I’m sorry you are struggling with this. He’s being an ass, and you owe him nothing. He is sexually harassing you and you should report him. Unfriend him on Facebook. He is being disrespectful to you and likely knows he makes you uncomfortable.

His marriage is his business. Admittedly, that's pretty tasteless if he is cheating, but they may have an open marriage - so, don't judge too harshly.

In the final analysis, it's about what you want. Since our culture agrees that men have to be the ones to express interest, he is doing what everyone agrees he should do. If you aren't interested, then tell him. Say simply "I don't want to confuse you here; I'm not interested in dating you. You're a good guy, but I don't want to date you." It'll suck and his ego will take a hit, but he is the one that brought all that into work. If he can't be professional after he gets shot down, then he shouldn't have brought that into work.

If he doesn't take it well and it becomes a problem at work, then go to HR. He has to go.

Own the situation and this should go away fairly quickly. Silence is compliance, so you'll need to speak up and express what you want. Often that is adequate. If it isn't, then go to your employer. If the employer is any good, then it'll get dealt with quickly.

Just explain if this doesn't stop that you will go to his wife with your complaints

No whether or not he has an 'open relationship' or just cheating on his partner/spouse NO man has a given right to accost ANY woman what-so-ever.
To my mind, he's just being a dirty filthy perv and needs to brought into line asap.

Takes courage fist, get him have a coffee break and tell him like it is, platonic is as far as it goes and what he is doing may have to be addressed as harrassment.. You like him as a person but am not interested in establishing a relationship of non platonic nature.

That's tough. You should be yourself, no more no less. And tell him straight out, you have other interests, sorry pal, but that's how it is.
If he keeps it up......shift supervisor needs talked to.
Good luck.

Meet it head on.. tactfully let him know that his behavior makes you uncomfortable..you have every right a work environment of harassment... he is seeing how far he can go with you...let him know if he cannot control his behavior then you will have inform Human Resources of the situation... it’s always best if you have witnesses, but that is not always the case, nonetheless, don’t let this grow and really get out of hand... you know being in the medical profession “ the best cure is prevention “ ... best wishes.....

Report him to hr. He is violating company policy. On a first offense (of this nature, anyway, I have fired first offenses that were more overtly sexual) they will usually council anonymously. Remind him of policy, explain that there "have been complaints" and put a record of it in his file.

If you are around him for any reason, keep an eye on your beverage! He appears to have no boundaries and may be targeting you because you do not speak up...the fact that You felt "embarrassed" by his mentioning your perfectly legit workout wear troubles me!
The correct, fair thing to do is tell him, Once, in short, pithy words, 2 simple declarative sentences max, that you do not desire this type of attention, and that if it continues you will go to HR. (Your posting here, BTW, should be a "proof", if HR asks, so good going!)
Do Not answer His questions, wheedling, etc. after saying your piece! Jjust walk away after delivering this message, as staying/listening will allow him to spin another web around you, and give him more excuses to harass you. And make no mistake, this IS workplace harassment!!!

I'm sorry to hear that you have to endure that?. This type of guy will not understand normal communication - you'll need to do something dramatic for them to get the hint. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS LETTING THEM DOWN SOFTLY. They're on the predator spectrum.

The next time something happens, please start to cry - you don't have to be loud or hysterical just visibly disturbed - then walk away without saying anything. When you return to your station, avoid him, try to stick with someone else. He will seek you out and ask what's wrong or what he did. He knows, but he'll ask. Use that as your ONE time explaination that the style of communication you've been experiencing makes you feel very UNSAFE and that you can only tolerate professional communication from him. If he starts to downplay his actions, mention that you've reviewed HR policies and you will seek HR AND law enforcement help the next time he does any flirtatious action. He'll try to downplay the situation maybe make you look silly, but hold to your guns. "You have no idea what I've been through! This is a place of work, so I expect to be provided a safe work environment or I will take action."

Unfortunately, this kind of guy is like a puppy dog. You can let him down softly with a head rub. You pet him even once and that'll get his tail wagging. From now on, he's permanently in the dog house. If you are the type to care about his feelings, think about the 'confusion' you could be putting him through, if you don't take quick and decisive actions (AKA playing games). Block him on Facebook immediately. Don't stare at him, don't comment on his jokes, don't compliment his work ethic - he has already demonstrated he's not good at determining what is too much, and he will reciprocate too far. Whatever delusion he has in his mind will fade, but know this - the second you slip up he'll be back in fantasy land. SHUT IT DOWN. Your eyes should exude blizzards.

