Agnostic.com

91 2

As an atheist, I think Homosexuality should not come into mainstream. What's your take ?

No offence, but my opinion is homosexuality is psychological. I'm straight turned from homosexual, it all happened accidentally. I went through the studies, none had a proof that it's genetic. I've only one explanation to what happened with me & i.e. homosexuality is psychological.

  • 0 votes
  • 7 votes
  • 172 votes
sourceofdesire 6 Nov 18
Share

Enjoy being online again!

Welcome to the community of good people who base their values on evidence and appreciate civil discourse - the social network you will enjoy.

Create your free account

91 comments (51 - 75)

Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.

2

As my 10 year old daughter said, "we shouldn't worry about people who love each other mummy, but those that hate each other". If the love is between 2 people of the same sex, it's still love.

Or, honestly, between multiple partners of whatever sex. Tho I have little tolerance for the FLDS church & lifestyle, it is more the way they treat children & women as property, & the way it is such a pyramidal hierarchy that turns me off, (let alone the church teachings, but that's another matter!) rather than polygamy. Again, my bottom line has to be "consenting adults".

@phxbillcee Funny how polygamy only swings one way - the male way.

Doesn't have to, tho I agree it usually seems to. I can see a strong woman having multiple partners & them loving it!

It is a religion and it enslaves women and children for a men's racket.

2

Why should anyone have to hide who they are just because it might make some people uncomfortable? It's not criminal behavior.

2

I've always thought that the 'born this way' argument was a massive cop-out. Almost an apology. "I've tried to be the person you want me to be, but I just can't help being this broken thing instead. It isn't my fault. Please don't hate me." Who cares whether it's psychological? Who cares whether it's a choice? Frankly, I don't want to see the genetic aspect delved into too deeply. That paves the way for embryo screening. Viable lives flushed away because they might turn out to be same sex attracted when they're older.

I'm essentially bisexual, but with a very strong preference for same over opposite. Raised by a Catholic mother, it was very clear that if I could be contented as a practising heterosexual, that's exactly what I should be. She wasn't anti-gay, but it was only acceptable for those who couldn't possibly handle being straight, and it was very clear that she expected me to 'make the right choice.'

It took 40-odd years and a failed marriage for me to realise that I was actually entitled to go with my strongest preference. I've chosen (yes, chosen) to be a practising homosexual ever since.

Sexuality can evolve over time. It can also be conditional. Don't get me started on the straight men who love a bit of male anatomy, as long as you put it in a dress and some stockings. They're certainly not gay or bi in the conventional sense, because a fit guy in tight cycling shorts or a fireman stripped to the waist does nothing for them. They want the chocolates, but not the box that they normally come in.

2

As an "ex-homosexual", you left "the faith" because it distressed you horribly in some way.
The overwhelming guilt feelings that being homosexual caused you were derived from the fact that loved ones, friends, and even strangers were distressed by your sexuality, and this bothered you intensely, so that was your motivation to discontinue the practice. As a non-homosexual, your feelings of extreme guilt have now diminished considerably, and you find that your new sexual behavior is coming as a great relief to your associates who formerly were so put-off by your past homosexuality. This feels good, and as long as you feel this way, you are likely to continue to remain celibate (or putatively "heterosexual" ), because of how much it pleases your loved ones and those you surround yourself with. Living your life to please others WHO WOULD HURT YOU EMOTIONALLY IF YOU DID NOT is one way to find comfort in your life, and I'm glad it's working out for you.
However, you should keep in mind that sexual behavior is a fundamental physical and emotional human need, and suppression of those feelings may require the use of benzodiazepines or other pharmacological assistance, which is okay, I guess. There's also hypnotism. Can I just throw this out there:
Has anyone yet found the cure for heterosexuality? Or the cause? Because once these are thoroughly understood, I think that we'll be much farther along the road to determining the exact, scientific causes, and thus perhaps, a "cure" for homosexuality, too.
Best wishes to you with your newfound heterosexuality.
P.S.- Do they also have "conversion therapies"
available for people who are afflicted with
heterosexuality?

