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I am a lifelong Ann Arborite with a college education, a grown son, and 3 cats. I am an outgoing introvert - I love my friends and family and also like to hang out at home with a book or tv show and a cat. I have a job and hobbies and volunteer commitments but will make time for someone who enhances my life.

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Ecuador's Highest Court Approves Same-Sex Marriage - Sparking Massive Celebrations
A2Jennifer comments on Jun 14, 2019:
If the US keeps pedaling backwards, we are going to be surpassed by the so-called “shithole countries.”
Barak Obama started a trend of confrontation which continues to this day and if we don’t get a ...
A2Jennifer comments on Oct 10, 2018:
Civility toward oppressors merely allows them to continue to oppress unchallenged. Women, minorities, victims, etc have been silenced for generations. And we’re not going to stand for it anymore. No one is saying commit violence. But we will not be silenced anymore.
No one has ever noticed I don't wear eyeshadow even with a full face of makeup Wanna know a ...
A2Jennifer comments on Apr 19, 2019:
Haha! My typical makeup look is “not enough for anyone to notice” and when I put on eye shadow I always worry that I look like a clown 😂
Too funny.
A2Jennifer comments on Jun 18, 2019:
Right? I’m sure they’ll be missed 🙄
Serial vs parallel dating.. have i posted this topic already?
A2Jennifer comments on Jan 13, 2019:
I think that’s fine very early in dating but I don’t date often enough for it to come up for me. But I assume that whoever i’m dating might be seeing other people unless we’ve explicitly discussed exclusivity.
Many people live, or have lived, in small towns and that really limits the dating pool.
A2Jennifer comments on Jul 14, 2018:
Not me, but my mom grew up in a town so small, that when I visited as a kid, strangers would stop me when I was by myself and ask me whether I was Carol’s daughter or Judy’s (my mom or her sister).
Where there is no talk going on about the most concerning aspects of a relationship.
A2Jennifer comments on Aug 20, 2018:
I mean, if there ARE concerning things about the relationship and no one is talking about them, there isn’t much of a relationship. Certainly not a healthy one.
How to get rid of telemarketers
A2Jennifer comments on Dec 7, 2018:
Recently I have tried getting to a person and said “take this number off your list.” They hang up on me. But since they all route calls through fake numbers I can’t tell if it’s the same ones that keep calling.
Do any women (or men I suppose) here have experience with telling someone online y'all have ...
A2Jennifer comments on Apr 26, 2019:
Thats precisely why I just don’t respond if I decide someone isn’t a match.
Stable genius
A2Jennifer comments on Jul 16, 2019:
You just need to substitute “white” in these sentences to get the true meaning. “Make America [white] again.” “If you are not [white] in this country, you can leave.
Can anyone tell me if this is a red flag?
A2Jennifer comments on Mar 7, 2020:
I am not a fan of “testing” people but I do think you have accurately identified a red flag. I firmly believe that if you have not met a person face-to-face, that you owe them NOTHING. You don’t owe them a response, you don’t owe them a response in a certain amount of time, you definitely don’t owe it to them to meet their timeline. Both are free to simply stop communicating if they decide the interaction doesn’t have the potential they are looking for. And if someone insinuates that you owe them or makes you feel guilty that is often manipulative. I once sent a message to someone and then logged off (not here) and when I logged back on I had like 8 increasingly hostile messages that got really angry. Whew - glad that came out early!
What to expect on arrival..
A2Jennifer comments on Jan 5, 2019:
Kinda don’t blame them.
From another dating site...so very Christian
A2Jennifer comments on Nov 29, 2018:
Classy ?
I will try to keep this brief.
A2Jennifer comments on Aug 20, 2019:
Do you “love” animals but only if their existence doesn’t impact your pocketbook
Judge gives man probation for rape committed a month into probation for previous rape | WJAX-TV
A2Jennifer comments on Feb 27, 2019:
Wtf?! Shouldn’t a judge understand what “probation” means?
Denali National Park and Preserve. My bucket list!
