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Have You Ever Been Molested As A Child?

I know this is a very sensitive subject and, it can often be very painful to talk about or re live.

For those of you which I communicate with regularly, you have probably saw my comments on being a former catholic.

I was raised catholic and attended catholic school up until I moved to United States, Texas.

In catholic school me and my friends were like prey for the hunters. The priest would try every thing imaginable to create a situation to get you alone with them.

They would try to fondle us or give us a massage if we were upset or crying. on field trips, who ever the priest would sit with, they would attempt to fondle.

After our soccer games, they would hover around the shower so they could catch a glimpse of our nude bodies. The particular parish I was at had a few good priest but most were predators. If you tell the good priest what is happening, they would never say anything because they are in the minority.

If there was an incident and it became public,you would know because the priest would just be reassigned to another parish and replaced with a new predator.

I had 2 friends and we would practice a buddy system and looked out for one another. Its pretty sad when you have to deal with this as a kid.

I have been fondled and forced to fondle priest but I am very thankful that I was never involved in any oral or intercourse. Some of my friends and classmates were not so lucky.

Please tell me if you have ever been molested as a kid.
If you would like to just answer the survey it would be greatly appreciated.

You don't have to tell your story because I understand how hard this subject can be....Trust Me!

View Results
twshield 8 Feb 20

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24 comments

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8

These numbers are alarming. Life is difficult enough growing up. I'm thankful I missed out.

glad you missed it too!

7

I was brought up Catholic, and my experience (thankfully) wasn't that most priests are predators — but some do exist, for sure. There was only once that I thought a priest might have been getting a little carried away, wrestling with us altar boys, but nothing actually happened so much as a sense that the priest was a little too into it. The Church's history of sheltering pedophile priests, ignoring the problem, and denying wrongdoing is unconscionable, and the rhetoric that came later was disgusting: rather than making unequivocal statements about how the lives of many children were ruined, their innocence stolen, etc., the former pope, Benedict, and other officials within the Catholic Church always talked about how it hurt the reputation of the Church. Yeah, it did, but that's not the point. That should never be the point. For that to even make it into the public statements is egregious. Not only is it a self-serving sentiment, it's a genuinely stupid thing to say from a basic public relations standpoint — which shows just how evil their view of the situation is, because they can't even help themselves from bringing it back to the "reputation" of the Catholic Church when they talk about the victims.

glad you were ok

@twshield That's just it, I'm not that OK, still.

@Acharyasman55 I had counceling a wile back for a different issue but this issue came up as well. it was very helpful to talk to someone. you should consider it.

6

6 years - from 8-14 years of age, by a christian cult of extremely wealthy peoples. They had festivals and taught and included us in sexual practices most will just maybe read about. It changed me forever and It's hard for me to develop a healthy identity, still.

@Akfishlady Sorry that happened to you and thank you

Sorry to hear about your horrific abuse. I currently am supporting someone who went through the same within a cult.

6

Nope. Grew up in a rural town of 20 or so people and never got touched by a stranger or family member. I did have a fellow ask if he could wash my back in the shower while serving in the military, told him no.

good! Thanks!

5

Yes at 7 years old and also physically and mentally abused by my mother throughout my childhood.

@Shelton yes they do indeed. I am good in my life now but it definately affected my schooling and people in authority growing up.

sorry for that! its really rough when its a parent. I hope you are doing well

@twshield Hey yes, I am good I am a survivor ..

@Tiffanny awesome!!! you are awesome!

Ditto...by both parents.

5

I also grew up Catholic and lived in Texas. I also went to parochial school and was even an altar boy. But I have never been molested nor have my siblings. It is hard to understand how this can happen and how it effects people. I do know that the Catholic Church is hurting (good). The numbers of men going into priesthood is way down and often a priest has to serve several parishes. The bind is the loss of priests, the reduction of people becoming Catholics (which is why they are preying on the people in developing countries) and this increasing scandal. The church feels it needs to cover up it;'s misdeeds simply to stay viable. I, for one. hope they fail on all counts.

I just saw an exposé on VW. The information started leaking out how the exhaust numbers didn't match up. The company initially went into denial and redirection mode. When that failed it built new, better devices. In the end the whole house of cards crashed (unfortunately it was shown that BMW and Mercedes also have these devices). This is normal behavior for large organizations including the religious ones.

