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Would you allow your child to be given a christian baptism because it is important to your partner's family?

Even if you know that there is no such thing as original sin and your partner agrees that a baptism is just a tradition but it's important to their family as it is a tradition they feel is necessary. Would you allow it? Would you go to the event? Would you be open with your growing child dispel the nonsense that the child would hear when they are around their christian grandparents? Anyone deal with a partner that's reasonable and doesn't practice the religion of their birth but their family does?

By 4EvanSake6
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39 comments

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1

Yeah. it won't hurt anything.

14

NO. It's bad enough I have to watch other people raising their kids with absurd delusions.
I wouldn't allow anyone influencing my child with that bullshit. I don't care who they were.
I'm really tired of believers expecting their beliefs to be respected, when they refuse to
extend the same courtesy to anyone else.
Nope. No more.
Everyone is born an atheist. Religion has to be taught.

KKGator Level 9 Mar 14, 2018

ditto

11

Sure. Why not? It's just a stupid, meaningless ceremony, and you'd probably score a free meal out of it.

webbew1 Level 7 Mar 14, 2018

This guy gets it. What difference does it make? None.

7

Did it with my kids because I'd agreed to raise them Catholic. They turned into Atheists anyway.

If it was today, I'd tell people they have no right to tell me how to raise my kids and I would never baptise them to please others. As meaningless as it really is - it starts to enable those other family members. Next, they'll want the kid to take First Communion, and so on.

MrLizard Level 8 Mar 14, 2018
6

No and I was upset when my ex husband (a born again Christian now) encouraged our special needs daughter to get baptized as an adult behind my back.

5

The accommodation for societal religiosity at the expense, of the nonreligious mind—Christianity in particular, has long worn out its welcome. Hell. No!

Sapio_Ink Level 6 Mar 14, 2018
5

Agree to this and the next thing they will want to start the brainwashing.

5

My children are not baptised, strangely my daughter thought she could get married in a church, when she realised she would need to get baptised first she changed to a hotel.

jacpod Level 8 Mar 14, 2018

Maybe a Mormon church would have allowed it because they only get married in their temples? (Former Mormon here).
Unitarian Universalist allow anyone to be married in their churches is my understanding.

I think the hotel is better though. Hope it was wonderful

@Myah yes it was wonderful she worked at B sky B and had loads of friends there for a weekend it was during the foot and mouth crisis here, and it snowed so we had nice walks etc and played lots of silly games.

4

No. We are all born atheists, we should stay that way.

Rugglesby Level 8 Mar 14, 2018
4

My husband was a practicing Catholic and when my son was born I refused to christen him with the argument that he could make his own choice as an adult. His family had no choice in the matter.

Betty Level 7 Mar 14, 2018
4

Thank you for responses. Very interesting and very helpful!

4EvanSake Level 6 Mar 14, 2018
3

I wouldn't allow it to happen. As close as extended family can be it's ultimately the parent's responsibility to raise their kids. I don't think they have a right to force their religion on your kids.

3

My ex husband's family was devout Irish Catholic in Boston. Me, agnostic. Refused any baptism and my in-laws took my son and christened him behind my back. I only found out on Facebook 20 years later. Had a decent laugh and couldn't care less. Fuck them.

3

For sure, that's an easy win.
My son already knows that not all religions can be true, so why think any of them are.

3

I would allow it and go to the event even if I did not agree with it. If it's the other parent to said child, then they have every right to expose that child to their traditions and beliefs just as much as you have those rights.

3

It is of no consequence to me or my kids that I did indeed allow that to happen. As a person that respects my elders, even their ridiculous make believe ideals as well, it didn't make any difference and I believe never will.
Now if it went against my belief system, as in the idea that it would be an affront to my religion or lack thereof, then no I wouldn't have.

2

No, only if the kid wanted it when they were older. They would have to make that choice themselves.

Myah Level 6 Mar 15, 2018
2

It wouldn't bother me. I would tell everyone it's meaningless, but I'd allow it in order to keep the peace. My kids were baptized, and they heard beliefs from me, as well as my wife, and from both of our extended families. I was the lone atheist in the bunch.

My kids are grown now, and I'm proud to say, they're both atheists.

MollyBell Level 7 Mar 15, 2018
2

No, no, no!

ashley44 Level 7 Mar 14, 2018
2
2

One thing leads to another. Before you know it, they will want your kids in Sunday school and then preaching the word of God on street corners lol. If they're my kids, I have final say.

I totally get wanting to teach your children what you believe to be the truth but I find your methodology to be flawed. In the same way that so many people hate religion from it being shoved down their throats, if you do not at least show them what you find to be senseless with the ideas, they could feel as though they were left with only one choice and that could easily create the feeling of being controlled and cause contempt. We all know you have plenty to work with proving them wrong. I don't know you and could be off base. It just comes off that they would feel as though if they believed then they would be disappointing you. Show them why it doesn't make sense. The hypocrisy. But be unbiased at that point. Don't hide your beliefs. Just unbiased. They will ultimately be grateful that they never felt pressured to believe anything besides what they find to be the ultimate answer. I despise religion but it does have uses. This world is hard and if believing in the spaghetti monster gives them strength, I wouldn't deny my own kids that help. Jut an opinion. I don't mean to be too presumptuous or try to tell you how to parent.

@DerekFuiten What methodology? When I said I have final say, I meant that in terms of telling my significant others parents. Teaching my kids, if I ever have any, would be me guiding them and them making their final decision for the most part. Some things you have to make the decision for them because they really don't know any better, but as far as philosophical issues etc., yeah, that's all on them. I'm not a tyrant and that's not how I meant it. I'm not offended at all. I just didn't mean it in the way I think you took it.

1

No.

El-loco Level 7 Mar 19, 2018
1

I have 3 children none are baptized, both the women I had children with understood from the start brainwashing would not occur until they were old enough too consent, the older two are in their 30's and still atheist, the youngest is in his early 20's and atheist and his mother considered herself to be a devout christian.

slinkie59 Level 5 Mar 18, 2018
1

Believe it or not, I let my own son be baptized. I was young and didn't know any better and let family pressure influence me. Now I woultn't let him go near a church, much less let a delusional priest pour water on him while muttering undecipherable ejacultations.

Aristopus Level 7 Mar 18, 2018
1

I personally wouldn't have bothered. My ex wanted to do it, presumably under pressure from her family (and probably a bit from my mother.) I went along with it. It's a harmless ritual and was a good excuse for a family get-together. Which in turn was a chance for my mother to get some smug satisfaction about how ill my father was (they'd divorced over 20 years previously.)

He stopped believing in Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy. I don't think he believes in God or Jesus, but it's been a while since we've discussed it, and I leave it for him to raise the subject. It's for him to figure out. No pressure from me in any particular direction.

1

No. Even if my wife wanted I would object. I Believe that the individual should have the right to make that decision when he is mature enough to deside for himself. I have two sons who were raised in a non relgious environment. I let them decide for them selfs what to believe. One is a athiest and the other the attends church with his wife. I myself and my wife are athiets.

MrLee Level 5 Mar 17, 2018
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