A2Jennifer comments on Aug 5, 2019:
I didn’t make it that far north but what I saw of Alask was AMAZING
Kentucky Governor Calls Kim Davis An Inspiration ‘To The Children Of America’
A2Jennifer comments on Mar 6, 2018:
As all Christian children should aspire to marry 4 times and then impose their beliefs about marriage upon others.
Yes, say something.
A2Jennifer comments on Aug 24, 2019:
Isn’t it interesting how mostly-white farmers get “subsidies” not “welfare”?
John Dingell: How to Fix Government - The Atlantic
A2Jennifer comments on Dec 4, 2018:
He was my rep for, well longer than I’ve been alive, and his wife is now. I agree with everything he says here.
I don’t feel this way, but it made me laugh and well, I knew it would start conversation...
A2Jennifer comments on Dec 6, 2019:
Nicely summing up everything I do and don’t miss about my ex
IHOB response from Wendy's
A2Jennifer comments on Jun 11, 2018:
Wendy’s has the absolute BEST social media team!
What's a nice and natural way of opening a conversation?
A2Jennifer comments on Apr 7, 2018:
Online, Ideally, mention something specific about their profile that you share or find interesting or can ask a question about. Questions are great and keep a conversation going. NEVER use any kind of pet name or address a woman you don’t know by anything other than her name, e.g Honey, Sweetie, “Hey, Pretty eyes” or “gorgeous.” Yuck. Good advice I saw recently about complimenting women - compliment something they have control over - a skill/talent, a clothing item, etc NOT their eyes/figure.
Is touch important?
A2Jennifer comments on Dec 22, 2018:
Yeah I miss touch. The ONLY thing I miss about being married.
Men say women should come with instructions.
A2Jennifer comments on Feb 22, 2019:
The whole trope of “women are so hard to understand” is mostly an excuse for men who make no effort to listen to or understand their partner.
Ok so I’m new to this site sooooo I hope this doesn’t get me flagged.
A2Jennifer comments on Mar 5, 2018:
Don’t worry they don’t make you pay for classes or anything!
This gem I found while I was cleaning up my files in my computer.
A2Jennifer comments on Jul 28, 2019:
Funny - like when people think Obama said something they think it’s terrible but if Trump said it it’s great.
CONFESSION: Yes, it's my fault for trying to date in a stupidly religious state but after the ...
A2Jennifer comments on Jul 24, 2018:
Well, that probably won’t accomplish anything ?. I sometimes get a match labeled “95%” - and the other 5% is Catholic. NOPE. I get the idea of respecting someone else’s opinions, but when their basic beliefs about the world are in total conflict with mine, that’s not something I want to avoid talking about with a partner.
This is cute. :)
A2Jennifer comments on Apr 24, 2018:
Hahaha!
I've asked this question in a different forum, and the answers were interesting.
A2Jennifer comments on Sep 28, 2018:
I didn’t really date before I was married for a long time, so I was a dating newbie after my divorce. Luckily my best friend taught me some basic safety rules. First meeting always in a public place - do not give him your address nor get into his car on first meet. Before date, give best friend time, location and info on date (name, phone number, etc) Friend checks in at a pre-determined time to make sure you are ok. As for guys - there is really nothing to be “worried” about if you treat women like human beings. Then, Make sure she’s into you before touching her. Make sure she is enthusiastically consenting to sex rather than “giving in” to persistence.
Anyone else hate being the only one who doesn’t bow their heads and/or close their eyes when some ...
A2Jennifer comments on Jul 9, 2018:
Anyone who catches you must not have been closing their eyes either!!
Racist commercial! Popeyes chicken commercial is racial.
A2Jennifer comments on Aug 5, 2018:
Dude no. What you have described is not remotely racist. People being dorks is part of the human experience. No one is targeting white people to make them look bad in advertising or reinforcing harmful stereotypes against white people. And the media is not “pushing” interracial relationships. You thinking 90% of anything shows interracial relationships only says that you are hyper-aware of those examples.
I realized something today about myself.
