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Does anyone else find it a bit condescending that some people can have no interest in you because you don't have a " college education"?

nvrnuff 8 May 13
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3

I believe that having a college education speaks to certain personality traits that I find valuable...just as I believe that someone smoking, doing drugs, having an arrest record, being morbidly obese, being inactive, etc. also speak to someone's overall personality and suggest traits that I want to avoid.
It's no more condescending to not be interested in a smoker than it is to not be interested in someone without a degree. It's just a preference and we all have a right to our personal preferences.
You don't actually have to be offended at everything...

So yes, it is condescending

Please explain to me how a college education speaks to personality traits.

@nvrnuff simple....did they come from an environment that considered education and learning valuable? did they have the drive/ambition to complete a degree? did they overcome obstacles in their path to reach a goal? what information did they value enough to pursue knowing it at a higher level? can they do research, write college level papers, and present logical arguments? at the very least....a degree, hopefully, means they will be able to use effect, affect, your, you're, there, their, and they're correctly. πŸ˜‰

@nvrnuff Let me give you a scenario --- you meet three women at a bar, one says she has a MFA, one says she has a Ph.D. in Maths, and the final one says she didn't go to college. You INSTANTLY know a LOT about the personalities of the first two...but, really, what do you know about the third one?

@SkotlandSkye And these things are absent in someone who hasn't attended college?You have no idea what people have been through in their lives and what obstacles they face, yet you pass judgement.

@nvrnuff perhaps...but I would have to hear their life story to judge that...or have their resume in my possession. A degree gives me that story "instantly", so to speak.

Dude, I’m going to have to say that there are very good reasons not to date a smoker.

They stink.
Kissing a smoker is disgusting.
They will have health problems that will impact their partner’s life adversely, unless something else kills them first.

@DinnerandaMovie careful...there are those who will find that condescending.... how dare you have preferences! LOL

@SkotlandSkye I wouldn't make any assumption. Donald tRump has a degree.

@SkotlandSkye I would highly disagree that having a degree makes anyone a better person.

@SkotlandSkye, @DinnerandaMovie Just what does smoking have to do with a college education, or lack thereof?

@DinnerandaMovie, @SkotlandSkye That's just it, you have no interest in their life story because they lack a piece of paper. You have proved my point.

@nvrnuff See..you are getting emotional and reacting based on emotions instead of reading what I wrote. I never said I wasn't interested in someone w/o a degree. Both my husbands lacked college educations. So, duh. What I said was that when someone has a degree, it gives you a whole world of instant insight into their personality traits without having to spend hours conversing with them. This is exactly why hiring managers request resumes instead of just interviewing EVERYONE. Also, again, people are allowed to have their preferences without others getting all butthurt. I can point you to 20+ profiles by men on here who say SPECIFICALLY they are looking women with certain physical traits. I don't see you tearing them a new asshole for being condescending to women without those traits. It will be ok if you learn to just allow people to choose who they want to choose without trying to insult them for their choices. mmmm'kay?

LOL I also know for a fact that I don't want someone who gets all butthurt when others make choices based on their own preferences.... If I want to be around snowflakes...I'll move north.

@nvrnuff Having a degree means you have a degree...thats it.

@nvrnuff Sorry. An aside.

@SkotlandSkye Emotional? You are delusional.

@SkotlandSkye And there we have it folks, hahahaha.Bye Felicia.

@nvrnuff poor dear. You can’t even see how irrational and angry you are. You are angry that people have preferences. That is truly bizarre. There is a cream for butthurt. Get yourself some. ?

@SkotlandSkye You are the epitomy of condescending.

@nvrnuff oh no! You’ve outed me as an elitist snob! My cover is blown!! LOL

@nvrnuff

They don't. These days a college/university degrees have less value than they did fifty years ago. For most, higher education has become an assembly line money-making machine. They hand out credentials that in most industries/companies are considered a dime a dozen. There are many graduates working low paying jobs, their degrees and credentials are of little to no value other than the debt they will be carrying for the next "x" amount of years.

@SkotlandSkye You outed yourself.