4

I was never "molested" but beaten horrendously many times, burnt a couple of times and even stabbed twice, but never molested. I have all sorts of scars and as a young child thought many times I was going to die, I never once received medical treatment as my parents feared us kids would be taken away.
Sadly I have 2 young female friends who were and I was for support years later when the police finally took things seriously. The father is in prison now. A couple of cases I know involved boys and sports coaches, no legal action at this stage but the guys are doing it really tough well over 30 years later. I don't know if it means anything, but I tell these kids (they are kids to me as I am twice their ages) to look at it as seriously unfortunate, along the lines of being born with a disability. Through no fault of their own their lives are harder than others, but it doesn't define them. I know you are dealing with so many thoughts and emotions, you are brave to confront it and I sincerely hope you can overpower it all. I know it is not the same, but my world came crashing down when my kids got to the age of my early memories.

wow very sad. On could consider it torture what you have endured. Glad you are ok. Its sad what we put our children through. I thing parents should pay more attention to behavior changes in their kids. We have to break the cycle. Damaged kids often become damaged adults unless the cycle is broken.

4

I don't know if it visible to others but my screen shows how I voted

Only you can see how you voted.

@Paul628 thanks

3

My brother was molested by a DEFROCKED priest who was never criminally proscecuted thus allowed to open and operate a "Boys Home" in Stuart Iowa several years until the Des Moines Tribune newspaper "outed" the rapist on the front page.....in turn my brother molested me apparently in ways he learned from the former FROCK RAPIST. ... ......... most people would consider the precise pains inflicted upon me or my brother "minor" and only the false esteem still bestowed upon clergy makes molestation much worse. .... ........a fitting epilogue to this Iowa story is about Jack Cafferty now an MSNBC "news" show host. ...........2011 as I recall he was WHO TV NEWS ANCHOR NBC affiliate at the very end of the 10:29 broadcast. .... following sports late breaking reports fill in the sign off "chatter" and his last night employed there A WOMAN RAPED @ Drake University was reported. ... ........... the last words heard by viewers were from CAFFERTY : " CONFUCIUS SAY:'when rape inevitable, lay back and enjoy.' " snicker face Jack camera zooms in and horror face of co-anchorette. ....then opening scene of late nite TV talk show. .... .......... papers and radio&tv all reported condemnation of Cafferty for days on end. ... ......... but why did this scum get a job anywhere in USA on camera or a live microphone ?

wow that is really sad! its like a vicious cycle! thanks for sharing!

3

A developmentally delayed teenaged neighbor playmate took my temperature rectally when I was about 4. Not sure if this counts, really, because I think he was probably just legitimately playing "nurse"--like a child, commensurate with his mental age. I don't think there was anything sexual or predatory about it, and neither did my parents--but I never played with him again...

perhaps not. I am glad you didnt experience anything worse. Thanks for sharing.

3

I have some sexual hang-ups, and I was told that I was abused (I was never told any specifics, so I don't know if it was physical, sexual, or what) but I can't recall any sexual abuses.

Seeing this post breaks my heart, though, because I feel like I'm in the minority. There are so many stories of hurt here, and so many more that won't get told, and it's fucking awful that this isn't an uncommon story. What is wrong with our species that so many people are able to stand up and say, 'yeah, me, too'?!

This isn't something NEW! This isn't something where people with an over-inflated sense of morbid superiority can say, "See? Look at the world today! The world has gone straight to Satan because Gawd isn't in schools and homes! We didn't have this when I was a child!".... yes. You did. And every generation before us has.

What the hell is wrong with our species that so many adults will prey on children? That so many men prey on women?!

Has anyone got an answer, because I'd like to find a real thing to focus on to bring an end to these stories.

I'm sorry for the pain all of you have suffered. Words are insufficient to the task of comforting any of you.

Well said and thank you sir!!!

3

@silvereyes include medical training programs in that too The list could go on forever,law enforcement agencies etc etc

very true

3

From 9 to 14 and although the fucker pretended to be a devout christian, it had nothing to do with any church

When i arrived in america i became baptist. The men would try to Mentor you and slowly try and get into your pants. It was much easier to scare them away compared to catholic school.

@Shelton it happens more than most people want to think about

3

Yes, but I didn't go to church.
Just some POS older guy that lived across the street.

Hate you experienced that Paul and thank you for sharing!

Sorry to hear it happened to you also always more difficult for a man to talk about their negative experiences.

@Tiffanny I thought it over for a while before I posted.

@Paul628 Yes its difficult when you write it down in view of others it seems to expose you somehow. Hope you are ok..

@Tiffanny I am thanks, it was a long time ago.

3

Six years of my (and my sister's) life, non-stop, by my mother's second husband (aka the monster).

Stranger rape at 17 (still a child, technically).

wow. This saddens me to hear alot of this coming from parents! I have a sister who put her boyfriend before her kids and as a result, my niece was raped over and over. So horrible!
would be nice if the choices we make, only affect ourselves!