2

No offense but homosexuality is not specifically psychological. It does come in a wide spectrum. As such, psychology does have a role but so does biology. Your personal anecdote has no bearing on anyone else, even if it was believable, which it is not.

I'm sure that homophobia shows no specific preference for the believer but I do normally think that an agnostic or atheist would strongly question the prejudice behind homophobia and would easily observe that homosexuality can be spotted in people without them knowing it or at least openly sharing it. That feminine traits and behavior are found in men and masculine traits in women, only some of which are truly homosexual indication. It does make sense that if you understand nature, homosexuality is just one part of the bell curve. Nature would prefer heterosexual just because it means reproduction but a female with some small masculine traits but otherwise a feminine person who has offspring will pass both traits on to both male and female offspring and they may not be as clear as Mr Macho Man and Ms Prissy Girl when they grow up. Some might be a little on the fence or only attracted to the opposite sex.

If you understand that, then you have to acknowledge that your opinion about how someone else feels has no relevance except to you. Maybe they might be convinced to act heterosexual if they are really somewhat bisexual, especially if they are confused about what they are feeling. In the end, the same traits will manifest themselves, confusing them and possibly causing further problems.

What I'm trying to say in a roundabout way is that a homosexual cannot choose their sexuality any more so than a heterosexual person. So no matter how much you want to help them, leave them alone and mind your own damned business.

2

It's not genetic, but it's not psychological either. If you wanted to say it was anything I would say that it's psycho-social. However, ALL sexuality is a result of psychological and social situations and upbringings. I'm a sociologist, and a believer that we are born effectively tabula rasa, so we aren't anything at all until our environment makes us into it. Of course, there are differences that exist in people from the very start (genetics), but I don't believe that any gene, or set of genes, could cause one to be a specific sexuality or not, but I wouldn't argue that some people may be entirely non-predisposed to certain types of sexuality thanks to their nature, but realistically I still believe that sexuality, like all aspects of identity, are far more nurtured than anything to do with how you are born. So yes, I agree that homosexuality isn't genetic; you aren't born gay, but equally you aren't born straight; and I don't see why the fact why it shouldn't become 'mainstream' really - if people are happy being gay, and feel attracted to males (whatever the reason) then there shouldn't be an issue with it.

2

I really don't have problems with homosexuality I've been with someone who was but didn't know even though he later confessed to me but I've come to think it's really psychological.sometimes I ask myself what trigger someone to just tend n start having feelings for someone ur gender.

most people acknowledge these feelings from a very young age/the point of self awareness

1

"As an atheist"? I don't see what atheism has to do with your personal opinions about homosexuality. Atheism has no dogma like religion does that passes judgement on such things. So you are an atheist and a homophobe and there is no relationship between the two things. Every argument against tolerance of homosexuality that I have ever heard is rooted in religion. If there is a non-religious argument I have yet to hear it. But suppose that it is psychological. What other psychological condition warrants restricting the rights of people that have it? Who people want to fuck is entirely their own affair.

1

Probably from the environmental point of view it should become mandatory. No more unplanned pregnancies and ZPG.
But seriously what is your problem and what studies did you look at. Obviously not the bulk of the literature. As for your personal experience that would be easily explained if you were bisexual or sapiosexual. We all tend to have our preferences, not that they are always based on the configuration of someones genitalia but I can't figure out why someone else expressing their preferences publicly should bother you in the slightest.

Kimba Level 7 June 27, 2018
1

I don't know where you're getting your information from but it sounds as if its coming from out in the shed. Or perhaps in simple experimenting.

Homosexuality is real and it is in your DNA according to more than one scientific study. For example, "IT HAS long been debated whether sexual orientation is a result of a person’s biology or is determined by environmental factors and outside influences.

A new study in the US could bring experts a step closer to proving that homosexuality is rooted in a person’s DNA.