A2Jennifer comments on Jun 10, 2019:
When someone decides not to continue a text conversation, it’s not “ghosting.” She doesn’t owe you anything. She decided that she wasn’t interested in pursuing things further with you. Maybe you revealed some aspect of yourself that is a dealbreaker for her. Or maybe you just revealed yourself to be a narcissistic jerk. You can choose to self-evaluate or you can choose to assume that “it’s not you it’s her.”
Today a potential date asked me "would you say life has been fair to you?
A2Jennifer comments on Aug 23, 2019:
I was raised in the phrase “life is tough.” So, no, I did not expect life would be “fair” to me.
I had a female friend tell me about the stages of dating many years ago.
A2Jennifer comments on Feb 7, 2019:
Huh. I seem to have skipped from 1 to 4.
Yay!!! Level Seven!! I really want a tee shirt. Level 8 seems soooo far though.
A2Jennifer comments on Aug 22, 2018:
It is - I have been level 7 FOREVER!
I think using my depression against me was the best weapon used against me.
A2Jennifer comments on Sep 13, 2018:
Whatever your weakness is, they find and exploit it.
Does the Universe have to make sense?
A2Jennifer comments on Jan 12, 2018:
I think atheists are more often people who accept that we cannot know everything and don’t have to have all the answers. People invented gods to explain things that they couldn’t understand. I’m Ok with not having all the answers.
I am not listening to State of Union Address.
A2Jennifer comments on Feb 6, 2019:
Yeah I just can’t listen to that guy. It makes me angry.
Often I "hover" by accident..."visit" is always intentional...
A2Jennifer comments on Sep 9, 2018:
And visit does not necessarily indicate screening for potential partners
Uh-huh! We all agree!
A2Jennifer comments on Dec 5, 2018:
I saw this posted and lol’d at Michelle’s bubble!
Often I "hover" by accident..."visit" is always intentional...
A2Jennifer comments on Sep 9, 2018:
And visit does not necessarily indicate screening for potential partners
Supreme Court allows Ohio's and other state's voter purges. [abcnews.go.com]
A2Jennifer comments on Jun 11, 2018:
That SUCKS. Carefully times to remove people who are newly motivated to get to the polls by the current political situation.
Octosquish?
A2Jennifer comments on Aug 5, 2018:
Spider fish? Slap monster?
I’ve just had a bit of a breakthrough I just realized I’m still angry with Jeff (My ex ...
A2Jennifer comments on Jan 27, 2020:
I relate to a lot of this. I spent 20 years in a relationship/marriage to someone who perceived others only in terms of what they could do for him. And because he was an adept gaslighted, he convinced me to see myself that way too. I’m nearly 5 years out now and still dealing with the ramifications.
Does anyone have a strong opinion on Alex Jones recently being de-platformed on Youtube, Spotify and...
A2Jennifer comments on Aug 12, 2018:
Free speech means free from censorship or punishment by the government, so not technically that. But I’m not sure I want Mark Zuckerberg’s employees deciding who gets a platform and who doesn’t. I have seen posts from admins of atheist FB groups indicating that their groups were suspended due to content that violates community standards. But they don’t tell you what content they have deemed inappropriate. And you only get one chance to remove the offending content, or the group would be shut-down.
I am watching a Netflix show "How To Get Away With Murder" I have only been paying half attention.
A2Jennifer comments on May 25, 2019:
That is not a Netflix show. It’s like 4 seasons in on ABC.
I noticed I have been having a headache every day for weeks now.
A2Jennifer comments on Dec 3, 2019:
I’m going to go with “yes.”
What does it mean when someone relies to messages, but has never initiated contact?
A2Jennifer comments on Dec 4, 2019:
If you have never met a person IRL, it’s not ghosting. It is simply deciding you don’t wish to continue texting. You’re allowed to do that.
LOL. WTF?
A2Jennifer comments on Apr 3, 2019:
I am offended on behalf of cashews.
What is love?
A2Jennifer comments on Dec 20, 2018:
Baby don’t hurt me. Don’t hurt me, no more.
So question of course.
A2Jennifer comments on Aug 24, 2018:
I’m a non-drinker. I would be fine with someone who drinks socially. I would not be comfortable with a partner who regularly drinks to intoxication. But that’s me. I think as adults, you are willing to compromise some things for the right relationship and not others, and those things are different for everyone.
