That's misdirected anger. As you probably already know, anger is one of the five stages of grief. (I believe there is a sixth stage). [businessballs.com]

I am angry about how my life got changed when I was so happily married. I didn't want to be single like I am now. She was a very good person and didn't deserve to die so soon or in such a way (ALS).

If I believed a god exists that let this happen, I'd be really P.O'd at him/her.

i saw my wife take her last breath. there was no anger, just sadness and acceptance of th inevitable. we expect to see our parents die and it's probably 50/50 with a spouse. but i never want to have to bury one of my children.

i saw my wife take her last breath. there was no anger, just sadness and acceptance of the inevitable.

I understand completely. I believe you are going through grief and it is rearing it's ugly head with anger. I too went through some weeks of extreme anger after Richard past away last June. I realized I was just angry at the whole world for my loss. I recently went through some Evox sessions with my therapist and have to say it helped me a lot. It took me three sessions to get everything out that I was angry about, but after that I have felt much calmer and able to handle the stress of my life trying to navigate the world alone. No one else knows what you're going through so of course they have no idea what you're dealing with in trying to get through this terrible loss. If you agree with smoking cannabis I would say do that because that has helped me a great deal to be calmer. Sending hugs your way.