@nvrnuff I notice that you refuse to address my question concerning the men on here who write in their profiles specific traits they insist the female have. There is, seriously, one man on here who writes that he seeks a women who "wears miniskirts". I don't see you rallying against these types of requests. Therefore, one can only conclude that you have been rejected by someone who said it was your lack of degree (probably because she didn't want to tell you that you have no discernable sense of humor and you try to dictate what others feel....). Anyhow, you also ignored the fact that I stated that, in fact, both my husbands lacked college degrees. Instead, you continue to rail this absurd argument that people aren't allowed to have preferences and must be prejudiced. I suppose it's also condescending to desire someone who isn't a couch potato or a sports fanatic.... Your lack of flexibility in allowing others to make choices that are right for them is alarming and damn selfish. I propose that YOU are actually the condescending one since you attack anyone who doesn't agree with your position on this matter.

@Stacey48 "it has the of be taken ," Could you run this by me again , hon . Didn't quite catch what you're trying to say .

@SkotlandSkye Once again, you are wrong. I couldn't care less what anyone prefers. I certainly don't care what your 2 ex-husbands have or have not done. I haven't been dumped by anyone, and I certainly am not going to give credence to your assumptions. You my dear, are one pitiful excuse for a human being.

@nvrnuff and you are an insufferable ass. And, seriously, you don't care what anyone prefers??? hahahahahahahahahaha and yet you made this butthurt post about people wanting someone with a college education and calling them names for wanting that. Yet, again, you won't deal with the issue that EVERYONE pretty much has preferences. As I said...YOU are the condescending one who thinks that people shouldn't be allowed to have preferences. I will be blocking you now because life is too short to deal with someone as ignorant as you are. BTW, if you HAD gone to college, you would KNOW what fallacy of logic you use in your statement about Trump having a degree. (A Fallacy of Logic is a irrelevant point that undermines you argument and makes you look dumb in a debate.) But, since you don't have a clue as to logical debate...you make stupid ass statements like that.

@Stacey48 Thank you . I tried plugging , "risk ," in , it doesn't seem to work . If you click on the little box , with the three horizontal lines , then select edit , from the pull down , you can easily correct and repost it , without having to retype the entire thing . Good luck , hon !

@nvrnuff Then, you'd be satisfied dating uneducated people. I don't think anyone here would gripe about that choice.

And it's just as ridiculous for you to gripe about other people's dating preferences.

(Wondering if the 97th explanation will sink in...)

@Stacey48 True . Think I've got them all now .

I am an ex-smoker. We cannot be cruel enough to smokers. They succumbed to the capitalist system and freely bought death. That is OK with me, but smokers endanger anyone around them. I fully support some jurisdictions taking away children whose parents smoke them up in a closed car for example. I remember our smoker ignorance when people commented that the air in our house could be cut with a knife: my wife responded: Yes, look how nicely smoked is our baby. I look at our smokers lives with horror and I would not live, interact with a smoker. My lungs are more important to me.

13

Some of the most ignorant people l know have a degree. I only look down at people who are shorter than l am. Oh yeah, and most Republicans. ?

I like that answer.

13

We'd say university degrees, post grad, MSc and Phd here. Apart from the phd..I have them all. I am so poor, I wear second hand clothes and work two jobs just to pay my way. No one...literally no one cares. I have to have these quals (including two registrations in nursing and advanced nursing qualifications) for my job but I carry no greater esteem to most people than if I worked in Tescos. My Dad even said he wished I had a proper job. When I have finally secure my doctorate, I will have a doctorate and I can call myself Dr. Thats it and I won't coz its wanky. Honestly...seriously happiness is a lie. Life isn't about being happy, its about being content. If you have tiny sparks of happiness along the way, you are lucky. In addition, I swear this to you, if I could now I wish I had never done any of it. I wish I'd spent my life being a Mum and making things. Be happy being you. Your value is counted by the love around you

Applause and a bow of respect.

@Donotbelieve hugs xx

12

Some of the most interesting, intelligent and attractive people I know do not have a degree. Some of the most smug, ignorant and ugly people I know have PhDs. Do not judge a book by its cover nor its page count.

