18 13

Islam allows a man to have four wives. Why does Islam not allow a woman to have four husbands?

anglophone 8 July 27

Enjoy being online again!

Welcome to the community of good people who base their values on evidence and appreciate civil discourse - the social network you will enjoy.

Create your free account


Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.


Because some of the men may give her better sex and none of the other men want to be a loser in the dick department.

Ah, that group of men who use their testicles as a substitute for their brains. 🙂

@anglophone When they were passing out brains the men hid because they thought they were saying RAIN.


Because it's a man's world no matter the religion.😒

And I have major issues about it being a man's world. I do all I can to further the cause of equality.


One explanation given is that it allows a man to marry and support the widows of men killed in battle.


My guess is that it is an overtly sexist dogma intended to, among other things, keep women in an inferior subservient role. But I'm willing to listen to someone explain it to me in non-dogmatic terms.

zeuser Level 9 July 27, 2022

My own prejudices align with your thinking about keeping women subservient.

That is my thought, too. Women get treated like chattle. In fundamentalist Mormonism, faithful men are rewarded by being allowed to marry more women, and they can be punished by having wives taken away and given to other men.


We subjugate the fuck out of our women and treat them like second-class citizens/property/incubators now. Don't think we have much room to talk about how any country or religion treats their women.

I would not say that about all American men. But it seems true about Christian nationalists. They are open about their desire for patriarchy. And of course Madison Avenue has long objectified women in advertising.

I'm not just taking about men. Women are voting to take rights away from women here as well. So if some men don't, it doesn't much matter on a nation-wide scale. Just like there's probably some Muslim men that don't have more than one wife, but that didn't prevent commentary on the fact that they're allowed to.

@ChestRockfield It's true that there are many women who support the subjugation of women. In fact, one could argue that it couldn't happen without their active collusion.

@Flyingsaucesir For sure. They are a majority. They could, if they cared about their rights more than anything else, vote as a bloc and control every single elected and appointed position in the country. Instead, men are actually more pro-choice than women now (according to a poll Maher referenced on his show).

@ChestRockfield I think it's because the women with more than one child want the rest of the female population to be just as miserable as they are.

@K9JetLee999 🤣 Probably. But then why do these mothers continue to have more babies??

@ChestRockfield The husbands want them barefoot and pregnant. They probably have no money for doc appointments and don't know how to pay for the birth control.


Islam allows a man to have four wives with the provision that he can support them. I believe that there is a requirement that he has to treat all of them equally with no favouritism.

A rich man regardless of his religious or non-religious views can have many mistresses and the same could be said of a rich woman who can have many lovers. The simple fact is that those who can afford it may have as many relationships as they wish.

Are you saying that Muslim women can have affairs with no repercussions? Is that only if she is not found out?

@Gwendolyn2018 Everybody knows that there are repercussions if a Muslim woman has an affair and she is found out. The barbaric practice of stoning a woman or a man to death is not practiced by all Muslim countries.



@ASTRALMAX I knew that, but you are saying that only applies to poor people . . .

@Gwendolyn2018 She does run the risk of stoning by the Taliban if caught fornicating...but so does a man, if he is not politically connected...

@Flyingsaucesir gotcha.


There is actually a very simple reason for this: to produce as many children as possible. Women having many husbands is counterproductive in this area: a woman could have four husbands, but she is still going to have only one child at a time.

In the vast majority of cultures, producing children was important. In Judaism, men were supposed to spread their seed. This is one reason why masturbation was a sin: no children would be produced. In the later Sumer underworld, Kur, men who had sired many children were rewarded but childless men were not. Women who could not bear children were like empty pots, sitting around crying. This is also why men could divorce wives who seemed to be infertile--the woman was generally at fault if she did not get pregnant.

Having male children was also paramount. Male children carried the name and that was a type of "immortality."

There were cultures wherein women could have more than one husband, but the only one I remember was one in Tibet (I think it was Tibet, at least).

This would not have been originally linked to religion, but as with other things, it became a part of religion to justify and encourage the practice.

A traditional Mormon explanation for their practice of polygamy was to produce more children, but as I recall, the statistics refute the effectiveness of the practice! - at least as far as Mormons were concerned. They also tried to explsin their practice of it by saying it was a way of taking care of women which they claimed outnumbered men, but this claim was also contradicted by statistics. Where the Mormon practice of polygamy was concerned, I believe it was originally due to an overly amorous founder, Joseph Smith. Smith had been accused by his cousin of adultery with a young women who lived in his household to help his wife. She was later referred to as his first plural wife, but the adultery accusation was years prior to Mormon polygamy being introduced as an institution - sort of an after-the-fact justification.

Among mammalixn species, males breeding with multiple females appearps to be extremely common. Males of many species compete for breeding rights typically with all females within the territory the male can maintain. We don't see the same competition among females. Breeding strategies among humans seems to be that males tend to breed to spread their genetics widely being less discriminating in partners than are females. Women seem to select mates with a man who will stay with her to support her and her children but may "cheat" on her selected mate with a male who may be stronger, smarter, or more "fit" in other ways than her selected mate. Human women are seen as having a greater biological investment in their children while human men are seen as having more interest in spreading their biologic investment in a wider net. Certain pieces of research appear to support this conclusion.

