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My agnostic husband and deeply religious father started having a debate about whether or not God is logical. It ended up being a little bit like a yelling match. There is really no getting anywhere at that point. Basically, both are just trying to be right. :/

Biblebeltskeptic 6 Dec 7
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44 comments

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7

But only one of them can be right. I think each should continue to assert their side louder and more unyielding until the argument gets completely out of control and ends up in a bitter family split that will take years to heal.

Or

Hubby can just know he's right and let dad have his feel good fantasy.

5

My mother and I used to have these discussions a lot. It made her sad that I didn't believe in God, but she accepted it, and we were able to talk about it without getting into a shouting match.

5

That is why I stop the conversation, turn and walk away when it becomes a shouting match. I try to start a discourse by first asking if there is any chance that I could change your mind. If they say no then I say that there is no chance of your changing mine, so what would be the point of continuing.

4

I have come up with alternate subjects to prevent wholesale violence in family get-togethers: How about them (insert local team mascot here)? Wow your lawn sure looks good! Oh look, a squirrel! I've heard Brady is retiring..., then after all those, just as I'm leaving the house, I look back and say; "If there was a Jesus, he was probably black..."

4

I can still remember about 35 years ago when my dad was in my great-grandfather's kitchen, and dad said he believed in reincarnation. My great-grandfather was a loud man as it was, but started asking, "Where does it say in the BIBLE about reincarnation?" over and over again.

Both of them were prone to believing random crap at the drop of a hat. Someone at a local restaurant once told my great grandpa that they had a goat stomach surgically implanted, so now they can eat anything. He TOLD people this all the time, and he believed it.

4

You can't have intelligent conversations with stupidity or with brainwashed people.

4

neither your agnostic husband or religious father are being logical.

3

Like two bucks sparring.

3

A 'debate' is based on logic and reason not emotion. Maybe the two should take some courses in debating and then have a conversation. [classroom.synonym.com]

3

Bummer for you to have to sit through that . My mom knows that I'm Atheists. It doesn't seem to bother her at all. She has never cared to debate it. She needs to believe in something to comfort her regarding death. I don't. Live and let live. She doesn't impose her fairytale on my kids. So we're cool. Religion is the problem not the belief.

I agree. Belief is not the problem it is organised religions. I know people who believe, but are not religious.

3

That’s what Alpha males do. Dullest manifestations of a life form!

3

I never discuss my non belief unless it is with another individual with similar Ideology.

3

God is an incoherent, ill-defined concept ... but it's a fool's errand to expect a believer to see that. I mostly leave them to their slumber.

2

Sorry you're caught in that crossfire. There really is no point in arguing if no minds will be changed. Family harmony sometimes means more than being right.

Deb57 Level 8 Dec 10, 2019
2

Annoying isn't it

bobwjr Level 10 Dec 10, 2019
2

I was still going along with some Christian beliefs when my parents passed away in 2008, so had never confronted them head on with my disbelief in god.

I also had no idea I was nonbinary and demisexual, so was trying to live enough like a normal cis woman to pass, although I resented suppressing the male side of me.

At that time, I'd lost faith in the church but still thought of god equaling universal energy. Now I realize that we are ALL gods, uniting to make universal energy.
Also, that everyone is on a gender identity and gender trait sliding scale.

Still, I don't know if I could have come out to my mother in either case. I was fanatical about not hurting her feelings, and in taking care of her in her last years.

We'd been communicating mentally since we were in Haiti, and didn't have phones, and then when she was on the farm and needed me to come help her. Anyone I've connected with mentally usually stays in my head - including animals.

2

I've recently had an interesting twist in such a debate with family. When I thought out loud "well, how does it actually change anything for us?". Because, I am a good person, not because of carrot and stick religious threat or promise, but because its built into me. And if upon dying, I was to get sentenced to torture because I didn't properly flatter and praise a being? Well, it seems unlikely that the universe works that way - and if it did, a God which would behave that way would not be worthy of worship.

So, it kind of doesn't change anything. Our debates over it can really only stem from insecurity and ego. Their superstitious beliefs only become my business if it affects the laws that govern me, taxes I pay and etc (and of course it does some!).

2

It usually messy and a total waste of time to argue religion, the Bible, resurrection, evidence, etc., etc., etcetera! The argument is all about heaven and creation of such. So, where is heaven and, who or what created it? It is a waste of time talking with the mentally ill. Conjuring up this imaginary world is fine, but to believe that it actually exists is delusional. Religion is a scam and the great divider of mankind. It sets brother against brother for not sharing the same delusion of a supernatural realm called heaven or paradise. So if one wants to argue/discus these faiths the question should be, "Do you believe that heaven really exists?" And maybe, "Do humans have two lives or just one?" GROG

GROG Level 6 Dec 8, 2019
2

When you get your husband alone gently point out to him, that. What is not made by logic can not be disproved by logic. And that the burden of proof is on the believer, so there is no need to try and disprove belief.

2

Often people "agree to disagree" but for most religious people it doesn't work, eventually. Believers are invested in what others believe, but not the other way around. I've tried having Christian friends and believers of other faiths, but the day always comes when they invite you to church or try and convert you. Even if that day doesn't come, it's all the "I'll pray for you" and "God can help with that" in between that really bugs me. Also, when I take into account their politics - typically Republican, pro-life, pro gun, against gay people and in support of health workers who refuse to counsel on or provide birth control, etc, and where their money goes, (tithing to church or religious politicians) I lose respect for them.I really don't care what they believe, I care about what they do and how they treat other human beings.

2

It is like the ancient debate whether the earth is the center of the solar system.

Those that believed it was, knew they were right. Those that disagreed were burned at the stake.

2

Slartybartfast: "Well, I would rather be happy than right."

Arthur Dent: "And are you?"

Slartybartfast; "....No."

1

You can't change the mind of either unless one of them is having doubts and wants help deciding one way or the other. Same goes for politics. If only people were that passionate about facts and practicality.

1

There are so many flaws with God...where to begin? A god who cannot even look upon evil not only created it but allowed it in his home and further allowed a war to take place in his home! Then a God who commands his creation to forgive 70x7 fails at his own commandment as he cannot forgive his original creation's when he gave them a "choice" (even though one of those choices came with a major consequence) and they chose not to obey. Was it even a choice in the first place? Then the real kicker is when God defines clearly & exactly what love is in I Corinthians 13 and then acts 180 degrees opposite of this definition (remember god claims to be LOVE) when his very own scripture shows examples of him being Angry, Jealous, Vindictive, a Murderer, and changing his mind of all things. (what is that song...yesterday, today, forever.....anyhow) If these examples don't scream cognitive dissonance to any logical being...I really don't know what to say 🙂

How in the world can anyone in their right mind say that Yah-weh is unchanging? And long-suffering??

1

My most sincerest of sympathies go out to you and your husband but please try to take a little comfort from the following, " You can lead a horse to water, But you cannot make it drink and you can lead a Believer towards logic, But you cannot make one think."
Sometimes the best of intentions are oft to fall upon stony ground, but, none-the-less, it is always worth the effort to strive on, you never know when a crack may just begin to form allowing a tiny seed of Reasoning to fall though and begin to germinate.

Yes. Great illustration! However, Christians claim this as a parable about witnessing and the reception of the gospel falling on stony ground or hardened hearts as well :-/ I guess both Christians and non-Christians use this analogy in hopes that the other will see or consider their side.

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