I wouldn’t be angry but for different reasons. There’s such an infinitely small chance they are right. I wouldn’t be mad because, despite the silliness of a baptism, they meant well. If a shaman came and sprinkled salt on his toes and ate a frog leg at his bedside while chanting it would be just as silly, but his intentions are good. I would thank them for their good intentions and smile to myself thinking how quaint.

I agree with Mighty Justice, since there is no God it was more for her own peace of mind than anything. It doesn't really change who he was or what he believed at the end of the day. He may have went along to pacify her.

I agree with Mighty Justice, since there is no God it was more for her own peace of mind than anything. It doesn't really change who he was or what he believed at the end of the day. He may have went along to pacify her.

I agree with Mighty Justice, since there is no God it was more for her own peace of mind than anything. It doesn't really change who he was or what he believed at the end of the day. He may have went along to pacify her.

I think I would just view it like any other bath or shower, but likely soapless. As long as it didnt hurt him in any way, it was by definition harmless, right? I can understand you being upset because it was disrespectful of his beliefs, but I think I would have an easier time letting it go if I framed it that way.

I think I would just view it like any other bath or shower, but likely soapless. As long as it didnt hurt him in any way, it was by definition harmless, right? I can understand you being upset because it was disrespectful of his beliefs, but I think I would have an easier time letting it go if I framed it that way.

I don't think that I would let what she did mess with your happiness. It is understandable what she did if she is one of the christians. Does not make it right. We have centuries of deep seated thoughts and ideas in our culture based upon christianity. I don't feel anger towards these people when I see or hear them say something or do something that contradicts logic and reason. It is a constant battle for us, but as they say down here in the South "it is what it is."
Just my opinion.

Hedging his bets no harm done.

They didn't save anything except (false) face. HE didn't embrace anything and they just put on a dog & pony show. Salvation requires personally embracing something; if he didn't believe then he went to his death with his (spiritual) integrity intact.

It's all fantasy bull shit and doesn't really change anything, but it is creepy as fuck.
If she is an otherwise good person, the "christian" thing to do might be to let her see the kids everyonceinawhile, if they want to, after she apologises for her transgressions and promises to never do it again, or face full astraciziation.

Neither. There's no point in being upset about it -it's happened. It probably gave her some comfort. Hopefully your dad didn't know much about it. And as far as you're concerned, I'm guessing you're not a believer, so what happened? A man said some strange words. I'm guessing their intentions were good if misguided.

It made no difference to him, in reality. Relax. It's not like he was actually damned--any more than he would have been without the silly ritual.

My father was conservative Christian his whole life and in his last weeks he began to doubt his faith, doubt his faithfulness to that faith, and became terrified that there wasn't an afterlife. My stepsister convinced him to relax and wait for it, but his decaying faith at the moment of truth was eye-opening. It's not like your father's wife did any harm, because she just wasted some effort on a person who most likely had no idea what she was doing. I wouldn't want anything to do with her now, but she was just being ridiculous and that's not worthy of being upset.

I think you have a right to be upset by it but I would caution you to consider her position as well. He is gone, no harm done to him. The rituals and ceremonies that any one of us does when someone dies can be a comfort as well. She had to live on without him. She did what she had to do to let him go with some degree of peace of mind so that she could get through the day, the week, the month and all that follows. Living in a mentally/emotionally tortured state eventually leaks out to those around her so be upset, but at least give a little consideration for her needs, too.

Awwww, my condolences for your Dad. And, I think this was a story on a show with Seth Andrews, "The Thinking Atheist."

She’s an asshole

I would be super pissed.

Upset yes, I am explicitly stating I do not want god even mentioned if someone chooses to memorialize me. But the good part is what your mom did means nothing, My mom just died a few months back and she was like me, atheist and did not care to learn what my brother the pastor or my brother the born again catholic. With Alzheimers disease Mom was lost and I wanted to donate her brain to research, My wonderful catholic brother hired a priest , would not donate her brain due to the resurrection mom was about to receive. I was pissed off and mostly hurt at the lack of sense or common good.

I was in the hospital. My parents priest showed up to give me a blessing while I had a toothbrush in my mouth (in bed). Apparently the LOOK I gave him convinced him not to come back and visit again. It's wrong to force your beliefs on someone when they can't defend themselves. But don't worry - a baptism doesn't "make you religious".

A Buddhist monk and novice were walking by a river when they came upon a young woman in distress. "Please help me" she asked. "My mother is sick and needs a doctor but I cannot get across this river to fetch him". The monk put the lady on his back and fords the river. He returns to the novice and they continue on their journey. After a few hours have passed, the novice talks to the monk and says "I am troubled". "What is troubling you?" the monk asks. "Well we are forbidden all contact with women and yet you carried that young lady across the river". "Yes I did" said the monk "but I put her down. You have been carrying her for the past 3 hours".

Whatever differences you have with your stepmom, you both do have one thing in common. You both loved your dad and presumably he loved her, despite of their different beliefs.

We only get one innings and when your out, your out. The anger that you feel is very justified but it only hurts you. If you could bring yourself to forgive her then it might go some way to show that Christians do not have a monopoly on forgiveness. It may also go some way to help you deal with your loss. I ask you to try, for you and your dads sake if not hers.

OH my gosh! I would be livid You are right to be furious, but don't let the anger consume you. It only hurts you, not the transgressor. Peace.

I was going to quote Voltaire's last words to the priest but there is doubt as to their authenticity. Instead I'll leave the following link to some interesting deathbed quotes real and imagined.
[nairaland.com]

It's pretty amazing how people are when death are involved. Did it hurt your father, no. But I would be very upset if someone did that to me towards the end. My Grandmother died Christmas Eve Morning. We still had our family Christmas and my mom let my Aunt say grace and it was horrible. This is the same Aunt who was upset with me when I decided to tell my family I was an atheist.

A lot of religious people are selfish in this manner. They cannot live and let live. Think about it as a mass insanity. How can they justify a sky fairy in their own minds if someone rational is before them? She will say she saved him and her fellow believers will hero worship... ugh

I really REALLY hope no one messes with me like that. Sorry

You have the right to be angry ...but did you guys, you and your dad, talked about that before he got too sick? Or did you ask her if she had his okay?