You have to tell him he's making you uncomfortable and to back off. Directly.

I would do this.... Have a conversation with him in private. I would tell him that you are uncomfortable with his advances and don't really want to be the "bad guy" but will go to HR if he continues. If he tries to play it off as "one friend complimenting the other" then tell him you are uncomfortable with his compliments as you see it as more than that. SHUT HIM DOWN!

I'd also unfriend him (or whatever you call it) on FB. All he is going to do with that is fantasize anyway...

I would suggest that you be absolutely honest about your feelings and explain to him the situation just as you did on here. If he doesn't respect that, then he is not a good person...you can't blame him for trying, but you can blame him for persisting..

He sounds horribly manipulative and dishonest. The fact that he's as willing to hurt his wife by cheating speaks to his gross lack of character. I wouldn't want to even be friends with this creep. I pity the poor woman he tricked into marrying him. I'd give him exactly one warning to back off before reporting his behavior.

Let this guy know emphatically that you do NOT seek relationships beyond professional interactions with married men. Especially at work. Inform him that all communication between you moving forward will be work related and professional or you will escalate the matter to your HR department.

You don't need to overreact, and if you do he may well accuse you of misconstruing him being friendly. I think you know what you need to say - in a nice way tell him that there are professional boundaries you would like to stick to and some of his comments have caused you embarrassment. That should probably do it without too much awkwardness. If he ever says he would like to know you better than just as a work colleague, that's your chance to say "Great, how about introducing me to your wife and kids?".

let's keep this professional...........

There’s plenty of advice already posted. It sounds like you’ve already told him you’re not interested in anything more than a professional relationship. The next inappropriate contact must be reported to HR, although I understand that women’s complaints about harassment often are discounted and you have to be prepared for an inadequate response. . He’s putting you in an uncomfortable position. Protect yourself in anyway you must.Find allies at work. Keep his texts as evidence.

Back in the day I handled this first by saying "I don't date co-workers". Period.

It later bit me in the ass with single co-workers. lol
But in today's work environment it's not a bad way to present it.

If it happens even once more? I'd say go to a superior. Frankly it's harassment. That's why companies have seminars.

Inform him that what he is doing is legally classified as sexual harrassment, and there are policies in place concerning that behavior in the workplace. Futhermore, you respect his ability as a fellow nurse, but do not appreciate his "compliments", and if they don't cease you will be forced to lodge a harrassment complaint with HR.

My original comment was sent at 57 comments and counting... now it is 91. I don't know about this guy or how you will decide to manage going forward but boy, at least you should thank him for getting about a zillion points on this thread !!!

Tell him to stop and that you are friendly only in a work sort of way. Be firm but polite and then watch him like a hawk. Watch to see if he is going to lie on you or undermine you in any way. If he does, then you have to take this to a higher level and that is not always fun because it affects the work place situation. Some men take a hint. Others are total assholes.

Threaten to tell his wife publicly, if he doesn't stop, and if your employer doesn't
handle it to your satisfaction.
Print out all communications with him. Show him you have it (have copies in case he snatches what you show him--cover your ass).
Tell him if he doesn't leave you alone, and not interfere with the
work environment, you will give his wife everything.

Get a lawyer and prepare to sue him and your employer. You might need to.
Especially since his behavior is effecting your work environment.
Who knows? He may have done the same thing to some of your coworkers.

When people start shit with others (bullies), they don't expect their victims to fight back. I don't believe in simply fighting back. That usually doesn't put a stop to it.
You have to come back with scorched earth. Blow up their world. They don't expect that.

STOP being nice to assholes. Ruin THEIR lives. They don't care about what
they do to yours.

Just say whats on your mind strait forwardly. You have the impression that he is hitting on you even if it is not what h intends, that you do not want him in your space, not interested in sharing personal information or closeness and tell him to keep an appropriate topic as working associates.

You don't have to be willing to put up with his unwonted attentions just to work with him. Ask yourself which you would prefer: putting up with his advances for the year(s) to come; or feeling the residual tension if you tell him that you wouldn't go out with him even if he wasn't married. Sometimes a stiff distance is better than a touchy-feely closeness on the job.