Research undertaken by North Shore University in Illinois claims to have discovered genetic markers that indicate whether or not a person is gay.

Scientists compared the whole genomes of around 1000 homosexual men and 1200 heterosexual men and found there were two specific DNA regions that differed between the groups.

One of the regions dealt with a gene that plays an important role in brain development and hormone production, which could also be linked to a person’s sexual orientation."

[news.com.au]

1

Come into the mainstream? What does that mean? Are you saying that homosexuals should not be allowed in public? Even IF it were psychological, are you saying that anybody whose psychology doesn’t match yours should not be allowed to live their lives?

“I went through the studies, none had a proof that it's genetic.” Lack of “proof” is not proof. Neither is evidence of absence. What “studies” did you go through? That also shows complete disregard for science in general. Genes are not the only story being told here. We’re talking about a facet of the human creature known as SEXUALITY, of which “homosexuality” is merely a subset. (Though studies with twins show that genes do, in fact, play a role.)

I’m not sure what your endgame is here, if you’re just trolling or if you’re... no, it sounds like you’re trolling. Scientific thinkers and educated people no longer question the evolutionary establishment of sexuality in its many forms, including homosexuality.

Another telling factor is if twins are identical they, if gay, tend to both be gay whereas if the twins are fraternal, (separate developing eggs); you can have one gay and one straight.

1

It depends on your definition of " mainsteam " . If you say the majority then thats never going to happen. If you say accepted by society at large then for sure. You say that you were homosexual and then turned. You fail to say how. Did you meet someone? Have an epiphany or what? and that is just you. One of the main things that bug me about religion is some bugger telling me how to live my life. Now you say that youve now rejected your homosexual past but that does not negate it, it was still you at the time. Should you (then) have been vilified, ostracized. penalized, discriminated jailed or tarred and feathered and run out of town on a rail? I attended a gay bar mitzvah last year. I say gay, his mom and dad were both striaght but the lad in questions choosen theme for the party was my favorite musicals. Nuff said, he is a really nice kid and I am glad that he can grow up and live in a world that will accept him for who he is. I remember how much the gay lad in my school got bullied and it is so much better now. I have many gay friends and each one has said " This is not a choice "
Many seem to make mistake of thinking it is a lifestyle choice because offten gay and lesbians sometimes do straight. Well guess what there are a lot of striaghts who sometimes do gay. My cat ate a broccoli stem last week, it dont`make her veggie
The US is supossed to be founded on life, liberty and the persuit of happiness. What gives you or anybody else the right to deny any adults their rights to the same. Even if it is " Psychological " ??

1

I think the variations in sexuality are natural--genetics, whatever. It has always been, so it must be. Telling people it's all in their heads is mean and just a way to control things not your business. People are tormented and die from being considered "different." Stop denying nature and all will be more peaceful.

1

As someone who identifies as neither hetero- or homosexual, may I say I find both to be unusual? Just because I wouldn't do it or understand it, doesn't make it wrong for someone else as long as all parties are consenting adults.

1

None of my business, bruh.

1

Being homosexual probably is psychological, but then again so is our taste in food, preference in literature, movies, drinks, friends, politics.... Honestly every single thing about us with the exception of our skin color, and organ disposition.

The point is, why on earth does it matter? So long as people aren't having sex in my lap I could give a crap less what they do behind closed doors.

On a side note I would object to straight people having sex in my lap, so there's that.

1

My first thought/response was fuck you and the horse you rode in on. I'll dial it back a bit and say, just like one's religious belief or non-belief, one's sexual preference is not my business. Love and believe how you wish. I will not mess with anyone over that and no need to mess with me. The actual laws trying to control sexuality are absurd and cruel.

1

Where I stick it or where I get stuck is none of anybody's business. That does not preclude me from enjoying all of life's benefits, as well as the rights guaranteed me as a citizen of the US.

1

Not sure why one’s non belief in a god should have anything whatever to do with one’s sexual orientation. It’s like saying that, as an atheist, you don’t feel that left handedness should come into the mainstream.

