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How chivalrous are you?

Guys, have you been chivalrous to your wife also or just the dates?
Does women really like chivalry?
Has it got any relevance in a modern society?

Srijith 7 Jan 25

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22 comments

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12

I just consider it being courteous, irrespective of the gender of the other person. If I'm first to the door, I hold it open for those behind me.

Thank you for your comment

same

6

Collins dictionary: A chivalrous man is polite, kind, and unselfish, especially towards women.

That's me towards everyone.

Thank you for sharing the comment

5

I think of My Fair Lady

Pickering to Higgins: "Higgins, are you a man of character where women are concerned?"
Higgins: "Pickering, have you ever met a man of character where women are concerned?"
Pickering: "Very frequently."
Higgins: "Well, I haven't."

Of course, we must agree with Pickering. But I can't help but think Higgins has a point. Men, and the influence women have on them.

4

There is a difference between 'traditional chivalry' when a man's behaviour towards a woman is based on the traditional way a MAN (specifically) is supposed to behave towards a WOMAN (specifically) and 'good manners' which is the way a decent person (regardless of gender) should behave towards another person (also regardless of gender).

If a man's behaviour towards a woman is dictated by GENDER then it is an outdated concept.

I disagree, take for example going dutch. Women look great, especially so if you take them for dinner. Do you imagine that look for comes free? No, they probably got their hair done and no end beauty regimes to come that night looking at their best. Not to mention their clothes. Whilst us guys...? Let`s put it politely are not exactly Beau Brummel. We shower, trim, put on our cleanest duds and sally forth. With that in mind it only fair seems to me that a man should at least sincerely offer to pay for the meal, with no stings attached.

And yet that re-enforces the gender stereotypes of the woman being 'decorative and paid for' and the man being 'the buyer of female attractiveness' - so no, 273kelvin, women should not expect to be paid for, and men should not be expected to pay.

Both chose to eat - both share the cost. Just as you would expect for two men or two women.

4

To quote a friend, I'm "so old fashioned I'm almost backwards" I've always done my best to be chivalrous I feel its a sign of respect. I completely understand why it appears to be dying out, a lot of women don't appreciate it. A comedian I saw once said "there's no gentlemen left because their are no ladies anymore". I don't agree, there are still some but certainly not many.

Dav87 Level 6 Jan 26, 2018

I am quite fond of gentlemen, but it is true, they are indeed a dying breed. I chalk it up to so many overly sensitive womens-lib types that essentially morphed into man haters.

I appreciate it when men open doors for me or stand to offer me their seat, even though i don't take it usually, it is still the thought that counts.

There are still women in the world that appreciate these traits in men. I certainly do. And you are a rather old school gent yourself, I would have to agree. 🙂

4

Well according to the retired nuns up the road, I am the answer to every young maidens dreams. And yes, I am quite chivalrous. Many women do not like it, but I am as strong as the proverbial ox, I can't stand by and watch a lady try and get heavy gear in and out of a car when it is no effort at all for me.

Thank you for the reply

3

Most women like chivalry. It is simply being polite and caring.

3

I will fall hard and fast for a true gentleman.

3

ok so i am very chivalrous to women i general despite being a gay male. My close relationship with my mom compels me to respect women. I open or hold doors, and its always "ladies first" before myself

3

I am chivalrous. What arms do you choose for our fight? 😀

tadpoles at 20 paces.

Lol

3

Hi Srijith,I try to be curtious but may not be chivalrous.

Thank you for the reply

3

I Love chivalry. It makes me sad how much this behaviour has gone down over the decades. I Still enjoy and Old School man who opens doors for me, is mannered around me... all in all, a basic gentleman. I adore gentlemen. We need MORE!

Although, I haven't accepted any dates since 2016, I am still a fan of gentlemanly behaviour. Maybe I don't date because I haven't found enough gentlemen? lol

Sadoi Level 7 Jan 26, 2018

No gentleman for a lady, that's sad.

@Srijith tis a pity... many of us ladies... without gents... tsk tsk. Men these days! hee hee 😉

@ScienceBiker firstly, i am sorry to read of your mothers passing. Secondly, she raised you right my friend! 😉

1

Altruistic as a Jovian day is long.

"The true measure of a Hero is when he gives his life
with the knowledge those he saves will Never Know" -Outer Limits

1

An interesting question. I think it is directly proportional to the decline of a relationship. By which at the start we all open car doors (and she does not fart). By the end she is thankful if you take car out of gear.
Case in point, my last really long term one. At the start I would readily roll her a smoke when we drank (which was quite often). After a while this grew increasingly more irksome, especially as the evening wore on and the requests would turn into more frequent demands. Not only had I to make them but also light them. As she talked she would forget about said smoke and I would have to relight it too . This meant drop what your doing/talking about etc. and do it. Eventually I went on strike and would only provide this service when she was totally incapable.
PS. I smoke a pipe.

Thanks for sharing the experience

1
He should not have grabbed her but the idea is funny. I’m sick of entitlement
1

Not at all, but I play a chivalrous guy online sometimes, who happens to be thirty pounds lighter and full of muscles.

1

It always has its part in society. As a man brought up with a military Mom then military myself. It’s ingrained in me. But also is the truth of it is 2018. We are equal. I will always hold true to my chivalrous idealism as long as you take a step forward as an adult and my equal and do what you need to do.
You don’t need me to protect you and take of you. So I will do my best 1000 fold.

1

I am, and my wife appreciates it. If she didn't, I would change to accommodate. That too is chivalrous.

1

I tend to be this way. I have heard oh he's a nice guy . Then they run back to the guy that is shitty to them.

Yeah, they need to reminded of the words of Sheryl Sandberg.
[cnbc.com]

1

I am a Romantic and I am well set on my standards... The day I date a woman not worth a poem from me... I had lowered my standards and that ain't gonna happen. A dame in distress will catch my attention, no strings attached.

1

Most cis women, heavy in femme traits, appreciate men looking out for them. The ones who become angry could be women with a high percentage of male traits (as I have) which makes them feel insulted, as you would be if another male tried to open the door for you. I have to force myself to let men do things for me.

Thanks for your viewpoint

1

I've met a Few men that truly were chivalrous..and respected my person..unfortunately they're few and far between.

Thank you for the comment

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