11

I have a college education and I find it very condescending. I’m very much attracted to intelligence, but in my opinion you don’t need a degree for that. Read, keep up on current events, actively work to better yourself, be open minded about people who are different than you. That’s what is important to me.

11

I've known people who were seriously smart and dyslexic and people who were academically brilliant and needed detailed instructions to tie their shoelaces. A college education proves very little.

Kimba Level 7 May 13, 2018
10

Life is an education and there are many kinds of intelligence. Intellectual intelligence, intuitive, adaptive, social, musical, environmental, street (survival), psychological, and so on. A higher education is important when choosing a career that requires extensive knowledge and resources.

Someone who is formally educated is not necessarily well rounded, geniuses are often socially awkward.

A formal "higher education" doesn't determine a person's value. πŸ™‚

Betty Level 8 May 13, 2018

I wondered why I was socially awkward!! πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ Lol.

@Petter

πŸ˜‰

10

Yes, but you can also say that about most any single thing people use to limit who they're interested in. The shining example of how a degree does not mean intelligence would be Ben Carson. Living proof that you can be highly educated, and an utter moron.

10

I'm jealous of the people that don't have a college education, who make as much money as I do and who have none of the student loans I do. Their intelligence is never in question.

As I said in responds to another person who commented and would say to you. I personally respect and have admiration for anyone go can complete that long process. I think it show a level of drive and commitment that speaks as a positive attribute. With respect to finding a lover it should not be the determining factor. Well just my thoughts on it.

10

I am not sure condescending is the word I would use, frustrating, annoying.
I am on the receiving end of it a lot,
I do not have a university qualification, nor did I finish high school.
I now have qualifications in a variety of industries but they are vocational rather than academic.
But, their loss, I don't want people who are shallow in any way.
I have some achievements under my belt,
not looking for anymore, so I guess I am happy enough without the quals.

10

I think that life experience had given me more of an education than college did, and it's free! Kinda.

9

I have met some so called university educated people who are academically intelligent but when it comes to the basics like good manners and respect they are the biggest idiots I've come across

9

People choose on whatever basis they want.
I figure if they aren't interested, I dodged another bullet.

9

Since when did education equate to intelligence?

9

I think it matters if the person is curious, self-taught, and knowledgeable, or not. I have no wish to hang with some ignorant person who has never left his home town, only knows about his job, and never reads a book.
ZERO interest in that.

I agree. Formal education is not terribly important. Myopia is a non-starter.

9

It does indeed suck. But look at it as a way of avoiding shallow people.
The funny thing that I lot of people seem to not be able to grasp is that a college degree doesn't mean that you're smart.

Exactly. You learn how to respond to a set of rules to get your degree. I know a very clever man who has a degree and PhD. He was studying to be like his father an ordained minister in the church. After years of study he became an anti-theist. He was well and truly upset when I told him that I had determined the same on my own at the age of 16. He has never worked a 5 days per week job in his life but now claims a disability pension. At best I believe that he is a narcissist, at worst a psychopath. He'll be 40 next birthday.

9

Why would you be interested in such hollow people anyway?

8

I have an excellent university education and people still have no interest in me. How is THAT fair? πŸ™‚

8

I guess sometimes people decline dating β€˜undereducated’ people due to thinking they’ll have a lot less in common (conversational topics); sometimes, for a lot of people, bad spelling really does translate to dumb; and of course, there are some mercenaries, hunting for income.

Did someone actually tell a person they weren’t interested due to education, or is it a suspicion? It is a filter but I don’t select it for myself, although really bad spelling does cause me to mute prospective dates.

8

Yes i find that in very poor taste and very dis respectful on their part, just cause they have a college education doesnt make them better!

8

I must admit I have several degrees. From all the schooling that I've had, I've come to the conclusion that most people in grad schools or perhaps even post-grads are book-smart but have no common sense and very few real-life experiences. I like to tell people that some of the dumbest people I met in grad school. So, in my experience, formal schooling has no reflection on what someone's potential is.

