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Things that people put in dating profiles that are pet peeves. Discuss.

ArthurPhillips 6 Apr 17
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26 comments

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16

I know it's a dating profile, but I do not need to know that you dick is long and thick. I also do not need to know that you are long lasting and love oral.

Dear Gods people, leave something to talk about.

I can't stop got giggling over this

Ha ha!!’

No kidding. I just read one here that made me wonder if I was reading a CraigsList ad for sex. Just sex. Specific sex. No class.

@Thatguyy Agreed. Also you know a guy who constantly has to talk about all of his conquests all the time is actually saying that he and his hand are quite intimate.

13

"Recently divorced" which translate to, looking for someone to take my frustrations out on and compare to my ex. Male or female, run from the "recently divorced".

people should take a year after a divorce is finalized before dating.

@MrPKitty A year is the perfect. At that point, you should have at least shed some of the emotional baggage from the previous partner.

12

The ‘guess who’ profile pictures. All of them are group photos. I have better things to do than play the matching game.

Pics of their pet, or anything else that is not the person. I’ll be honest, I have to be at least a little bit attracted to a girl physically. Sorry. That’s what the profile pics are for.

Right?!

8

I like long walks on the beach... cuddling,star gazing,I don’t drink or smoke... blah blah blah... 99% lies...
If they would tell the truth It would eliminate a lot of wasted time... (My view)

I agree with this. Long walks on the beach, and cuddling with their special lady. Is there a manual that men use to write a dating profile? I really prefer a less contrived date.

It's just the same on women's profiles. Long walks in the country and a log fire. No other interests. Shallow people.

6

Shirtless in every pic. Or holding booze in every pic. And the phrase "if you don't look like your picture, you're buying me drinks until you do"

I’m in MN so in addition to being shirtless they’re usually holding a dead fish, ducks or deer. I’m not anti-hunting but do you have other interests?

Enough drinks and Mr. Furley can look like Brad Pitt fast.

Now that is funny!!!

6
  1. People who write next to nothing except, "I'm not very good at this."
  2. People who use profile pics that show them with other people. How am I supposed to know which one you are?!
  3. People who use profile pics that look like they were taken from a block away. Hey, no one's perfect, and looks aren't everything, but if you're afraid to let me see your face I'm going to presume you're trying to hide something.

Alternately to 1) is someone who writes a flipping book for their profile. Like when it takes 10 minutes to read it all

@Marcie1974 After 3-5 lines, I'm going to lose interest. If I haven't figured out by 3-5 lines if I'm going to be sleeping with you, I know it's not happening.

@ArthurPhillips so is sleeping with someone all you’re looking for?

@Marcie1974 Yes. And I'm not vague about that at all. It's all right up front.

@ArthurPhillips I can respect that. I hate the assholes that act like they want more but are just looking for one night.

@Marcie1974 Precisely. And my profile does not reflect my ability to have an intelligent conversation either. I may be a horndog, but I'm a multi-faceted horndog.

I didn't say they had to write a book. But I have literally seen ads where all they said was, "I don't know what to write. I'm not very good at this."

6

A few things...
Empty profiles.
They are separated
Or, their only skill is being a good listener. 😟

yeah, separated

@MrLizard As long as you have skillz. 😉

I don't have a problem with a lady who remains separated. There's usually a solid and very sensible reason that has to do with insurance, terms of the pending divorce, etc. Women usually raised the kids instead of developed a career, plus we all know they make less for the same work, 90% of the time. I don't fault them for their survival skills to stay separated as long as possible for the financial benefits. It's usually an amicable agreement with all parties.

I don't get what's wrong with separated. Divorces can take years to sort out, depending on complex financial issues, house sales, child custody etc. Is the separated person supposed to live like a monk/nun for all that time?

@MrLizard A poor listener is fine if the goal is not deep conversation, I suppose.

6

When guys describe themselves as handsome. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Ha ha.... women do that too! If that's important to get across to us, then all they need is one honest, clear, recent and dated photo that's NOT a "glamour" shot and NOT in a Halloween costume. It's the viewer's choice to decide who looks good and who's simply a narcissist.

@mtnhome yeah, even if I thought I was beautiful, I would certainly never actually say it! Definitely a difference between self confidence and arrogance

6

Assuming your looking at women in dating sites: When I see two women, in the same pic (which one are you?). When I see a man and woman in the same pic, I wonder if that is her boyfriend.