I look forward to the day when people take classes in school on how to raise children.
A2Jennifer comments on Dec 2, 2018:
It IS just as bad. Physical abuse is at least easily recognizable. Even a child will eventually figure out that it’s not ok for someone to hit them. Emotional abuse is insidious. It changes what you think about yourself.
For those that have come into contact with scammers and probable “dating “ scammers on apps and ...
A2Jennifer comments on Nov 18, 2018:
Terrible grammar
[nytimes.
A2Jennifer comments on Dec 17, 2017:
Yep. The thing that rings most true to me is the “us vs them” thing. And because so many of these people lives in rural or racially homogenous areas, they rarely encounter “others.” Which makes it easier to vilify them.
Just after I moved into my present location (2013) I started dating a gentleman.
A2Jennifer comments on Jan 3, 2019:
And that kid in high school lost both parents in less than a year ?
I dont know if I have done a good thing or a bad thing?
A2Jennifer comments on Apr 24, 2019:
It sounds like you did your best to be kind to her, and that’s the best you can do .
What's up with Gilmore Girls. My 12yo is addicted to it. Should I be worried?
A2Jennifer comments on Jan 16, 2019:
Nope - it’s a good show. Very girl power. Nothing TOO advanced for a preteen.
Religious Freedom
A2Jennifer comments on Jul 20, 2018:
Which neighbor is Indiana opposed to loving? I’m from Michigan, and here it’s Ohio!
Mad In America
A2Jennifer comments on Jul 9, 2018:
Oh I just thought you were stating your current condition, in which case you would be in good company!
A controversial startup that charges $8,000 to fill your veins with young blood now claims to be up ...
A2Jennifer comments on Jan 18, 2019:
With a perpetual shortage of NEEDED blood, lets use it for a ridiculous pursuit of lost youth ?
I dont like kissing. It feels and looks stupid. Anyone else feel this way?
A2Jennifer comments on Apr 24, 2019:
I have been single for a long time now - the thing I miss most is a really good kiss.
Damn right, Sylvia.
A2Jennifer comments on Jan 9, 2018:
Unfortunately something that has to be said
A Miscarrying Woman Nearly Died After a Catholic Hospital Sent Her Home Three Times ...
A2Jennifer comments on Sep 28, 2019:
All those conservatives that squawked about how the ACA would lead to “death panels.” Abortion bans ACTUALLY result in death panels. They have to convene a committee to decide whether it’s ok to save a woman’s life because her potential fetus is more important. This is disgusting.
Of the people in your life that have hurt you the most, personally.
A2Jennifer comments on Jun 7, 2019:
My ex is (was?) an atheist. An authority-hating, sociopathic atheist. He was cruel and abusive and an all-around shitty person. Atheism doesn’t make you a good person, it just removes some of the barriers.
Has anyone here had a problem quitting cigarettes?
A2Jennifer comments on Apr 24, 2018:
You’re lucky. Some people get really messed up by Chantix. It’s dangerous for people suffering from depression/anxiety.
A toxic life, is to deal with I was molested age 5 in a controlling Catholic environment.
A2Jennifer comments on Jun 28, 2018:
Sorry about that. People are so ignorant about abuse. “Why didn’t you tell someone?” SOOOK many reasons. ESPECIALLY when the victim was a child. So glad you are working to help other survivors - it is good for them and also you.
Texas Federal Judge says Obamacare is unconstitutional.
A2Jennifer comments on Dec 14, 2018:
Yeah conservatives are still trying to dismantle this but taking health insurance away from people might actually get them to complain. 3 states voted in Medicaid expansion under the ACA this November because their republican congress wouldn’t pass it.
My abusive ex's friend is apparently a regular in my local watering hole.
A2Jennifer comments on Aug 24, 2018:
He’s not just friends of an abuser. A man who would call you a name without even knowing you is also abusive. Birds of a feather... I guess.
This twit was, I am sorry to say, from my town.
