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What is the best way to excuse a Johova Witness from your front door?

Rammy 4 Feb 25
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43 comments

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0

Say "I'm a Witch." They'll cross the street when they get to your property line.

9

Them: Did you find Jesus?
You: I didn't know you guys lost him again.

Hahahaha!

7

Answer the door naked drinking a beer

good one - I think i worked for me - but not totally nekked and stoned lol

4

If I'm busy, I tell them, "I'm not interested."

If I want to talk to them, I tell them I'm an atheist.

If I don't want them to come back, I tell them I once was a JW and disassociated myself, which is true. They aren't supposed to talk to disassociated (self extraction) or disfellowshipped (kicked out) people.

4

Tell them that you're not interested in their stupid, Bronze Age superstition.

4

I love these comments already! the quickest I ever been to get rid of them. Is when I stuck my head out, say sorry not interested but thanks anyway and I closed the door. But I gotta admit I love a good argument. When ever they come to my property they get an ear bashing of science! ???? next time I am going into a Satanic lingerie and ask if they want to be apart of the swingers club.

#spreadingthegoodword

Rammy Level 4 Feb 25, 2018
4

I lived on a posted, private road. The first time I told them they were trespassing. The second time I told them if they came again I would call the police and press charges. The third time I called the police and pressed charges. They stopped coming after that.

3

Despite the winged terracotta temple dog on my doorstep, they're slow to take a hint.

3

I don't say anything, I just close the door. This also works for cable people.

@MissKathleen Nothing worse than dirty vacuum.

3

invite them into the orgy, tell them the human sacrifice is about to begin.

3

Answer the door naked

Answer the door clothed, then start getting naked.

3

I invite them in then tell them before you tell me all about it lets all take a shower. They don't return

2

I loke to invite them in and discuss their religion frankly. They never seem to want to come back after that.

2

They don't seem come my door anymore and I actually miss them. They were great !! They always seem come just as I was about wash my car or mow my lawn and I would get them help me. Not sure why they don't come and visit me anymore 😟

2

I just tell them I'm a wicken and they almost run away??

2

Tell them to go round the back door... when they do, answer it and tell them to go to the front door...etc, etc, etc..

2

Bird shot 😉

2

Tell them to bring Jesus to my door if they'd found him. I need proof not conjecture.

Gohan Level 7 Feb 25, 2018
2

I tell them, "oh, I'm sorry, we're pagans." Then close the door. And lock it.

2

Tell them you are a Scientologist

2

I follow "I'm not interested" immediately with closing the door. I never give them time to respond. Now I have a satanic looking gargoyle looking out my front window by the door. I haven't had a holy-roller come to my door in over 10yrs.

2

"I was just about to go looking for a sacrifice. Come on in!"

2

I've been told by my nudist friends that answering the door naked works every time. I haven't had the courage to try that yet.

wear a skimpy loin cloth

1

Same as a Quaker confronting a burglar - "friend, I wouldsnot hurt thee for the world, but thou standest where I am about to shoot!

1

Answer your front door naked

A woman who does housework naked told me she saw JWs approaching and opened the door that way. They haven’t visited her since then.

1

Haven't had this problem in a loooong time.
I credit this to the fact that the last time we were subjected to True Believers, my wife set Zorak, our GS loose.

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