Rudolph The Red Nosed Reign Deer.
It begins with a bunch of reign deer bullying Rudolph. And ends with them professing there <strong>love</strong> for him when he secures a prestigious position. I call BS. They didn't <strong>love</strong> him but were just sucking up. And Santa fails to intervene, but what do you expect from a POS that gives all the rich kids the best presents. What kind of a message is this to send to kids? That they can only be loved if they get an ego inflating job? That false friends are good? What the Hell are we doing? Your turn now.
I could say "Grandma got run over by a Reindeer" but that would be too easy.
All of them suck lol
Any Xmas song sung by Bing Crosby
O Holy Night. I don't like the tune. It's exasperating.
Then you haven't heard this version (Patti Smith at the Vatican - and she even dressed up for it!).
I wrote an adult Santa Claus song, as payback.
You better watch out
You better get saved
You better, before it is too late
Jesus Christ is coming to town
He has a big book
Unless you forgot
It tells who is saved, and who is not
Jesus Christ is coming to town.
He knows when you are sleeping
He knows when your awake
He knows if you are left or right
Save your soul, don't masterbate
You better repent
For hell is no hot night club
Jesus Christ is coming to judge.
He knows when you are lying
He knows when your a cheat
He knows when you are gay or not
So stop! Before the heat
The trumpets will be blowing
Then we will all be knowing
We will all be finally going
For Jesus Christ is coming to town!!!
We are all welcome to our illusions.
Remember the 11th commandment, keep it to thou self.
Santa Claus is coming to Town
Scared the hell out of me, as a child.
With Bruce you forget about the words for voice sex.
I thought with Santa Claus super powers he might turn me into a peace of coal.
Oh ..shit. I avoid them like the plague. So much so, I refuse to consider the question ...I'll read the comments, though..
Agreed. That's a pretty bad message. Especially for reindeer. But I think honorable mention should go to "I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day." Musically it's pretty. Lyrically, it's depressing as shit. It paints a dismal picture of mankind's cruelty to one another. Then it ends by saying, "cheer up, God's alive, therefore "right" shall prevail. No evidence, of course. Just have faith. (Festive! Right?) There are a ton of Jesus-y Christmas songs, of course. But that one has always been particularly grating to me.
Carol of the bells. This carol alone proves the absence of god, nevermind the truly awful covers by third rate boy bands. Ugh!
Absolutely!! We had some old Christmas records that were played every Christmas. I always wanted to just push the needle across that awful song!
I used to hear one on the student station at nc state, and the main chorus line was "have a merry christmas or i will kill you!!" makes me laugh to this day.
You have attracted an expert. Working in a grocery store in my retirement to keep busy I am inundated with xmas music all day. Jimmy Durante's version of "Frosty the Snowman" and "Holly Jolly Christmas" with Burl Ives. All xmas songs are annoying but hearing about 30 on a continuous loop for 30 days straight, these two are my most dreaded. I would rather hear kittens crushed under the wheels of a big rig, and I really LIKE kittens.
There are a few I can't stand (Carol of the Bells being the worst). I think it's kind of funny that a few of the most popular were written by Jewish composers:
Xmas songs, Jewish writers
“Do You Hear What I Hear”
“The Christmas Song”
“Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer”
“Holly Jolly Christmas”
“Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree”
“It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year”
“Let it Snow! Let it Snow! Let it Snow!”
That list is taken from this article from the Toronto Sun:
Any song that goes on about angels, god, the lord, the baby jesus, the mighty king, the wise men, mary and joseph, any thing religious. automatic turn off.
Holly Jolly Christmas.
Since I come from a Different Culture. In Puerto Rico the Jibaro Music is only Played during the x-mas season. Jibaro will be like the american equivalent of hillbilly country. But in Puerto Rico the lyrics often enough has nothing to do with x-mas... a lot of "double sense" and "sexual connotations" masquerade for the season. Is important because we have the custom of doing "asalto", we start the season after thanksgiving and continue until 8 days after 3 kings day on January 6th. Those 8 extra days are called "Octavitas". The deal is we go after everybody goes to sleep and round up a posse., guitars, congas, all kinds of instruments and wake up houses. Sometimes we inform ahead of time the target house so food and alcohol is available, we are there for 30 mins to an hour and we take off for another house... all the way until the last house around 4:30, 5:00 AM, they need to cook us Breakfast... Good Vegetables, Heavy Duty Gumbo. Drinking. Is a Moving Party. Lots of embarrassing moments like going to a christian house were there is no alcohol. I had seen 20, 30 people or more at times the target house join in to accompany. The songs about x-mas get combined with the others that become radio hits talking about cleaning a widow garden patch or farm, a candle being blown by the breeze... all kinds of crazy songs. But We do Party and did I mention that is done during weekdays? Yup you will show up to your job drunk and without sleep and is the perfect excuse. At least that was the xmas I remember in my island. During the Season nothing was safe. And a lot of crazy songs.
'Jingle Bell Rock' and 'Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer' are pretty bad...but the one that really makes me envy Helen Keller her deafness is 'The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don't Be Late)' with Alvin bitching because he wants a hula-hoop...HE DOESN'T EVEN HAVE HIPS!! I've always thought it was a bit creepy anyway, Dave Seville adopting three rodents as his children...
You just named three of my favorites. It's the religious ones I hate the most. Bah Humbug !
I love that song.