we do. I don't think this would work at all if he was trying to get me to go to church or "get right with God" or whatever, but he has never tried to bend me to his way. If anything, I have tried to tell him why my way makes more sense. It's crazy. We just love each other, going on 40 years and it just doesn't come up that much. At one point I thought to ask him if he wanted last rites or a religious funeral when he dies. Just in case it's him that goes first. He said yes he probably wanted the last rites, but no he doesn't want a church funeral. And about 25 years ago he showed up with a small crèche to add to our Christmas decorations. Every year I get it out, along with all the fun, pagan stuff I enjoy, and find a spot for it. I think of it symbolically and don't get hung up on why I'd rater not have it. If you love each other and he isn't going to turn into a nutcase about it, you can certainly get past this difference. If he wakes up one day and decides to drag you to church, or gets angry with you for your atheism, those are deal breakers. But, you can let him have his doubts and his illusions as long as they don't do you harm. One thing I did was read the Bible and talk to him about the things I was reading as I read them. He listened and didn't try to defend, and I read and tried to pay as much attention to anything good as all the horrible stuff in there. It made for a good discussion, and he didn't have to slog through it. Good luck. It's hard to respect religion, but I have found that when it shows up in those I love, belief can be respected as long as it isn't used against me.

Why not celebrate your differences? It would be truly boring if we were all the same. The only thing you seem to be in disagreement over is the possibility that a god or gods exist.

There's a lot of religion that's provably ridiculous. The Garden of Eden. The ark story. Young Earth Creationism. But surely the point of whether some external influence created the universe and the first spark of life within it is pretty much moot this far down the line.

I don't see how you can make this a rift in a relationship any more than a preference for strawberry jam over marmalade.

I see plenty of evidence that there is no benevolent God supervising this world at this point, and nothing to support the notion that there is one. But to deny the origin of the universe, when all that exists are theories to explain it? That's a big leap for me. I think it's perfectly reasonable for different people to have different ideas.

You just have to avoid talking about anything to do with religion. You can have fun together, have sex (protected) and go out on dates. But a long-term serious relationship is going to be very difficult. I am 64, a dedicated atheist for 5 years and was disabled in a car accident 30 years ago. My "boy" friend is 70 and became a not so dedicated Mormon about 20 years ago shortly after he became disabled. We have a ton of friends in the disabled community but NEVER talk about religion. I guess being as young as you are and serious about your relationship it will be impossible to avoid talking about religion. Good luck in working things out.

My first question for you is, do you feel respected by your boyfriend? If you continue to be an an atheist, will he respect your decision to the extent that the two of you can agree to disagree? If not, and without mutual respect, you are engaging in a relationship that will be prone to failure and to repetitive cycles of unproductive conflict.

Avoid this kind of conversations.