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What is the best way to get rid of someone preaching to you?

On the subway the other day I started yelling loudly that if they kept losing Jesus, they should put his picture on a milk carton and leave me the hell alone.

By hereigoagain4
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67 comments

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12

Did you hear the following joke?

One day two people rang my doorbell and when I answered they gave me a blank pamphlet. I said "This doesn't have anything on it" One of them responded "I know, we're atheists"

BD66 Level 7 Oct 8, 2017

was it an unsigned first edition?

I kind of want to try that....

10

I tell them that I worship satan and I ask if I can eat their children. always fun.

Although "technically," atheists are child eaters too... so I could just go with that. But mostly I just tell them that I like to watch Fox "news" and then go out and club baby seals.

7

Just walk away and if you can't do that just ignore them. I personally love that type of conflict. I just keep my cool and ask the same questions I've asked every jerky Christian, Why do you believe and how do you know you're right. It always leads to faith and once you get there it's a simple matter of showing why faith is a terrible way to know anything. You won't convince him but you might have someone else listening that might be convinced. The big thing is no matter how angry and nasty they get you need to stay cool and non-threatening.

paul1967 Level 8 Oct 3, 2017
6

If they are Christian, I always go for putting my head down and reciting some Latin ~ usually gets them to walk away at a pretty quick speed. Thank you, ten years of Catholic school.

B99Nerd Level 4 Oct 26, 2017

Haha! Kyrie Eleison!

Dominoes Vobiscum

eh rapus rapus rapus... rapus rapus rapus amen... @btroje

6

I have a sign at my gate that says "I am an atheist. I do not want to be saved. Move on, Thank you!" Used to have another sign that said "Religious representatives and related propaganda are not welcome." Both work but I like my new sign better.

we're lucky , there's hardly any thumpers. around. a few girls all wrapped up and the occasional turban and they don't say much unless you engage them which can have rewards !

5

i bring my kjv to the door, i know it better than they do, i find educating them about the book i know they didnt read, to be the best way to stop their bullshit. i am also a transplant to the south, been here 24 years, from new england.

5

In a case like this I'm likely to use my sexual orientation to frighten them. I'll work a reference to my husband into the conversation. Since I am male there is a 67% probability their head will asplode.

good job

5

"No thanks". Then ignore.

4

I read a meme once in which the guy said each time someone came to him pushing their religion that he would try to sell them drugs which of course would function as evangelism repellent. lol.

4

I deal with random preaching with the question: do you believe in the power of Satan? They will of course say yes; I then ask them in a very dead pan voice,if they are a virgin? Most become uncomfortable at that point and leave. If they answer yes, I suggest I could use them as a good sacrifice, I don't no what to ask if they say no as that hasn't happened yet. Any suggestions?

Well, if they are virgins they can touch unicorns.

4

Here's my method. "Lo siento. No hablo ingles". If they speak Spanish "Ich kann nicht sprechen duetsche". German? "Wo bu shou zhongwen" Mandarin? "Je ne peut pas parle l'angais" French? "I don't speak English, then walk away 'cause I'm all out of tricks.

Lugo1993 Level 4 Oct 6, 2017
4

Depends on who it is. I am not a confrontational person so most of the times I roll my eyes when it starts and then tune it out. On FB I block a neck of a lot of pages.

DeiP Level 5 Oct 4, 2017
4

Don't give them the time of day. Turn your cheek and IGNORE them. Is this rude? It's rude of them to shove their feelings down your throat!

Jannabis Level 1 Oct 4, 2017
4

Carry around flyers with bullet points explaining why God isn't real\the bible is a horrible fairy tale they contradicts itself, list those contradictions. I had a religious roommate in college and she challenged me to read the bible. I read the whole disgusting thing. And made a power point with over 1000 reasons why the bible sucks/there is no God. It was great but on a floppy disc somewhere. Wish I knew where

Cakelady Level 2 Oct 4, 2017
3

I tell them I'm a Buddhist..

Buddha Level 7 Nov 6, 2017
3

I typically just ignore them. They get to live with that.

3

I like saying that I stopped practicing Christianity when I got it perfect. I then offer them advice.

Frankie Level 2 Oct 20, 2017
3

I think humor is the best way.

When they ask me if I've found Jesus Christ as my personal savior, I tell them that I'm already seeing a savior. He may not have the abs, but those extra hands give a great massage.

You could reply with "Oh my, you've lost him again?"

Or maybe, "Yah, he's passed out under the coffee table."

3

Roll on the floor laughing so hard you eyes start to water. No seriously, it depends on how they are towards you about faith and religion. I may have stated this in another post but I have a few friends that religious and they range from born again to moderate. I really don't communicate much with them but not because of their religious beliefs but because we have all just sort of drifted apart over time.

ajr715 Level 6 Oct 4, 2017
2

Tell them you are not going to donate any charity to their church fundraisers and they will quickly run from your doorstep to your neighbors when they realize they are wasting their time.

HeidiC Level 2 Oct 6, 2017
2

that you love to worship the devil and that you will do some incantations tonight for him or her...and if you can have a piece of their hair

2

Either walk away, or put on headphones and listen to something worthy of hearing. If you’re the type that has to engage, I would not suggest insulting them; instead use reasoning and logic with the type of questioning and mannerism that paul1967 suggests.

GoodMan Level 7 Oct 4, 2017
2

being rude and mocking works

2

laugh at them

Sarcasm Level 6 Oct 3, 2017
1

Oh, I'd LOVE to hear about Jesus - whats he up to now ....

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