Although you must admit that the post secondary system does churn out good employees, I like hiring people with degrees for that very reason. Just don't let most of them stray out of their area of expertise, that's a disaster just waiting to happen and it will be your money that is lost. πŸ˜‰

Common sense is not acquired....a person is born with/ without this great characteristic.

I had a revelation while I was doing some chores. Perhaps an idea that is closer to home, but along the same track, is: Does the level (# of points) one has achieved on this site affect how one is viewed by other 'members'?

8

I actually think it can work both ways as some people without degrees think that college grads are intellectual snobs. I have a friend with 2 masters degrees and sometimes I wonder how she makes it through the day without falling off the curb and injuring herself. Another friend doesn't have a degree and she is bright, well read, great conversationalist and much more worldly. So much depends on the person and to me it doesn't matter. But sadly to some people it does. Just remember that college doesn't teach common sense and in some cases falls short on critical judgement or discernment. We seem to be very tribal people even in respect to education. I pick my friends and dates for different reasons

8

If someone is that shallow, I want no part of them. A college education doesn't prove that someone is a better person.

7

Short sighted. People with 2 year degrees have valuable training and skills.

7

I'm a blue collar farm boy who is terminally degreed. Ignorance and fools abound with and without any education.

7

Uhm, this seemed to be the case in my home state before I left it. It's almost, at least my impression, like a caste system. I've some college, 77 hours, but they're probably expired or pretty much worthless by now.
I don't think it's too much to ask. If I had just a HS education would have missed out on a lot, IME it bridged the gap of a crappy HS education, stuff I should have learned THERE...so even some college is worthwhile depending on what you take.

I do NOT think it's the measure of intelligence however, as I've lost count of the number of degreed people who are just proficient in their chosen profession and seem to have missed out on a "rounded" education and appear to be embarrassingly clueless about some stuff.

That said my late dh spent little time in college and I'd consider him having been something bordering on genius. He was self taught and extremely well read and knew at least a little about A LOT. He could draw an accurate map of complicated processes of work from memory(it was graded). Just crazy smart.
So it really depends on the person, whether they've a curious mind, thirst for learning, enrichment etc. When I was in college I loved it so much wanted to go FOREVER, for the rest of my life! I loved it so hard. But life got in the way...now I just wanna paint, draw, play with dogs and look at chickens and goats with someone who's not an asshole, that smells good, LIKES ME A LOT at least and isn't a moron. That's heaven to me.

I loved school (still do) and like you could have gone my entire life, but there comes a time where it's your turn to have a life.

Loving that final line ?

@SimonCyrene LOL πŸ˜‰

@SimonCyrene my "heaven" entails a wee bit of "poop patrol" πŸ˜‰ LOL

@Qualia i have a little of that myself. I also have the whole cast of Watership Down in the acre of ground behind my (rented) cottage ?

@SimonCyrene LOL!!!! Sounds fun! Whatcha doin' later? πŸ˜‰ haha

@Qualia having a beer, practicing ukulele, watching the footy (soccer) in that order ?

@SimonCyrene I'm down!!! πŸ˜€ Ukulele eh?! Oh do play me some AC/DC with that! πŸ˜‰ haha I've got the ukulele music book for it! LOL (it was too cool not to snap up, even tho I DO NOT play) Just get Scotty to beam me over, since it appears you're over the pond... sigh

@Qualia i can do The Undertones , Teenage Kicks OR Ramones , Sheena is a punk rocker if that works ?. The Uke is pretty cool, i'll teach you a few chords. You're welcome to drop by, i have a few more beer in the fridge but you may have to listen to me swear at the screen when the footy starts ?

@SimonCyrene DEAL! LOL πŸ˜‰ I will retire outdoors to peruse the goings on of "watership down 2.0" whilst you shriek at the telly LMAO πŸ˜‰

@SimonCyrene That.... or I'll experiment and see how you are with a twist on your television viewing while you're screaming your head off....for more than one reason... ha.... πŸ˜‰

@Qualia lol that was an intriguingly cryptic message ?

@SimonCyrene }:[] πŸ˜‰

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