2

I was never molested as a child. I do believe I managed to dodge an attempted abduction - I was walking home from school in the rain one day and a total stranger pulled over and tried to get me into his car. I aimed the point of the umbrella at him and he changed his mind and drove off. But, I digress. I personally know five women who were molested as children.

glad you were ok! its pretty common...pretty sad..

2

Yes, my maternal grandfather from 4-12 yrs old. All the family kept it quiet, even my parents. I later found out on my father's deathbed that he'd raped my mom from childhood throughout her teens; she ran away from home on the night of her high school graduation. That should have told the family something was going on. Ironically, he was the music leader in his church for many years. I will never understand my family's secrecy. No way in hell would I keep such a secret! Is take the child to the police station. All of them should have been arrested as accomplices for aiding a criminal!!! To this day, I have no contact with my relatives and my girls have been kept well away!

sorry you went through that but i am glad you have broken the cycle with your kids!

@twshield thanks! Not bragging, but friends say I'm a good mom, and my girls write me love notes. I don't spoil them rotten. I'm not trying to be their best friend. I just try to be the mom to them that I wish I'd had, being there for them, no subject taboo. I rarely think of my own abuse anymore unless someone asks questions like this one. I felt capable of leading my oldest daughter through
the spider web and out of the low self esteem and fear she had after working in a brothel from age 4-5 yrs in China. At least I can offer her my own experiences and how I broke away. She's growing into a fearless, strong young lady who doesn't put up with much shit! She says (sarcastically) that when she gets married, she'll have her black belt by then and the only psycho bitch in her family will be her, lol.

@Lewellyn3 Thats awesome!

2

Probably. While seeing a babysitter when I was very little I completely stopped shitting. My mother didn't send me back. The same mother who had almost no sense of boundaries and engaged in what felt to me like emotional incest.

wow. Hope that is all behind you, and thanks for sharing!

2

Yes, at the tender age of 10 by 3 men who were devout Catholics.

wow so horrible. Thank you so much for sharing this!

2

Yes, from age 4 to 11.
That is all I will say.

Thanks for sharing and sorry you when through that!

@twshield it had nothing to do with catholics

@Donotbelieve Ok. I am still sorry. I decided to make this post because i had a dream about when i was as kid in catholic school.

@twshield I was just being precise

2

I wasn't molested, but my dad's boss got highly inappropriate with me once.

Glad things didnt advance and you are ok!

@twshield The experience definitely had a lasting effect. Thirty-five years later I'm still extremely uncomfortable around men who are drinking.

@PhoebeCat understandable. I tend to be on edge when i run into catholic priest

1

Yikes! Molestation is more common than people realize as it is a taboo subject tho less so as in the past. It may be cathartic for you to express your experiences. Statistics can give us a glimpse into how common this is. 25% of girls, 15 % of boys have reported molestation. Now the question is how many have not reported, & how many have encountered more than one incident, & how many have encounter more than one incident by different perpetrators? I hope you are healing from the trauma. You are not alone. You are brave to discuss it. You are articulate & can help others to heal. As my father experienced the many rapists in liberated France after WW2 , by American GIs, he raised me to strike first if my instincts warrented self defence. I have had many incidents of attempted asssault & attempted molestation but have never hesitated to strike & thusly have always been the victor tho trauma does follow. From the school bus driver to a man sitting next to me in a dark movie theater. Walking to get groceries or one of mom's boyfriends. Being a mean girl has helped me remain victorious & reletively unscathed. Except now I have issues relating to men in general. Oh well. Life is suffering as the Buddists say.

1

My father would always walk me up to bed it was three flights of stairs with no light fitting for the first flight so in the dark, When we got me to bed we would both read Alice in Wonderland, him pointing to each word and me chipping in with the words I knew. then he would say OK Myfanwy (joke name) II'm going now I'll see you in the morning and he would turn out the light and pretend to go out of the door -opening and shutting it but he never left my room and my experience was when the father left he let in the night monster. My mother knew exactly what was happening - I left home at fifteen.

wow. i am soo sorry you had to experience that! parents are suppose to protect their kids from predators and not be that. I hope you have made peace with this and it has not affected your life!! you are very courageous and a strong woman! Thank you for sharing!

Thank you; yes after I left home I really found lots of interesting people and my life opened up. I think my dissociative identity disorder saved me a lot, years later, because it was only when I could cope with it that all my history came flooding in - strangely I was a lecturer in person- centred counselling at the time - 'a bit of physician heal thyself! going on there' But i was in a good place to heal .

0

It was a fundamentalist Christian sect. We were molested and raped multiple times for years upon years until I was able to get out. I'm gonna stop there. A bit to raw

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