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Badly explain your profession

constancinople 4 June 12
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34 comments

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9

I attend meetings. Believe me I'm the best meeting attendee. I know all the meetings. My meetings are tremendous. Meetings will Win again. Bigly.

8

I take random shit that's dying and try to make it look pretty. This is said to make people happy, and apparently helps men get laid.

@BigBoMclain lol will do

That's funny. I have no idea what your job would be (without reading your bio or other stuff), but I am definitely curious! 🙂

@Akfishlady yes!!!!

Ok that was to funny!

8

I point a box with a hole in it at stuff. I used to dig up old stuff and look at it.

Jnei Level 8 June 13, 2018
8

I explain to people that their computers aren’t broken, instead they are just idiots who don’t know how to do basic things. Like run an update, or restart their computers, or (and I wish I was kidding) that computers do not have cup holders... that is a cd tray.

Katrik Level 7 June 13, 2018

LOLOLOL!!!

7

I hassle demean and verbally abuse kids who cannot participate in the regular school system.
Among other things such as teaching people how not to participate in our consumerist society and I also encourage wild animals to reclaim the towns and suburbs..

6

I attire people in gaudy fabrics for the amusement of others on a nautical holiday.

@Akfishlady Close. Cruise ship costumes.

@HighSeasKat that's a job ?

6

I enable the homeless and drug addicts.

6

I shoot bikers.

4

I already did in my profile: I grow disease

4

I distribute government handouts to lazy people.

@Tecolote That was good. 🙂

4

I get high and know things.

4

I am a would be Gyneacologist ?

"would be" or simply "amateur"?

@Rugglesby
Either or ?

4

Barriers erect I upon backyard boundaries to inhibit pets from wandering. Thus neighbors can not espy with prying eyes and eyesores yonder are out of mind.

4

System Analyst: I do stuff, a bunch of stuff and I'm the only who cares about it except for the pretty, coloured charts - so shiny

3

I teach 13th through 16th grade.

3

Everyone has an opinion about my profession, even though 99% are not qualified. And it's in our collective interest to blow sunshine up their asses, so the only honest conversations are between others in the same profession. Oh, and many, even IN the profession, actually know nothing either because amateurism is rampant...because our consumers are ignorant.

@Tecolote HAHA! Good guess, but no.

Financial advisor?

3

I make people cry and the more tears, the bigger my tips!
Hint: I yap about hatching, matching and dispatching folks.
That does sound flip! Well, you did say badly explain!

@Akfishlady "Hatch, Match and Dispatch" are just rhyming terms for the various life events I help folks celebrate. As a Humanist Celebrant, I write and perform new baby celebrations (after they are "hatched" ) and weddings (after they are matched) and celebrations of life (where they are dispatched) by sprinkling loved ones ashes in the ocean or elsewhere. All very emotional events, where my job is to effectively evoke some tears of joy, in most cases, and tears of grief in others.

3

Medicine has so many sound alike words, and if I don't know the difference and make sure the right word is there, somebody could die. Then again, since they mostly killed my profession by offshoring the work to people who don't speak the same language, and/or trusting an idiot computer to do it (just like it does your texts), its a wonder anyone's still alive.

3

I'm retired. I don't work.

Hear, hear !!

2

I assist churches in acquiring as many tax free bass guitar as possible.

2

Growin & Haulin Greens 😀

Varn Level 8 June 13, 2018
1

I dictate to databases.

1

I type up stuff and make pretty pictures on the computer.

1

I take sticks, go boom!

1

I fondle chicken to check it conforms and snip it in places to make it presentable.

Tilia Level 7 June 13, 2018

@Texasrunner ? I am on a team preparing chicken fillets for wholesale.

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