A2Jennifer comments on Aug 9, 2018:
Few people have the gall to actually demand white privileged out loud
I filled out a short personal information form tonight, in order to receive some New Year's Eve ...
A2Jennifer comments on Jan 1, 2020:
That’s weird. Kind of sounds like there is some other purpose to the questionnaire. My program collects demographic data including gender identity, with several options including transgender and allowing people to choose all that they feel apply to them. Something seems strange to me to ask that separately.
My youngest daughter thinks Santa Claus is a short, middle aged, Italian/Puerto Rican lady.
A2Jennifer comments on Dec 20, 2018:
People usually imagine fictional characters as being similar to themselves. Is SHE a short, middle-aged Italian/Puerto lady, by any chance?
Since I am tired of the impeachment process already, I am changing topics.
A2Jennifer comments on Nov 14, 2019:
If I exercise late it keeps me awake. But I am SOOOO not a “get up early to workout” type either. I get some exercise every day though, usually between work and dinner.
Graphic Epstein autopsy photos on '60 Minutes' show bloodied neck and noose - AOL Entertainment
A2Jennifer comments on Jan 6, 2020:
Who cares? He’s slime and he’s dead.
I would like some feedback.
A2Jennifer comments on Aug 21, 2018:
Just today I heard the comment that as men get more successful, their dating pool expands, but as women get more successful, their pool shrinks. I figure any man who is intimidated or put-off by my intelligence and education is not the guy for me.
Evangelical group wants gays removed from anti-lynching bill
A2Jennifer comments on Jan 9, 2019:
I’m gonna go out on a limb and say that you are either against lynching people or you aren’t. Reserving the right to lynch *certain* people means you aren’t.
Parents, be warned!
A2Jennifer comments on Jun 12, 2019:
Hah! Imagining this with music instead of art, because I have a band kid.
Hmm? Satanists?
A2Jennifer comments on Nov 21, 2018:
Probably not out HERE, since this is a site for non-theists.
Advice on time management?
A2Jennifer comments on Apr 1, 2019:
I feel you. I got my undergrad degree while my son was small and I worked part-time. Now he is grown and I’m doing a full-time Masters program while working full time. It’s HARD. It’s hard for EVERYONE. Something’s got to give. Learn to speed read (seriously - the trick is to not “say” the words in your head) Accept that things don’t have to be perfect. It turns out that the bathroom doesn’t need to be cleaned twice a week (one good clean a week is enough), the floors don’t have to be swept every day, and sometimes it’s ok to buy prepared food so you don’t have to cook. Also, I firmly believe that my son is the independent, responsible young man he is today in part because I was an overwhelmed young parent. If they can safely do a task, show them how, supervise the next time, then let them make their own damn sandwich! Lastly, keep plugging - it doesn’t last forever!
Do atheists have morals without religion?
A2Jennifer comments on Jan 8, 2018:
I’ve just finished a great book titled “The Righteous Mind.” It is a fascinating look at oral psychology, and how people came to have the moral beliefs that we have. Many of our moral instincts have an evolutionary basis, like for care of the weak, for fairness, loyalty, disgust. But our culture and experiences shape how those instincts are expressed today. Religion has its own application and interpretation of most of these, but is definitely not necessary for morality.
At what point are things assumed to be exclusive?
A2Jennifer comments on Sep 23, 2019:
I would assume you are NOT exclusive unless you have explicitly agreed to be. Very surprised that your 22 year old son didn’t say the same.
If I had it all to do again, I doubt very much I would meet my husband.
A2Jennifer comments on Mar 30, 2018:
I would. When I married my ex we already had our son. At every stage of our relationship, the more committed “we” (meaning “I”) got, the worse he treated me. Once we got married, he never did another thing for me. He stopped contributing to our household in any way (financial, instrumental, parenting etc) and became increasingly abusive. The only reason to do things the way we did, I don’t know if I ever would’ve been able to let him go if I didn’t go through everything he put me through.
Question from a newbie to this forum, but not a newbie Atheist.
A2Jennifer comments on Jan 22, 2018:
I think that people who describe themselves as “spiritual but not religious” don’t NECESSARILY believe in god, but that many do. When I see that I sometimes wonder if people don’t really “believe” in a god but are hesitant to publicly declare that.