The only thing saying you're an atheist reveals is a non-god belief. Otherwise, you can be just as whackadoodle as the next person. However, the poster's attitude sounds very religious based to me. It seems as if he's saying he experimented at one time...IF he's truthful.

1

What does "not come into the mainstream" mean? You don't want to hear about it? You want homosexuals to go away, to be invisible? The reality of homosexuality makes you wonder about yourself if, perchance, you are wrong about it being "psychological"? I suspect your opinions about homosexuality have less to do with going "through the studies" and more with your personal self perception. Finally, what the hell does your atheism have to do with your homosexuality issue?

1

An increase in the homosexual population would unlikely be due to there being more homosexual people, rather that more would feel comfortable expressing their sexual orientation. Like Atheism, homosexuality is frowned upon by Judeo Christian standards. Many atheists don’t tell people they are atheists and many homosexual people don’t share that they are gay, in both cases to avoid conflict and/or persecution. In neither case is it wrong to be open about it. It’s also not wrong to keep it to yourself if you choose. No one who is gay is going to spontaneously become straight and no one that is straight is going to suddenly “turn gay” because they saw a pride parade orread a book or watched a movie with gay characters. That’s ridiculous.

You say you think it’s wrong for homosexuals to be mainstream, which I gather to mean you think they should be gay without anyone else having to know about it. That is horribly unfair and unreasonable. Should straight couples get to hold hands, have public weddings, kiss at New Year’s parties, talk about their wife or husband at work? If he answer is yes (which it is, if you were wondering), then the LGBT+ community equally has those rights. The fact that you are uncomfortable with it had no bearing on their rights.

1

I think homosexuality is already in the mainstream culture. Count the number of times you see it referenced in a single day (It surprised me when I kept track)...I bristle at the idea of lawmakers passing legislation aimed at keeping individuals from being happy.

1

I don't know why people are homosexual either, but my experience tells me that its not a choice. I had the good fortune to live in a hippy and gay area in the early 70s and met a lot of gay people when it was first becoming a thing people could be open about. I met a lot of people, men and women who were really wonderful but deep down they had a self loathing about who, or what they were. As one man told me "Do you remember your early teens, when all you could think about was girls? Well, for me it was boys. I don't know why, but that was how it was." His shame and self hatred made me see what an ordeal it was for him. Choice? If it was choice that would mean that any of us could choose tomorrow to be homosexual. Does that seem like a real possibility to most of us? No.

1

For the person who is concerned that if homosexuality is "mainstream" that more people will choose to be gay, I can only shake my head. What if there are people who could go either way? What if those people would choose to keep themselves hetero in spite of curiosity or longing because they were afraid? Are you suggesting that they would be better off if they never explored their curiosity or longing? Because why? Are you suggesting that the rest of us would be better off if that were the case? Again, why? How? Have you ever even met another gay person? This isn't hypothetical. What if you could go either way, but the love of your life turned out to be a member of your own gender? What if you were never, ever, attracted to a member of the opposite gender, but felt compelling desire for individuals of your sex. Would you want to not participate in society because of this? "Mainstream" is just saying it's ok for people to be who they are. Who cares if it's psychological? Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. What would you do to prevent it from becoming "mainstream"? Just accept people. Nobody queer wants your ass if you don't want them. So calm the heck down.

jmott Level 3 Dec 24, 2017
1

Sorry, partner, but there is mounting evidence that your assumption is completely off the rails. This doesn't mean that in some it may be psychological, because that remains a possibility. However:

[latimes.com]

[sciencemag.org]

[scientificamerican.com]

Granted, the issue is yet to be settled, but there is more than sufficient cause to consider your take on the issue as a minor possibility in isolated cases, but the majority of people in that group have been biologically produced and not by choice at all. AFA notwithstanding.

Write Comment
You can include a link to this post in your posts and comments by including the text q:4245
Agnostic does not evaluate or guarantee the accuracy of any content. Read full disclaimer.