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Why Men Send Dick Pics

What are your thoughts?

[psychologytoday.com]

VictoriaNotes 9 Mar 19

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97 comments

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34

I've never been that eager to show off my shortcomings. lol

You're so adorable sometimes. 😀

hahaha

7

They must be really hard up with nothing worth while to do.( Forget the pun)

I found the part about gay men interesting. They apparently don't have any issues with this.

@VictoriaNotes I wondered about that as well. Perhaps because once-upon-a-time-but-still-now, clandestine sex was the only available relationship between many gay men, thus making it a logical way to garner interest (or intent)? I know some gay men who would be disdainful of that being the method of first contact for anything other than sex.

@Benthoven -- what are your thoughts? (See comments from me and Lauren)

Well, I can't speak for all gay men, but the dick pick is a little different with us. We tend to be connoisseurs when it comes to a good pic: keenly aware of area, mass, structure, construction, and manufacture, and landscaping. But that being said, men in general, and gay men in particular, have kind of an obsessive fascination with that little tagger. It’s a toy we’ve grown up with, playing with since we first discovered it was there. And once we discovered how much fun we could have with it, we lost all reason when it comes to appropriately wielding it.

While I said as a joke that men don’t understand how women don’t find their dicks fascinating, I think it’s actually true. I remember in high school, the straight guys were always talking about their “giftedness,” showing it off, playing with each other. To them it wasn’t gay. To me... well now you know why I was always trying to avoid the locker rooms. I don’t know if it was societal, or if it’s a “guy thing,” but there is a lot of peacocking among other men.

So straight and gay, there’s a strong fascination with this little gadget... Your average dick-pick-sending guy loves HIS dick (and thinks you will too), whereas an average gay man prefers a smorgasbord and enjoys window shopping.

But gay man and women do share one thing in common. The pick should be “solicited.” I don’t know many gay men who are comfortable with perfect strangers sending dick picks unsolicited... unless they’re on one of the many gay hookup sights, like Grindr... in that case, it’s a given you’re going get some pictures. BUT... that doesn’t mean that they’re not going to go out and find some Website that offers them the lollypop buffet... so-to-speak.

I realize this is a bit of a ramble, sorry about that. As a percentile, I think more gay men are going to be “okay” with a dick pic, but even in that community, there’s a framework for how it works best. Our framework is more loosely structured, but it’s there nonetheless.

@Benthoven Not a ramble at all. Thank you so much for taking the time to explain at length. This was insightful.

Thanks, @Benthoven! That's interesting in contrast to straight dick pic senders ... although the fascination factor is apparently universal. 😉

4

My "guess" is the same reason people flash: there is a certain thrill in knowing that someone else is looking at your privates... sort of like they are "touching" it with your eyes... don't know really.

3

This is unfathionable to me. I first discovered of this on this site and some friends confirmed it. I must be really wierd andniave to think it is absolutely disgusting not to mention a total lack of self-esteem.

I think this is another area we can never get as most men would love a picture of a woman's Genitalia.

As the article mentioned, some guys apparently get off (literally) on the shock factor.

@Akfishlady It's happened but I don't think it's near as common as on other dating-type sites.

@VictoriaNotes One would think that a valid site would screen this sort of crap! On my posting of feminism this is the kind of stuff women are exposed to and some men just scratch their heads and wonder what this "feminism" thing is all about, clueless!

9

Intellectually lacking, physically packing

Hutch Level 7 Mar 19, 2018

Always the former. Not necessarily always the latter. Usually always a disappointment.

5

I canniot comprehend why men would snend such picrtures. he reasons that they do just ring hollow and/or sick to me.

9

It is a stupid concept, the guys that do that kind of thing are on such an immature plane of age. They somehow get it in there heads most likely from TV and such that visual cues like that might gain a woman's attention. All of us romantically level headed men know flowers and talking are what most women that are normal romantically are looking for.

14

Maybe the title of this post should be "Why Men Send Unsolicited Dick Pics?" That is inexcusable. Men who do this are cowards hiding behind the relative anonymity of the Internet. Consentually, I have no problem with sending nudes back and forth, but would never do so without permission.

@Akfishlady My girlfriend an I were about 13 when we encountered a flasher walking down the street one evening. I went straight to the point and laugh response, she joined in and he ran. LOL

8

I think it's one of those freaky nature things. Men are turned on visually; see woman=turn on. Ignorant guy, Hmm what will turn her on? Sees me, nothing. Try more obvious!

The reason is ignorance. Maybe it's best they don't mate.🙂

1

So what we're saying is it's only men that send pics of their 'private parts'? Seriously, get a life people!!! I have received way more pussy/tit pics than I have ever sent dick pics. Just saying........

Oh and let me just qualify that slightly. I have sent dick pics but only after I've received something similar from a woman. Honestly, some of the sanctimonious shit I've read on here from men makes me think that there are some christians interloping on this site.

Just curious, did you read the article? I don't think people are talking about solicited or consensual pictures of each other.

1

I think a better question might be why do you folks think penises are either shameful, offensive or disgusting?

You folks may say you reject the churches teachings but apparently not all of the churches teachings were bad.

Sister Mary Catherine taught you well.

