How is it possible to love and miss someone so much that it hurts and at the same time love someone new? I'm absolutely heartbroken this morning and at the same time I can't wait until Saturday because I have a date. Feels like there's a hurricane in my heart and mind at the moment.
7
Enjoy being online again!
Welcome to the community of good people who base their values on evidence and appreciate civil discourse - the social network you will enjoy.Create your free account
7 comments
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.I think we all face these feelings from time to time, even when you are in a steady loving relationship again. The feelings of love never diminish for your previous SO or spouse. We wrestle with new feelings of love and feel tremendous guilt from time to time. This was something I really struggled with. Internally I was a mess as I tried to grasp what was going on with me externally. It is possible to continue to love those we lost as well as those we currently have in our heart.
Hazydays
Level 7
Oct 10, 2018
0
I can empathize with your situation. The worst part is the loneliness. I am having trouble sleeping in our bed,and the emptiness in the house is sometimes overwhelming.
WayneDalton
Level 8
Oct 9, 2018
0
It is called change. I miss a lot of things about my late partner but do not want someone just like her. To try and replace someone with another is a huge mistake and unfair to all involved (including the late spouse/partner).
JackPedigo
Level 9
Oct 9, 2018
2
Exactly, the type of women I'm hanging out with now are not like my wife. I'll never find another old hippie like her and am not even trying. I think that keeps her memories that I have firmly in my memory and am able to move on and explore other types of relationships.
memories don't disappear. but if you allow the emotional past to dominate the emotional present and future you're going to suffer ongoing grief.
TheDoubter
Level 9
Oct 9, 2018
0
It is possible. The heart wants what it wants. It is almost two years for my loss of my husband but when I date I make sure the other person knows they are not replacing him but my husband lives in my heart and will always be a part of me. If someone cannot accept that he is not for me. I also have a date Saturday and fortunately he does understand after speaking for several weeks. So go out and enjoy!! We all need some happiness in our lives.
Rose2U
Level 7
Oct 9, 2018
2
We are very complex beings. You are at a new and probably bewildering stage in your life. You are looking forward the possibility of a new beginning with someone and at the same time still missing the love of your life who is no longer here. I suspect you are feeling a little bit guilty about it, and that is a completely natural thing to feel, but you are here and he is gone and would want you to find happiness with another I am sure. I do hope it works for you and this is the start of a beautiful new relationship. ?
Marionville
Level 10
Oct 9, 2018
1
Very nice. A couple of the men I've dated are widowers, so they are also conflicted.
@Susieq Just enjoy life...we owe it to those who have gone too soon to live and love again.
Recent Visitors 39
Photos 138 More
Posted by bookofmoronsIts been 10 years last week since I lost her. Hard to believe where that time went and yet it isn't either
Posted by RedheadedgammyToday four years ago today, at 4:15 in the morning my darling Richard passed away.
Posted by BettyEvery day. 😥
Posted by RoseyRoseToday is the anniversary of my husbands birth.
Posted by GeorgeRocheleauI know how they feel.
Posted by Sonja44All of it.
Posted by Sonja44My love would have been 61 years old today. 💔
Posted by AlchemyWow, I am grateful to find this group.
Posted by AlchemyWow, I am grateful to find this group.
Posted by Huskygirl4everToday would be our 27th anniversary it's the seventh one without you and it hurts this picture would be taken on June 12th the original date we had set for the wedding but we had to get married a ...
Posted by Huskygirl4everI remember when Norm gave this to me and the first time I ever read it I actually read my last name as Friedrich this is one of the things I will always cherish
Posted by AncientNight45 years ago, my Father told me, "Beware the Ides of March!" It was the day I got Married to my Girlfriend.
Posted by KymmacgOne of the biggest issues for me, now, even 18 years later, is the loss of life.
Posted by alonI had a nice Bacon/Cheese Omelette for my Sunday Breakfast this morning instead of my usual Eggs Benedict.
Posted by MsHolidayMemories.
Posted by MsHolidayI have chosen to place this here to let others know that we do move forward.