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53 13

Well just wanted to talk to yall for a minute. The woman I've been going with for the last 1.5 years has decided that she wants to break up. The reason being she is a Baptist and goes to church, while I'm an atheist she thought she could get me back in church but I have no desire to go to church and I'm not searching for god .

bradholland10 5 Apr 23

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53 comments

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14

Bullets hurt worse. You dodged one.

11

What a waste at least she's gone. Bruh one thing I've learned in my life is there are no baptists that don't plan to try and convert you. Ever. My Missouri family pull this BS every few years. They give up...wait a while....then "god sent me a message that I will save you!!!!"

It was futile from the beginning bruh.

They're like Jehovahs Witnesses or mormons. They get holy points for every person they convert and 3,000 points gets them a cool plastic toy ring and 100,000,000 points gets them a wicked awesome personalized Heaven

@LadyAlyxandrea lmao I luv your humor

@LadyAlyxandrea here, 3000 points doesn't even get you to level 6 😉

@LadyAlyxandrea damn... just like chucky cheese.

9

Did she have an agenda when you first got together thinking she was going to try and convert you? Then that is not love. It's tough but you will be better off in the long run since you didn't have a lot of time investe in it. There are women out there that are not going to try and change you into something you are not or don't beleive in. Well at least you know where you stand now in her eyes. So many relationships are busted up over this bullshit. Its not easy.

9

Find a good non believer. You will be so much happier.

9

I have dated religious men and it has never worked out, they try to save your soul for God and that seems more important to them than the relationship itself. Never again will I date a religious man, not ever ever ever. Not worth the anguish as I will never be religious myself.

8

Sorry about that, but good riddance, she obviously doesn't respect your non belief

8

Her loss...

Varn Level 8 Apr 23, 2018
8

You may be better off in the long run. Trying to change someone to fit their idea of what is "right" is just plain arrogant and self centered. Either you love someone they way they are or you don't. That's not to say we can't all change and self improve--but that is up to the individual, not the partner. How about she stops going to church to fit in with your beliefs? I imagine that wouldn't go over too well--and her trying to change you shouldn't either. If she wants you to be something you are not, then she doesn't love you.

8

So, she was seeing you under false pretenses.
That's too bad. I'm sorry she misled you and played with your feelings.
How christian of her.
I know it might not feel like it right this second, but I'm going to tell you
that you are better off without this person in your life.
Hope you get to feeling better about things soon.

7

Sorry, guy. But you can't change anyone, they can only change themselves, & even then, you can't force yourself or another to 'believe'. This was bound to be a problem, unfortunately. It sounds trite & flippant to say so, but, really, this is probably for the best. Now you are free to find someone that matches you better. Best of luck!

7

You will eventually find a woman who shares your same world views.

7

I can't see this working...UNLESS, this person is sitting on the fence about her religion! If she is steeped in that religion, she will be tormented by your atheism. She may 'work,' on you to change and you may never go in that direction and it will tear you apart, trying to love someone and accommodate some Idealogy...your own and the person you love! Over time, this is bound to tear you all apart! You must choose, but oil and water want mix and wishing it so...will never work!

7

If it's a deal breaker for her she should've saved you the time. Sorry man.

7

I've dated Baptist s and they are relentless, brain washed, I think. I find not only the belief system incredible but also the attitude. I know I will not date one again.

7

I urge you to be true to yourself. If she wants to change you in this way, what else is on the agenda?

7

It's unfortunate but this is how women tend to think. Getting you in church makes both of you the same and her god will thank her too. Chances are she thought you were just "angry with god." Why? Maybe because their bible book teaches them that. The book also says that everybody believes in god, BTW. Either she thinks in her own mind that you "have had enough time" to make this decision so you can "both be equal" or her pastor or friends have been advising her about it. Evangelicals call it "being unequally yoked."

7

I'm sorry brother...

7

Break-ups are painful, no matter what the reason may be. I hope you find a happier relationship in the future.

Deb57 Level 8 Apr 23, 2018
7

Sorry for the hurt, but it is better to be true to yourself than to fake your way through life. Maybe you will find someone that likes you just the way you are here at agnostic.com. Best wishes.

I agree I think some people go to church just to look good in front of other people I'm not that person as a matter of fact last few times I heard a preacher preach I wanted to just go off on him and all of his little sheep

@bradholland10 I hear ya. Last time I was in a church was about 30 years ago. Such hateful, judgemental people. Would serve the right if there were a god. They would have some explaining to do!

6

When I was younger I thought I could change men too. I learned a hard lesson you can't . Anyway start over for the better.

6

Maybe she should have thought of that 1.5 years ago.

Kind of what I was thinking

6

Sorry to hear bro. Her loss. If that's the reason she gave you then she would of realised that from the start. Sounds like she wanted to see if you'd change for her. Good on you for staying true to yourself.

6

I spent 6 years in a marriage to learn that fundamental differences rarely form a solid foundation for a relationship. It hurts to give up or lose something enjoyable and familiar, but I have to believe that we are opening ourselves to the opportunity for greater fulfillment and realization of our true selves in the future.

Susu Level 2 Apr 24, 2018
6

she didn't understand at all then.

6

Been there done that myself years ago. It sucks, but I had to let her go. We were so not on the same page....im an atheist, she was a deep believer.....it wasn't working.

You'll be OK.

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