The old see saw effect, I feel good when I put someone else down. Short sighted and self serving.

Mean people are very unhappy, but instead of dealing with it they take it out on others. It's like taking someone else down is the only way they can feel better about themselves. Sad.

I have two poeple in my life who have a mystery bug up their ass about me for some reaason yet to be explained or understood by anyone. I don't really care. I don't cry myself to sleep over nasty, hateful, horrible people.

Most people are assholes though

Some people get pleasure from causing displeasure. Others do the opposite.

Online, mean people are usually looking for a reaction.
But I'm even meaner.
I block them.

I just saw such a person commenting on a recent post. I don't understand why they need to be that way. ?

It takes work, self-knowledge, and will power, but it is up to the individual to overcome a natural proclivity to be this way. Not wanting to be thoughtless is the first step; fixing yourself takes time. I wish I could say that I've had 100% success, but I haven't.

In the U.S. It's become a troll society - few are interested in discussions - only in jumping to their comfortable extreme and badgering forth from there.

I feel happy and satisfied when I make someone's day, when I get someone to feel pleased, to laugh .... that is my kind of power or influence or whatever you want to call it. I can't imagine feeling joyful at causing pain. But that is the way some folks are. They love to hurt others.

Well, some people are just having bad days, and like you, they unintentionally make a fuss. Others have been hurting for a long time, and the only way they know to release the pain they feel is to make others upset. This won't help them in the long run, but they don't realize that. Occasionally, there is a person who actually means to upset people and doesn't care. Those people decide to be cruel because they don't actually feel much in terms of empathy and other people's feelings are just toys to them. They likely have a problem with their brain chemistry. In severe cases, people like that can be sociopaths.

That's the only way a lot of folks know how to roll. Wish it was different.

When I was attending community college, I had a teacher that was very wise and always engaged the students in a proactive manner. She had a saying that made a lot of sense: hurt people hurt people.

That must be a uk us thing

I also do not understant such a person.

If people believe they are in pain living their life, then they will give pain back. That's the way I see it. They come off as people that were never asked to be born but then will do nothing about it to end it. And they live like a hamster on a wheel and never get off. Just watch the movie Misery. ...

I’ll forgive everyone except Trump!

A lack of self esteem is often at the core, thus they over-compensate, pretending that ‘the best defence is a good offence.’ Having both volunteered and worked within schools, there’s a special kind of insight when parents can be observed with their kids … the apple rarely falls far..

Seems it can be a preemptive failure mode; ‘Everyone eventually considers me an asshole,’ ‘so why not drop all pretence and just be that a-hole’...? It also appears to be a way of backing others away from a fragile ..id.

There are several personality disorders that include or exhibit mean and uncaring behavior.. BPD is one I’m familiar with, which includes impulsive angry outbursts; in women, they really stand out; in men, it’s more often accepted as ‘typical male behavior.’ We’ve a very mean and uncaring malevolent narcissist in the White House at the moment … exhibiting further ‘cluster B’ behavioral traits. Some ask, ‘why’s he such an asshole?’ - it’s a condition of his mental illness…

And, if they’re a guy ..apparently some women are drawn to the ‘tuff, strong, all-knowing belligerent hardguy’… the guy’s pegged as her ‘defender,’ so must permanently assume this aggressive posture.. She feels safe, he feels needed - and we can’t get far enough fast enough

Not sure how many guesses that is … but those are mine

Neither do I.

@Josephine

It's literally in thier "wiring" or makeup if it's that consitent usually. Very complex subject and varying reasons.. If people are constantly that way it's likely neurology rather than chemistry though. Though not always 100% ..

So self absorbed they don't see or care about the feelings of others

I clicked in this topic thinking a was going to read a lot of trolling comments. I'm not sure what it says about me but I'm a little disappointed. All you nice people carry on. ??

I know a lot of assholes. They're all over CO Springs.

I guess that's a question for someone like that but probably we wouldn't like the answer.... ????

The ones who are deliberately thoughtless and insensitive are just plain jerks.
If they're intentionally trying to hurt someone's feelings, they are basically assholes.
However, there are plenty of times when people can be that way without meaning to.
It happens. I also think there are far too many people who are overly-sensitive,
and thin-skinned, who can't handle people who are a little more coarse, or rough
around the edges. A lot of people need to toughen up and be less sensitive.
Not everything is meant to offend people's delicate sensibilities.
And I'm probably going to catch hell for this comment.