My take on God/Jesus answering prayers.
Prayer 1: Dear God/Jesus, please help me find my keys.
Answer: Yes, I will help you. Finds keys in the fifteenth place she looked.
Response: Yay! I found my keys Thank you, God/Jesus!
Prayer 2: Dear God/Jesus, can you help me get a few more dollars? I already work two jobs, but I just need a little more this month so I can buy school clothes for the kids and pay my bills.
Answer: Maybe, I will have to think about it. I have thought about it; sorry, not today--try again tomorrow.
Prayer for next two weeks: Dear God/Jesus, can you help me get a few more dollars? I already work two jobs, but I just need a little more this month so I can buy school clothes for the kids and pay my bills.
Answer for two weeks: Maybe--still thinking about it. Keep begging, though--I like that.
Two weeks later receives an envelope under the door with some money in it--does not know it is from their neighbor who learned of their financial troubles and wanted to help out, anonymously.
Response: Thank you God/Jesus for providing me with this money.*
*Does not consider how many other people begging God/Jesus for some financial help do not find money slipped under their doors.
Prayer 3: Dear God/Jesus please heal my broken spine so I can walk again.
Answer: Sorry, that is a no.
Response: I don’t understand why you won’t heal me. You helped my neighbor find her keys, why won’t you help me walk again?
Answer: I said, no. But, trust me--I have a good reason.
After many failed prayers begging God/Jesus to change his mind:
Hmmm…maybe you won’t heal me because you don’t exist?
God/Jesus are you there?
What I always found interesting or comical was when people who would ask for a sign “to help them with some decision,” seemingly couldn’t see the sign staring them right in the face. I’m not a religious man obviously. I am observant and knowledgeable enough about faith to know a sign when I see it after hearing someone vocalize their prayer. Sometimes I just want to smack them on the head and ask if anybody’s home. “Nobody is as blind as he who will not see.”
Have you ever performed a QUANTIFICATION TEST on prayer to see HOW WELL prayer works? Try this.
Flip a coin 20 times noting the results on a sheet of paper. You should see that you got around half the flips heads and half tails, give or take one or two. This is your control group.
Next, do the same exercise but each time you flip the coin pray for heads (or tails). Note on the paper the results of the 20 flips. Your result should show around 10/10, give or take a few.
You might say that the power of prayer worked in around 10 of the flips! But compare the results of your prayer group with your control group. The prayer group did NO BETTER than random chance as shown in the control group.
There is your power of prayer.
But Gawd was there. He allowed your neighbor to hear that prayer where you needed money and he also knew in advance that you would put your keys in the fridge. Isn't he wonderful.
On the other hand, Charlie is going to have to get a leg amputated but there is some lizard who is able to grew another one if that happens to him. Poor Charlie.
Oh so true!!! I got another one. God let his son Jesus die after getting beat for a day or two. But God wouldn't help a 15yr old little girl that had had liver cancer. Instead of helping her or letting her die one month in it, he let her suffer for over a year. She was a devout Christian, and alot of days she would pray to god begging to die she was in sooo much pain she couldn't stand it. So God allowed his son to die after a few days of suffering, but allowed that little girl to suffer for year and a half. So if their is a God, Fuck him. If theirs no God actually makes alot more sense to me, that way nobody's to blame for the suffering in the world, not only for that girl.
Okay this is just smart humor, I appreciate it. It's thought provoking, too, and I'd like to share my thoughts on it.
Well this is the thing:
"God" is a word, but words, at a certain level, behave impressionistic because they are under-processed. In the laity, "God" is a word for the system that one lives in, and it's not discoordinated in all of its parts, and that's why some people thoughtfully argue that God is something beyond just a local belief to whatever official designated place they live in. "God" is a small word. The laity reacts to the word with prayer, which is part of a larger process.
So if you're wondering what all of this prayer and response is really about, it's because the larger process, which is watched, crunched, etc. that you're in is kept stable by the things keeping the sub-process consistent.
So if someone gave you money out of prayer, it's because of real feedback on clearly not force in this case, but information.
Everything you say, do, etc. is in a network but obviously not everything is going to register for so many possible reasons so some prayers are answered, and some prayers are not. The things you think are also in a network sometimes because some people have such fine nerves and developed brains that they can pick up and translate, sometimes accurately (depending on the germ character of the brain cells) the pulses of your thoughts, either directly or through the finer structures surrounding the nervous system.
Logic WILL tell anyone that anything they've lost WILL be found in the very LAST place they look for it.
It's kind of like the old story of a bloke who goes to church and asks God " If a million dollars to mortals is the same as a dollar to him and a minute to him is like a million years to mortals."
God then replies, " Yes my child that is correct."
The bloke then asks, " Well God could you perhaps loan me a dollar, I'm broke and my family are starving?'
God replies, " No problem my child, just give me a few minutes to think it over."
I am quite at odds with my family. I want to buy the house I live in, which is owned by my what parents. We have very different ideas about how much to credit the rent I've paid toward the price. At work, someone said, "You should pray about it!" I said I'd sooner pray to your necklace. When I was a believer, NO prayers were ever answered. You know what Einstein said about doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting a different result! I fancy myself as being NOT insane! Pray!!! Yeah right! To who? Nobody's out there!
If you think about it, asking, or praying to God is a a bit of blasphemy.
To one that prays, their ego, or wants or needs, supersedes Gods plan.
In other words. It's like saying, I know you have a master plan, but just for me, can you change that plan. I promise to be good. or what ever bargain.
If indeed God did in fact answer prayers, that means his "plan" is fallible.
"Answer for two weeks: Maybe--still thinking about it. Keep begging, though--I like that.
Two weeks later receives an envelope under the door with some money in it--does not know it is from their neighbor who learned of their financial troubles and wanted to help out, anonymously."
I have an old childhood friend, where pretty much that exact thing happened..
When i saw her post on fb "thank jesus" i wanted to scream lol