Hey, all.
A2Jennifer comments on Oct 17, 2019:
My best friend heard from a guy she went out with a couple of times like 10 years before. Now they’ve been together for 3 years and just got engaged.
Convention advice
A2Jennifer comments on Mar 8, 2018:
Atheist Convention? FFRF convention? Anyway, Have fun! Maybe someday I’ll do one of those.
UPDATE: There will not be a second date and that's a good thing.
A2Jennifer comments on Nov 30, 2019:
As a rule I don’t even consider dating men with my ex’s name. It’s weird.
A quick grammar question
A2Jennifer comments on Mar 8, 2018:
HAHA! I vote Bigfoots!
It is probably an effect of the abuse I have had, but I've noticed when I'm ill or injured I become ...
A2Jennifer comments on Mar 16, 2019:
I found myself doing that with my son after my divorce. “Mom, JUST ASK!” He said. I had developed a pattern of feeling terribly guilty and unreasonable and feeling like I needed to have 3 good reasons to apologetically ask for even the smallest thing from my ex. Not that it worked - he still made me feel like a selfish demanding bitch for asking.
One test of the five facet model.
A2Jennifer comments on Sep 26, 2019:
I did not find my results accurate.
Stephen King fan here.
A2Jennifer comments on Mar 29, 2018:
The Green Mile was very good and very true to the book, as I recall. He has recently talked about how his stories are better suited to a longer form of storytelling, like a mini-series, as opposed to a film.
Do you donate essential medical fluids from altruism, or from a financial perspective?
A2Jennifer comments on Sep 24, 2018:
Lots of people donate at the Red Cross for nothing. Including me when I’m allowed to.
'Hobnobbing With Billionaires in Davos,' Trump Admits—If Reelected—He Will Seek to Cut Social ...
A2Jennifer comments on Jan 22, 2020:
Make sure that ALL the old folks who support Trump see this.
Question for the ladies: If you had 5 men, all meeting your personal physical prerequisites for ...
A2Jennifer comments on Aug 29, 2018:
Honesty, curiousity, empathy, intelligence, sense of humor, responsibility Turn offs: rudeness, bullying
I've had enough.
A2Jennifer comments on Jun 28, 2018:
Good for you. It’s better to be alone than with anyone who would treat you badly.
So I need some advice.
A2Jennifer comments on Jun 29, 2018:
If you can’t live your life with these people in it, then you have to find a way to get them out of your life. There is no shame in removing toxic people from your life.
I am not perfect but I'm always myself
A2Jennifer comments on Aug 3, 2018:
That’s my philosophy now. I spent my marriage trying to be what he wanted me to be, and constantly being told that I deserved abuse and mistreatment because I was “not perfect either.” Now I know I will only be myself, and anyone who doesn’t think I’m awesome is not someone I need in my life.
I just turned on the "open to dating " section of my profile.
A2Jennifer comments on Jan 1, 2019:
The percentages here are USELESS. They don’t collect enough information to determine compatibility.
Name a song with "baby" in the title. I think the Motown hits had the most. How about you?
A2Jennifer comments on Jul 10, 2019:
Babe I’m Gonna leave you - a slight variation of “baby” but the best band EVER
Half a wing? [youtube.com]
A2Jennifer comments on Jan 10, 2018:
Bummer I was hoping for a good trex joke
Why would a white woman in Oakland,CA, waste the time of the 911 emergency ops over a non-life and ...
A2Jennifer comments on May 12, 2018:
There have been a disturbing number of situations like this in the news recently - white people calling police because the presence of brown people made them uncomfortable. Situations where the police never would’ve been called if they had involved white people - For grilling, golfing, touring a college campus. It is really appalling.
A light chuckle I saw today probably old and lame. I lost my phone number. Can I have yours. ?
A2Jennifer comments on Aug 4, 2018:
No worse than most pick up lines

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Atheist, Humanist, Secularist, Skeptic, Freethinker
Open to meeting men
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  • Joined Sep 28th, 2017
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