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Is anyone else scared to death to start over?

pamb68 5 Aug 31

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81 comments

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2

I think it is kind of like base diving if you don't spread your wings you will fall like a rock.

8

I've done it so many times that I've completely changed how I look at it.
You really aren't "starting over". You're just moving on to the next thing.
Life is always moving. You have to move with it.
I don't think there's much worse than being "stuck".
So, try not to be "scared". You're just moving to the next thing.
You're going to be fine. 😉

5

Nah...circle of life. It can be intimidating but it isn't like you have many options at that point. One foot in front of the other and enjoy the scenery

4

I’ve started over many times, most drastically. I was in financial services as a mortgage broker, realtor, securities dealer and just for good measure I was licensed for life health and variable annuity and through notary just to top it off. Wasn’t happy so when I found out that my wife had a boyfriend I stopped getting haircuts, got a tattoo and a divorce and took a year off before taking a job in a music store. It was not scary perhaps because it felt like it was the best path forward (mentally) and I never looked back. I never want to do a job I hate just because the money is better... I left the rat race!

4

I was married to a wonderful woman for 36 years. Then, she died. So I'm starting over.

Yeah, it's scarey. How does one live a single life? Who am I now as a single man? What is the new dating etiquette? How can a person not be sharing his life and still be well adjusted, happy and live a life of depth and meaning? I have to find answers.

My story exactly, even the 36 years. I am moving on but it's lonely not having the day to day interaction with a woman.

4

Scared and tired of falling flat on my face. This shit ain't easy!

4

No, not at all. After my 25 year marriage ended, I realized that I was finally free. I have moved to different states, alone and not knowing a soul and have made lifelong friends. I retired, leaving my beloved midwifery practice to a young midwife, and have loved being free again. I have done lots of starting over, and I love it. It is an exciting adventure. I have dated also, but I haven't felt strongly enough about any of the men to give up my precious freedom. Maybe someday.

4

Not really when it comes to moving.

3

I met Dan, fell in love and I'm starting all over again outside Albany,NY where I lived 35 years ago. Neither one of us are scared; we've yet to have a disagreement nor an argument.

3

Nothing worthwhile is easy.

3

Out of necessity, I've done it a couple of times. It's always scary cuz you have no idea how things will play out, it's natural to be scared when facing the unknown. Remember this, there is no courage without fear, and no true success without the possibility of failure. None have a sure or certain future or obvious path, and failure along the way will indeed follow any significant change. You control only two things, your attitude and your persistence. Use them to overcome your struggle. Good luck. ?

3

I've had to start over several times. I'm not so scared of it now. It's just another chapter in the book.

I refer to them as past lives.

3

I'm not scared, but I'm reluctant to inflict my cynicism and doubt on some innocent nice guy.

There is a song maybe Bill Withers. ..."if it feels this good being used then USE ME UP. ..." doubt is good, that's how I became an Atheist age 5 and cynical as hell too. ....Santa Claus = lies alleged vaginal virgin Miriam in a dirty donkey stable = same down the chimney lies....boy easter bunnies laying candy eggs on dogshit lawns. ...never ate those lies either. ...my mom getting baptized when I was 9 she's blowing snot out her nose and coughing water out her mouth a white wet sheet showing her wet black bra&panties in front of 87 people that day..... come ON NOW who really believes this religious SHIT? ??? I guess women were so scared of getting pregnant burning in hell a new marriage to a nice Feminist Atheist guy like me reminds y'all of that pain even after menopause when we finally can be happy lovers without diapers and breastfeeding anymore

3

No.

If you feel afraid of being vulnerable, I suggest you watch "The Power of Vulnerability" by Brene' Brown. This 20-minute TED Talk changed my life.

[ted.com]

3

Scared no - cautious yes.

3

"Success is not final, failure is not fatal. It is the courage to continue that counts." -- Winston Churchill

3

Starting over; no. I was terrified of being alone which is why I stayed in bad relationships. I've been alone now for over 6yrs and (for the most part) love it.

3

I was, it gets better

3

No, I have done it more than once. The thought is scary, but the doing is exhilarating.

3

Starting over has been a way of life for me.It has become more difficult as l have gotten older.

3

In a way, every new day is "starting over".

2

Just look at it as another opportunity to reinvent yourself! Think positive, have fun...

2

Hell no. I start over all of the time. Nothing will defeat me except the grim reaper.

2

No. I've picked up and moved several times. Usually it was because I needed a new chalange. When my job stopped teaching me anything new it was time to move.

2

After my divorce, after a hellish marriage, I knew I needed to get back with my ex like I needed a hole in the head. Nevertheless, I've missed being married, in and of itself. Marriage is a great anchor, and I've felt like a migrant ever since.

godef Level 7 Sep 1, 2018
2

Hell yes
Glad I did
Still scary

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