Our society does not show them all the time. We only encounter them when we are being intimidate with a man, which should always imply consent. This has nothing to do with religious beliefs, but social standards that we have come to expect. Unexpectedly and suddenly seeing them when no such intimacy exists tells us that the person so exposed is perceiving us sexually, when we are typically at a point where we are trying to establish a personal connection instead. It’s offensive because it says that who we are is less important to the person exposing himself than the fact that he sees us as an object of reception to his sexuality. The penis itself isn’t shameful, but exposing it this way should be.

12

Some women enjoy seeing dick pics and even ask to see it. One should not assume that is the case with every woman. Just wait until you are asked.

"Just wait until you are asked."

Agreed.

Exactly: wait until asked, or at least until the relationship has proceeded enough that one can make an educated guess on how it will be taken. No judgment being made on the action itself, just on the timing.

That's the key I think. Unsolicited dick picks are just idiotic. If they ask for one and you want to send it then I don't see the issue there...

I agree, wait until asked

@VictoriaNotes Oh ask, please ask, just ask... please? jajaja.... no seriously ask.
I hope you’re smiling.

@Tomas You nut. jajaja

Honestly, I think the only way I would ask for a pic would be to make sure it's not the size of a toothpick. 😛 I highly doubt I would ever ask, though.

3

Ithink alot of them do it cause it gets the point across quickly. they offer the pic as an invitation and hope to get someone interested. saves on time of talkin and all that but most don't realize that the talkin and gettin to know her is a much better approach if u want to get to the sex stage.

jorj Level 8 Mar 19, 2018

Yeah, that was one reason mentioned in the article.

@VictoriaNotes prob should have read the article then....im lazy on things like that sometime

7

I guess I've been lucky-no longer active on dating sites I have never received a dick pic.

Want to see mine???? (snicker)

I've never received one, either! Ha ha

"Stay off of Craigslist. They are ubiquitous there", she said gagging.

I recently went on a kinky dating site and immediately remembered why I stopped going there. It was very rare NOT to see a dick pic as their profile pic.

The dating sites w/no dick pics-Zoosk, Our Time, Match and Facebook's site whose name I forgot.

@kiramea, how booooring!

26

Some men think it's a "woman-lure", not unlike the worm on a fishing line. Hehehe. Anyhoo, I know this because my ex man, actually did this with me. OK, so it worked, but, in my defence, I was single, lonesome, in my 40s, and quite hormonal! We talked about it later and I learned that he thought his penis quite exemplary. I'm sorry that I ever dated him. (I feel embarrassed and stupid having ever been with him). I'll go sit in the corner now and just listen. :/

LOL -- get out of the corner. I appreciate your honesty. But, I have to ask --- did he send you a dick pic from the get-go?

@VictoriaNotes No. Not right away. We were yahoo contacts for about four years before he changed his profile pic to his penis. He changed options so that i was only one to see since he had family members as contacts too. We eventually lived together (NOT because of his penis!), so that's how I know. :/

Brave lady... with a great sense of humor... hope you’ve recovered.
... on the qt, could I have your email ? jajaja

Lol

19

I suspect that they don't understand how a woman can't be as fascinated with their dick as they are.

3

They think women are impressed by a big, firm, erection. I think they are mistaken.

As a woman, I have to say, I am impressed by a big, firm erection. Just not in the form of a picture. 🙂

@marga You are right..... of course a big hard dick is needed for sex. I was thinking about a photo of a big dick.

@nicknotes I know, just being silly, lol

3

I wonder if the appeal is similar to that of being forced to watch a man masturbate (such as Louis C K or Harvey Weinstein)? Perhaps they're not using it as a method of starting a relationship, but as a way to get release via sexual subjugation?

The article did touch on that somewhat. From what I gather from the article, the reasons seem to be multifaceted.

@VictoriaNotes Ha! TOUCHED ON THAT!

10

Because some of them are dicks 😉

Nomad Level 6 Mar 19, 2018

*snorts*

3

Most excellent article. I'm just going to share a part of it here...

Ultimately, the answer here lies in greater dialogue with men and women, over what they actually want in sexual communications. This might reach some of these men, those who are genuinely not understanding some sexual differences. But, this requires for women to have the safety to be honest about their sexual interests. For instance, could women ever say, "Look, I probably WOULD like to see your penis pic, but I'd like to be able to ASK for it..."? The shaming and suppression of female sexuality is part of the issue here, as men don't feel they understand what women actually want sexually, and women don't feel they can express it safely.

But I encourage you to read the whole article!
Also, don't be a dic.

7

Thinking of some of the recent items in the news * lean towards ego and an overinflated sense of entitlement, "I can do this because I'm important!" Or is it impotent? I get them confused.

BillF Level 7 Mar 19, 2018
0

Well Ihave never done a dick pick but think about it like this. If a guy sends a dick pick too one girl that odds of her msging back the she is DTF are low but you send it too 10 Girls they are higher at the end of the day he just wants too Smash.

Girls? Now that's sicko creepy.

1

I have gotten a few vagina shots back when i was confused and still dating women.
to answer your question, i think that for us guys sex is mechanical and it basically comes down to the penis and the act. Some guys feel that is all they have to offer a potential mate.Keep in mind that we are far more emotionally detached compared to women.

5

I prefer to keep my dick off of the internet lol!

2

Of course you're taling about unsolicited pics.
Then again, it is our favorite part and we just want to show it off.
Have you ever seen a woman right after she's gotten a boob-job?

Not entirely a fair comparison, given how often women have had men yell, “Show us yer tits!” Showing them off is typically a little less unsolicited. (Disclosure: I have never exposed mine anywhere except a bedroom)
?

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