Where religion enters the picture, like so many other aspect of human culture and behaviors, it seems to justify and normalize whatever behaviors are practiced and institue them to possibly reduce the anxiety among individuals over whatever the behaviors are. Sometimes it benefits more of the members of the society and sometimes benefits only a few.

With regard to women having multiple husbands, Tibet was one of the few cultures that found this practice acceptable and appeared to be related to limited assests like land for growing crops. What I read about the Tibetian practice was that it was not terribly common and most often occurred when two brothers shared an inherited farm and they shared a wife between them. The only other culture I am aware of was an Amazonian tribe where a woman was expected to have several husbands and each husband was supposed to be from different age groups to avoid undue competition between them. The woman was expected to bare children fron each of her husbands and could gain a poor reputation if she had too many children from any one of her husbands.

@RussRAB I agree that Smith just wanted to lay a lot of women!

What you wrote about the Tibet system is the same as I read, but it was some time ago. I did not know about the Amazon tradition. Without DNA testing, I guess they compared facial and other features to determine who was the father!

@Gwendolyn2018 - My source for the Amazonian tribe was some time ago as well, and I don't know how they would determine who fathered a woman's child. The source didn't tell us that. They may have had a practice of abstanance when a child was young and then the woman would only have sex with one of her husbands until she became pregnant. My father had always been interested in native Americans. He had said that one famous chief (I don't remember who) had been ridiculed because his wife had had a child while she was still suckling an infant. If this was the tradition - not to have a child until an older one was weaned - I don't know how native Americans would accomplish it unless they practiced some kind of abstanance.

@RussRAB breastfeeding was sometimes thought to be a form of birth control and that women could not get pregnant while nursing a child. It was an old wife's tale!


Until we are able to teach girls that the concept of marriage is unnecessary, we'll have to keep fighting this battle.

Equal pay would likely boost the number of women that choose to not marry as well as the number of women that choose to leave unsatisfactory marriages.

I didn't marry or have kids and get asked what is wrong with me by rude people with limited minds. WTF, it's a choice not a character flaw!

@MizJ Religion needs to be demonized as well. Since it's primarily religion that perpetuates this bullshit.


Why would a woman want four husbands? Seriously though, the Q'uran says that if a man gets pleasure or children from a woman, he is supposed to take care of her forever. So, in theory, when a man tires of his first wife, he does not toss her into the street to fend for herself in a male-dominated world. She and her children have a home. Hopefully the work of housekeeping and child care is shared among the multiple wives.

The biggest problem with polygamy in various cultures is that the women are subjugated. If they had equal power we might call it polyamory.

I have come across several groups of polyamory and have found that women do not have equal power in those groups. They think they do but reality is different.

"the Q'uran says that if a man gets pleasure or children from a woman, he is supposed to take care of her forever."

Yet, men in Islam can divorce their wives by simply saying "I divorce you" three times in Arabic.

Only way I'd want 4 husbands would be if one was a handyman around the house, one was a neat freak and kept the house clean and did laundry, one was a great cook and loved to do the grocery shopping, and one was good with money matters, technical issues. None would be jealous, we'd each have our own bedrooms and life would be grand, haha!

@Julie808 You forgot to say that one of them should be a licensed massage therapist....

@TomMcGiverin Good point, but if I'm not doing my own housework then I might not need a massage!

@Jolanta Ooohhhh

@Julie808 And they are all good lovers. That's something I could get on board with!


Why does the Bible force women to induce miscarriages (ie: abortions)?

Why do American men, that are Christians, force American children that become pregnant by incestuous-rape, to carry said fertilized egg to term, and give birth to said product of that criminal act?

Answer to your question and mine? Because the men of Islamic culture, AND the men of the very same culture in America are fucking monsters.

Sharia law is alive and well in BOTH cultures. (It really has NOTHING to do with religion.)


Really? Are you requesting gender equality from a religion?



You took the word right out of my mouth! 😂

Kill the patriarchy!!


This is practiced in some areas of the world. My ex often talked of it.


Why on Earth would you want more than one husband?


Control and children. If women were allowed four husbands that control would shift.

Betty Level 8 July 27, 2022

It's allowed. Most men can just run faster. LOL


.... or any other major religion allow it, for that matter?

Petter Level 9 July 27, 2022

Because religion is all about power. We cannot let women have power over men.

@Spinliesel But I like the woman on top!

@Petter That'a not power, just position.

@Spinliesel .... or a powerful position. 😜😜


Because it's a religion made by men for men. Women are second class members.

"Second"? So highly rated? I thought they were rated below sons, dogs and the car.

@Petter Well, at least the car.

Write Comment
You can include a link to this post in your posts and comments by including the text q:678598
Agnostic does not evaluate or guarantee the accuracy of any content. Read full disclaimer.