6

Not being honest whike declaring that is what they are looking for.

5

Loves long walks when what they actually mean is drinking a cup of coffee whilst walking around the local park

3

A huge list of what they don't want, are not looking for, based on previous partners failings, followed by a list of unrealistic expectations they have for any potential future partner.

3

Laundry lists of requirements as prerequisites. I.e.
Must be:
Non smoker
Make a minimum of (enter amount here)
Vegan/vegetarian
Democrat
A virgo or capricorn
Must love cats
Like Opera music

I get it's important to have things in common, but let's be a little realistic!

2

When they say they like to travel but have never traveled. I have deal breakers and I am honest. For instance: No Trump voters (I will never respect you,sorry), must like dogs, I will never marry again, understand that going in, no hats in warm weather, no drunks or dopers although I'm fine with weed (I get baked myself when my arthritis fires up) and social drinking.

Too funny!!! Love it!

2

No pet peeves the more they put down the better. I want them to put their crazy crap out their so I know to move on. Glad I’m no longer single

2

I don’t have one, if someone posts things that rub me the wrong way that’s a sign of Incompatibility, it’s easier to sift the sand at the surface🙂

2

No picture

2

When they describe themselves as average. Or just put information about themselves that could apply to anyone. IE, “I’m an average guy/girl who likes to have fun.”

Run.

2

Havent been on a lot of standard dating site but stating the mechanical description of sexual preference in the intro is a bit much for me. Maybe later or maybe a different kind of a site more related to "coupling"

1

So many of them...

Top of the list: "Don't be offended if I don't reply to your message, it just means we're not compatible" - rude bitches!
On POF "I don't have Meet Me", or worse, "I am not got meet me"
Interested in long walks in the country and snuggling in front of a log fire (but no other meaningful interests)
Angry lists of things they don't want - ONS, FWB, players, short men (luckily I'm tall).

1

Religion-Other (and then they don't elaborate.)
Christian (non-starter unless mitigated)
Gentleman must be 6' or taller (1. Lose weight; 2. Try to love someone besides yourself)
Endless reading/music lists.
Post-operative transexual
Pre-operative transexual
Answered >500 questions
Anti-male comments.
No reply to a sincere query (Yes, you're just so busy being rude; maybe the grapes really are sour.)
Pervasive spelling and grammatical errors
Unable to determine if candidate is geographically undesireable

1

Pictures that are seriously out of date. One person (not here) took a picture of herself from her high school yearbook, you could see the bend in the page plus the binding. The beehive hairdo was another tip off. But actually, the biggest pet peeve is the mysteriously cropped arm that shows up around someone's shoulder in their profile pic. Hopefully someday someone will post a picture with a mysteriously cropped ankle and foot around their shoulder just to score some weird points.

1

When they claim to love rodeo. How can anyone love animal abuse?

Some people still don't know what rodeos are all about. Kinda like "professional" wrestling. 😉

Save a horse, ride a cowboy.

1

I don't look at dating profile photos, as it's the male's job to contact me first. After someone messages me on the website, then I look at his profile.

But usually any man who contacts me hasn't even looked at my profile and knows nothing about me, which I find insulting, even though I know appearance matters most to men.
They just see a photo and make up their minds.

Why is it the male's job to do the chasing? What kind of outdated stereotype is that?

Why is it the man's job to message you first? It's 2018!

@ArthurPhillips (sigh) Despite all the silly sexist rhetoric about both genders being "equal"-they aren't. If a male isn't attracted to female himself and doing his own pursuing, he's not ever going to be committed..he'll be looking around for someone more picky and challenging...someone HE chose.

Women who pursue men are showing masculine traits, since they are hardwired to be predators, except for men heavy in picky female traits. I'd NEVER pursue a man because I'm not interested in them. Men have to pursue me and get ME interested in them, make me choose them over all my other choices. If men don't like it, I could care less.

@birdingnut That's a really interesting thought. Never looked at it that way.

0

I've talked to women about it and they say half the guys profile pics they're holding up a fish they caught.. not impressed

Just throwing it out there... showing a fish at least shows that your not a total loser... you enjoy the outdoors. Lol

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